A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on.

A gentleman never strikes a lady with his hat on

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.

A vice president in an advertising agency is a "molehill man" who has until 5 PM to make a molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished even before lunch.

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match.

A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him.