FIDDLE, n. An instrument to tickle human ears by friction of a horse's tail on the entrails of a cat.

FIDDLE, n. An instrument to tickle human ears by friction of a horse's tail on the entrails of a cat.To Rome said Nero: "If to smoke you turn I shall not cease to fiddle while you burn." To Nero Rome replied: "Pray do your worst,'Tis my excuse that you were fiddling first." --Orm Pludge

CLARIONET, n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments that are worse than a clarionet --two clarionets.

HAND, n. A singular instrument worn at the end of the human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket.

PLAUDITS, n. Coins with which the populace pays those who tickle and devour it.

CANNON, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.