FastSaying

Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.


Ambrose Bierce

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Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible - good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a p...
AMBROSE BIERCE How lucky I am to have known somebody and something that saying goodbye to is so damned awful.
EVANS G. VALENS Eventually I came across another passage. This is what it said:
I am not commanding you, but I ...
NICHOLAS SPARKS To kill a mockingbird. If you haven't read it, I think you should because it is very interesting.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I will never forget the vision of Jamie walking towards me.
NICHOLAS SPARKS As these images were going through my head, my breathing suddenly went still. I looked at Jamie, the...
NICHOLAS SPARKS You don't have to learn much out of books, it's like if you want to learn about cows, you go milk on...
HARPER LEE You can't really get to know a person until you get in their shoes and walk around in them.
HARPER LEE A Ritual to Read to Each Other


If you don’t know the kind of person I am
and...
WILLIAM STAFFORD Lᴏᴠᴇ ɪs ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪɴᴅ ... Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ sᴇᴇ ɪᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ ʏᴏ...
NICHOLAS SPARKS She filed the image away as an excellent and insulting question to ask the earl at an utterly inappr...
GAIL CARRIGER There are just some kind of men who-who're so busy worrying about the next world they've never learn...
HARPER LEE The role of the Christian is to let other people know what Jesus has done, not to think of themselve...
LEWIS N. ROE Naturalistic atheism debunks itself. It has no power to explain even some of the most basic principl...
LEWIS N. ROE It's important to understand that if someone calls themselves a Christian, it does not automatically...
LEWIS N. ROE A coin is examined, and only after careful deliberation, given to a beggar, whereas a child is flung...
PETER WESSEL ZAPFFE A tooth for a tooth, will make the world's inhabitants a people without teeth
SOTONYE ANGA Why, darling, I don't live at all when I'm not with you.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY The atheist might have no proof for the supernatural, but they also have no proof against it. If we ...
LEWIS N. ROE He said we were all cooked but we were all right as long as we did not know it. We were all cooked. ...
ERNEST HEMINGWAY After Rilke's Letters
-- by John VanDyke Wilmerding II

this is my letter to a young ...
RAINER MARIA RILKE Yes, their reasons are overwhelming. They are as big as hope and as deep as revolt. They are the rea...
ALBERT CAMUS …A city deprived of everything, devoid of light and devoid of heat, starved, and still not crushed...
ALBERT CAMUS Words always take on the color of the deeds or sacrifices they evoke.
ALBERT CAMUS No, no. Don't make that face. Every time I propose to you, you make that twisty, unhappy face. It we...
TESSA DARE Atticus---" ...said Jem bleakly. "How could they do it, how could they?"
"I don't know, but the...
HARPER LEE Learn to stand for something in life otherwise you will fall for anything that comes along which is ...
EUGINIA HERLIHY We are born different to make a difference.
LISA R. REYNOLDS Dreams can change histories and songs can alter destinies.
TIFFANIE DEBARTOLO Plunging in “truths” about God is like walking on the bottom of a sea that is not there, searchi...
MARIANA FULGER Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is nev...
A WALK TO REMEMBER There are things we never tell anyone. We want to but we can’t. So we write them down. Or we paint...
TIFFANIE DEBARTOLO Before we do, I suggest you take a break. If you need to go to the bathroom, this is a good time. If...
PSEUDONYMOUS BOSCH Whether you say that a god does exist, or that none do, it is a claim to know (or at least believe i...
LEWIS N. ROE This land on which so many centuries have left their mark is merely an obligatory retreat for you, w...
ALBERT CAMUS And despite the clamors and the violence, we tried to preserve in our hearts the memory of a happy s...
ALBERT CAMUS And for five years it was no longer possible to enjoy the call of birds in the cool of the evening. ...
ALBERT CAMUS You never believed in the meaning of this world, and you therefore deduced the idea that everything ...
ALBERT CAMUS The hopeless hope is what sustains us in difficult moments; our comrades will be more patient than t...
ALBERT CAMUS …Having been, not only mutilated in our country, wounded in our very flesh, but also divested of o...
ALBERT CAMUS For all those landscapes, those flowers and those plowed fields, the oldest of lands, show you every...
ALBERT CAMUS In raining bullets on those silent faces, already turned away from this world, you think you are dis...
ALBERT CAMUS He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Ye be a sight for sore eyes, lass,” he told her. “But we�...
SUZAN TISDALE Some people never take a chance and never know what it's like to live life to the full.
CHLOE THURLOW When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing w...
A.A. MILNE Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and s...
CARTER CROCKER You know," Daddy said, "it's some that can live their whole life out without asking about it and it'...
FLANNERY O'CONNOR A wise man understands, an intelligent man knows, but a fool pretends to know.
DEBASISH MRIDHA A successful teacher is one who has atleast 2 students in his class, one who sees no reason to study...
APURVA GAGLANI Have you not reason then to be ashamed and to forbear this filthy novelty, so basely grounded, so fo...
JAMES VI & I He doesn’t like making others uncomfortable.”

-Helen to Sophia about Alistair
ELIZABETH HOYT She leaned forward, her gaze so intense that Helen wanted to look away. “And I love him more for i...
ELIZABETH HOYT How to be a Poet (to remind myself)

Make a place to sit down.
Sit down. Be quiet. <...
WENDELL BERRY Beware the irrational, however seductive. Shun the ‘transcendent’ and all who invite you to subo...
CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS As far back as history records people thinking, thinking people have been befuddled by the mysteries...
LEWIS N. ROE Having been shown the possibility that God exists, the atheist has chosen not to accept it. They hav...
LEWIS N. ROE The scientific method gives us information by testing and repeating observable things so that we can...
LEWIS N. ROE The claim to know that no god exists is just irrational. The non-existence of any god has no evidenc...
LEWIS N. ROE We cherish martyrs not because they died for truth, but because they died for what they believed in ...
BANGAMBIKI HABYARIMANA Ninguém o pode aconselhar ou ajudar, — ninguém.
Não há senão um caminho. Procure entrar ...
RAINER MARIA RILKE You rarely win, but sometimes you do.
HARPER LEE if it doesn't come bursting out of you
in spite of everything,
don't do it.
unless it...
CHARLES BUKOWSKI A great man even when dead,his name will continue to elicit greatness for generations to come.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) The light of a great man shines for generations to come.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Who is a great man? A great man is a person whom people are dying to write books about.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live wi...
JOAN POWERS Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?'
'Supposing it didn't,' said Pooh...
A.A. MILNE By the side of the everlasting Why there is a Yes--a transitory Yes if you like, but a Yes.
E.M. FORSTER It takes a CONSTANT flowing of gas from the cylinder to keep the fire burning under your pot. “WOO...
OLAOTAN FAWEHINMI When people begin to define the things that they believe in, based upon the exclusion of all the thi...
C. JOYBELL C. It's sweet and everything, but it's like you're not even there sometimes. It's great that you can li...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Madame Kovarian: The anger of a good man is not a problem. Good men have too many rules.

...
STEVEN MOFFAT Unsubscribe from should-a, would-a, could-a
MICHAEL H. DANSBURY A mob's always made up of people, no matter what. Mr. Cunningham was part of a mob last night, but h...
HARPER LEE Is it just me, or do you also think this is unnatural behavior in a female parent? Isn't there a fed...
ANN EDWARDS CANNON By some miracle, Charlotte's polite smile never wavered. It was a proud moment for her. After all, i...
OLIVIA PARKER We are simply two good people with equally flawed pasts, looking for perfect futures. And I think we...
K.A. TUCKER You must have traveled all night,” she heard herself say.
“I had to come back early.” Sh...
LISA KLEYPAS If I can write, who possibly can’t. Even drawing a line in the sand is writing
BANGAMBIKI HABYARIMANA Don’t box your children in and tell them that everything is a sin. You’ll produce either rebels,...
C. JOYBELL C. Any belief worth embracing will stand up to the litmus test of scrutiny. If we have to qualify, rati...
LAURIE BUCHANAN, PHD If you think like a leader, act like a leader, inspire like a leader then you are a leader.
DEBASISH MRIDHA A godmother is always there and genuine.The help she has given will never be forgotten but will glis...
GARY F EVANS... If tomorrow was yesterday then yesterday would be tomorrow, if we think about the past why not think...
GARY F EVANS... Start seeing a way for yourself. Stop seeing a way for others.
APURVA GAGLANI and the girl and I get into her car and drive off into the hills and we go to her room and I take of...
BRET EASTON ELLIS When a lot of voices, make up a noise, the man who is silent represents a voice.
APURVA GAGLANI A man of guilt acknowledges and changes himself immediately on being hinted slightly about his fault...
ANUJ SOMANY The man I am today it's not the man of yesterday
CHRISTOPHER FUDGE The person that gives you a good book to read is more valuable than the one that gives you money,bec...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Endeavour to get a good name,because if you do,you will be indirectly making life easier for your gr...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) A good quote is far better than the best selling books.
ANUJ SOMANY Endeavor to get a good name,because if you do,you will be indirectly making life easier for your gre...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) It is good to appreciate anothers good deeds, but let not your good deeds be known to others lest th...
APURVA GAGLANI If given an opportunity to head an establishment,resite this "A good name will last better for my fa...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) If you have inherited a bad name from your parent,edit it,by becoming good,but if you are lucky to h...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Diamond & platinum are the obstacles that always stand in the way of a good name.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Let us endeavor to have a good name,for in so doing we are sowing good seeds,that will one day be ha...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) During times of sour or bad relationship a good person will always exhibit a pleasant character.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN)

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Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the e...
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
AMBROSE BIERCE Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for,...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Suffrage, noun. Expression of opinion by means of a ballot. The right of suffrage (which is held to ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Doubt is the father of invention.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
AMBROSE BIERCE Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.
AMBROSE BIERCE Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
AMBROSE BIERCE Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Liberty:one of imaginations most precious possessions.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant: a person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bone.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE OCEAN, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man -- who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZEAL, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. A passion that goeth b...
AMBROSE BIERCE For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His e...
AMBROSE BIERCE Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understand...
AMBROSE BIERCE Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
AMBROSE BIERCE You don't have to be stupid to be a Christian, ... but it probably helps.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no g...
AMBROSE BIERCE Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
AMBROSE BIERCE The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, m...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bride. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking th...
AMBROSE BIERCE Learning. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consult. To seek another's approval of a course already decided on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Happiness is an agreeable sensation, arising from contemplating the misery of others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance: a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate ...
AMBROSE BIERCE An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Let me tell you what a writer is. A writer takes comprehensive views, holds large convictions, makes...
AMBROSE BIERCE Corporation. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
AMBROSE BIERCE Don't steal; thou it never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
AMBROSE BIERCE Philanthropist. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his co...
AMBROSE BIERCE Age. That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no...
AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against one's fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Education is that which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understan...
AMBROSE BIERCE Destiny. A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
AMBROSE BIERCE Erudition. Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint. A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurrection. An unsuccessful revolution; disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad gover...
AMBROSE BIERCE Revolution is an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation. The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.
AMBROSE BIERCE A prejudice is a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
AMBROSE BIERCE Bigot, one who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
AMBROSE BIERCE Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly un...
AMBROSE BIERCE Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration t...
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiration; is our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
AMBROSE BIERCE To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.
AMBROSE BIERCE A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCE All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
AMBROSE BIERCE A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves a glorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Peace, in international affairs, is a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE An optimist is a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
AMBROSE BIERCE As records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolen...
AMBROSE BIERCE Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politeness -- The most acceptable hypocrisy.
AMBROSE BIERCE A man is known by the company he organizes.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapaciti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Enthusiasm. A distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward ap...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
AMBROSE BIERCE An egotist is a person interested in himself than in me!
AMBROSE BIERCE Duty. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.
AMBROSE BIERCE Opiate. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurance: An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comforta...
AMBROSE BIERCE Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.
AMBROSE BIERCE Alien. An American sovereign in his probationary state.
AMBROSE BIERCE Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Mis...
AMBROSE BIERCE Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is please...
AMBROSE BIERCE Wit. The salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
AMBROSE BIERCE A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impartial. Unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a cont...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the worl...
AMBROSE BIERCE Physician -- One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce. A resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consul. In American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is give...
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscien...
AMBROSE BIERCE A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Confidante. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is ...
AMBROSE BIERCE A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.
AMBROSE BIERCE An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.
AMBROSE BIERCE To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.
AMBROSE BIERCE An account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly k...
AMBROSE BIERCE Historian. A broad -- gauge gossip.
AMBROSE BIERCE Habit is a shackle for the free.
AMBROSE BIERCE Laughter -- An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.
AMBROSE BIERCE Appeal. In law, to put the dice into the box for another throw.
AMBROSE BIERCE Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, ad...
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience. The wisdom that enables us to recognize in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly tha...
AMBROSE BIERCE The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.
AMBROSE BIERCE When in Rome, do as Rome does.
AMBROSE BIERCE To be positive: to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Censor, n. An officer of certain governments, employed to supress the works of genius. Among the Rom...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bore -- a person who talks when you wish him to listen.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by frie...
AMBROSE BIERCE Irreligion. The principal one of the great faiths of the world.
AMBROSE BIERCE Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things withou...
AMBROSE BIERCE Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
AMBROSE BIERCE Genealogy. An account of one's descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Absurdity. A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abstainer. A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Woman absent is woman dead.
AMBROSE BIERCE The covers of this book are too far apart.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abscond. To move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their deso...
AMBROSE BIERCE A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE Conservative. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a Liberal, who wi...
AMBROSE BIERCE The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Alliance. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserte...
AMBROSE BIERCE ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply in...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intima...
AMBROSE BIERCE ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn."Eat ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
AMBROSE BIERCE Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
AMBROSE BIERCE International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smoulde...
AMBROSE BIERCE DIPLOMACY, n. Lying in state, or the patriotic art of lying for one's country.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds. Misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
AMBROSE BIERCE There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
AMBROSE BIERCE FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZOOLOGY, n. The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly ("Mus...
AMBROSE BIERCE HIPPOGRIFF, n. An animal (now extinct) which was half horse and half griffin. The griffin was a com...
AMBROSE BIERCE ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A m...
AMBROSE BIERCE YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander. In the So...
AMBROSE BIERCE Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscie...
AMBROSE BIERCE One who is in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was onc...
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled wh...
AMBROSE BIERCE When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover.
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity seems destined to play a most important part in the arts and industries. The question of...
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
AMBROSE BIERCE ECCENTRICITY, n. A method of distinction so cheap that fools employ it to accentuate their incapaci...
AMBROSE BIERCE LAND, n. A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property s...
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.
AMBROSE BIERCE Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affai...
AMBROSE BIERCE Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
AMBROSE BIERCE Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
AMBROSE BIERCE Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth ke...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the wor...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the...
AMBROSE BIERCE Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction ...
AMBROSE BIERCE The best thing to do with the best things in life is to give them up.
AMBROSE BIERCE TELEPHONE n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeab...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and wa...
AMBROSE BIERCE The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of knowledge.
AMBROSE BIERCE