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You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a meaningful look.


Terry Pratchett

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TERRY PRATCHETT She had heard it said that, before you could understand anybody, you needed to walk a mile in their ...
TERRY PRATCHETT His progress through life was hampered by his tremendous sense of his own ignorance, a disability wh...
TERRY PRATCHETT Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded ...
TERRY PRATCHETT Maurice watched them argue again. Humans, eh? Think they're lords of creation. Not like us cats. We ...
TERRY PRATCHETT The only superstition I have is that I must start a new book on the same day that I finish the last ...
TERRY PRATCHETT Dickens, as you know, never got round to starting his home page.
TERRY PRATCHETT Nothing I can say or devise, and nothing anybody else can say or devise, is going to be perfect.
TERRY PRATCHETT The whole of life is just like watching a film. Only it's as though you always get in ten minutes af...
TERRY PRATCHETT Seven hundred thousand people who have dementia in this country are not heard. I'm fortunate; I ...
TERRY PRATCHETT It was one of those problematic occasions with long silences, sporadic coughs, and people saying iso...
TERRY PRATCHETT Personally, I think the best motto for an educational establishment is: 'Or Would You Rather Be ...
TERRY PRATCHETT Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels.Elves are fantasti...
TERRY PRATCHETT Rincewind had been told that death was just like going into another room. The difference is, when yo...
TERRY PRATCHETT The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf ...
TERRY PRATCHETT Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels.
Elves ar...
TERRY PRATCHETT "Why does everyone run toward a blood curdling scream?" mumbled the Senior Wrangler. "It is contrary...
TERRY PRATCHETT A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.
TERRY PRATCHETT Sham Harga had run a succesful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and ...
TERRY PRATCHETT It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If ...
TERRY PRATCHETT It could not be happening because this sort of thing did not happen. Any contradictory evidence coul...
TERRY PRATCHETT An education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs ...
TERRY PRATCHETT A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.
TERRY PRATCHETT Stupid men are often capable of things the clever would not dare to contemplate...
TERRY PRATCHETT The consensus seemed to be that if really large numbers of men were sent to storm the mountain, then...
TERRY PRATCHETT For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) ...
TERRY PRATCHETT Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day. But set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his l...
TERRY PRATCHETT In the begining there was nothing, and it exploded.
TERRY PRATCHETT Gravity is a habit that is hard to shake off.
TERRY PRATCHETT The truth may be out there, but the lies are inside your head.
TERRY PRATCHETT God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of his own devising, which migh...
TERRY PRATCHETT That seems to point up a significant difference between Europeans and Americans. A European says: "I...
TERRY PRATCHETT