When virtues are pointed out first, flaws seem less insurmountable.

It [speaking with words that bring about harmony] consists of speaking of what is good about people, instead of what is wrong with them. For some people this is an almost impossible exercise, for they have become totally habituated to speaking critically. We all seem to have a special talent for finding critical things to say about the world, about others, and about ourselves! (117)

there are floods of praise coming in as well as criticism.

When considering praise or criticism first consider the source.

In the inner courtroom of my mind, mine is the only judgment that counts.

People ask you for criticism, but they only want praise.