Fall Out Boy never pretended that we were anything but pop-rock.

[But as] I Slept With Someone In Fall Out Boy And All I Got Was This Stupid T-Shirt ... they wake up with Pete Wentz from Illinois.

I would never come out and say I was gay, because I'm not gay. And there's part of me that kind of wishes I was gay, and I think that that comes from anybody who is constantly wishing they were in the minority, you know, and constantly wants to be kind of fighting everybody off, you know?

As a kid, I always went to therapists; the first time was when my parents were separated on my sixth birthday, then on and off since then.

It's strange - there's a public persona of me that does nothing for me: the side of me where it's 'US Weekly,' where 12 cars sit outside my house because of who I married. That side never shuts off. I would like that to shut off sometimes, yes.

But I'm a humorist. I'm not a reporter, I never pretended to be a reporter.