A two-party system is way too good for those two parties.

Don't waste too much time wishing, hoping, and being envious; it'll make you bugnutty.

The thing was, I have a very good job; he has a very good job,

When 9/11 hit, the second thing I said to myself was, 'This really is what religious people do.' Those people flying the plane were very good, very pious, truly faithful believers. There's no other way to paint them. Of course, they are extremists by definition, but they certainly aren't going against Islam in any real way.

If there are two things Penn & Teller stand for, it's the truth & lying, although not necessarily in that order.

My parents were teetotalers and my grandparents were - it's all the way back. It's New English puritanical tradition.