Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. (Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.)


Mark Twain

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Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
MARK TWAIN
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
MARK TWAIN
Facts, or what a man believes to be facts, are always delightful - Get your facts first, and - then ...
MARK TWAIN
Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
MARK TWAIN
Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.
MARK TWAIN
Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable
DR. LAURENCE J. PETER
Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish.
MARK TWAIN
Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are pliable.
MARK TWAIN
Get the facts first. You can distort them later.
MARK TWAIN
As the facts change, change your thesis. Don't be a stubborn mule, or you'll get killed.
BARRY STERNLICHT
Facts are stubborn things.
RONALD REAGAN
Facts are stubborn things.
ALAIN RENE LE SAGE
Facts are stubborn things,
GIL GUTKNECHT
Facts are stubborn things.
EBENEZER ELLIOTT
And if you can’t shape your life the way you want, at least try as much as you can not to degrade ...
CONSTANTINOS P. CAVAFIS
I must begin with a good body of facts and not from a principle (in which I always suspect some fall...
CHARLES DARWIN
Facts from paper are not the same as facts from people. The reliability of the people giving you the...
HAROLD S. GENEEN
The facts of life are very stubborn things
CLEVELAND AMORY
I entirely agree that a historian ought to be precise in detail; but unless you take all the charact...
DOROTHY L. SAYERS
Get the facts, or the facts will get you. And when you get them, get them right, or they will get yo...
DR. THOMAS FULLER
If you get all the facts, your judgment can be right; if you don't get all the facts, it can't be ri...
BERNARD BARUCH
If you get all the facts, your judgment can be right; if you don't get all the facts, it can't be ri...
BERNARD M. BARUCH
I'm not a fan of facts. You see, facts can change, but my opinion will never change, no matter what ...
STEPHEN COLBERT
You can no more bridle passions with logic than you can justify them in the law courts. Passions are...
ALEXANDER HERZEN
I might show facts as plain as day: but, since your eyes are blind, you'd say, 'Where? What?...
CHRISTINA ROSSETTI
If you get all the facts, your judgment can be right; if you don't get all the facts, it can'...
BERNARD BARUCH
Let us take things as we find them: let us not attempt to distort them into what they are not. We ca...
JOHN HENRY CARDINAL NEWMAN
Let us take things as we find them: let us not attempt to distort them into what they are not... We ...
JOHN HENRY NEWMAN
Obviously the facts are never just coming at you but are incorporated by an imagination that is form...
PHILIP ROTH
Obviously the facts are never just coming at you but are incorporated by an imagination that is for...
PHILIP ROTH
Facts are the air of scientists. Without them you can never fly.
LINUS PAULING
Facts are the air of scientists. Without them you can never fly.
DR. LINUS PAULING
Don’t perceive the facts as a false criticism or else you lose badly! Because facts are facts and ...
MEHMET MURAT ILDAN
The mark of a mature, psychologically healthy mind is indeed the ability to live with uncertainty an...
JULIAN BAGGINI
An autobiography can distort; facts can be realigned. But fiction never lies: it reveals the writer ...
V. S. NAIPAUL
An autobiography can distort, facts can be realigned. But fiction never lies. It reveals the write...
V. S. NAIPAUL
Metaphors are much more tenacious than facts.
PAUL DE MAN
Get to know your children personally. Know that they can teach you as much as you can teach them. Yo...
NATALIE PHILLIP
Facts are the air of the scientists. Without them you never can fly.
IVAN PAVLOV
You can't make the Duchess of Windsor into Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm. The facts of life are very st...
CLEVELAND AMORY
Facts are the most important thing in business. Study facts and do more than is expected of you.
FREDERICK HUDSON ECKER
Get in the habit of vetting your research as you go - particularly research conducted online. Verify...
GAYLE LYNDS
For the serious biographer, history and the life story of a real individual are inseparably intertwi...
NIGEL HAMILTON
The American people are entitled to the facts. The grand jury is entitled to the facts. That is our ...
CHARLES BAKALY
What are the facts? Again and again and again - what are the facts? Shun wishful thinking, ignore di...
, FROM ROBERT HEINLEIN'S "TIME ENOUGH FOR LOVE"
There's nothing more stubborn than a fact. That is why you hate them so much. They offend you.
TOM ROB SMITH
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our ...
JOHN ADAMS
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our ...
JOHN ADAMS
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our ...
JOHN ADAMS
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our ...
JOHN QUINCY ADAMS
I might show facts as plain as day: but, since your eyes are blind, you'd say, Where? What? and tur...
CHRISTINA ROSSETTI
I might show facts as plain as day: but, since your eyes are blind, you'd say, "Where? What?" and ...
CHRISTINA ROSSETTI
I might show facts as plain as day: but, since your eyes are blind, you'd say, ''Where? What?'' and ...
CHRISTINA G. ROSSETTI
The facts: nothing matters but the facts: worship of the facts leads to everything, to happiness fir...
EDMOND DE GONCOURT
The facts: nothing matters but the facts: worship of the facts leads to everything, to happiness fir...
EDMOND AND JULES DE GONCOURT
But facts are facts and flinch not
ROBERT BROWNING
Appearances are not reality; but they often can be a convincing alternative to it. You can control a...
DEAN KOONTZ
Every religion is true one way or another. It is true when understood metaphorically. But when it ge...
JOSEPH CAMPBELL
The novelist has a responsibility to adhere to the facts as closely as possible, and if they are inc...
HILARY MANTEL
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our ...
JOHN ADAMS
Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts are. What feels like the ri...
STEPHEN COLBERT
The more facts you tell, the more you sell. An advertisement's chance for success invariably increas...
DR. CHARLES EDWARDS
The more facts you tell, the more you sell. An advertisement's chance for success invariably increas...
CHARLES EDWARDS
The more facts you tell, the more you sell. An advertisement's chance for success invariably increas...
DR. CHARLES EDWARDS
Facts are facts and will not disappear on account of your likes.
JAWAHARLAL NEHRU
You can only like someone so much… But never like them as much as you are gonna miss them.
MARK A. COOPER
Thanks to postmodernism, we tend to see all facts as meaningless trivia, no one more vital than any ...
ALEXANDRA PETRI
You must take into account the actual distinction between truth and fact. It is beyond all human pow...
ROSE WILDER LANE
You mentioned your name as if I should recognize it, but beyond the obvious facts that you are a bac...
ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE
When you work as hard as you can and as much as you can to make your first album, and you don't ...
ADAM ANT
Truth and facts are woven together. However, sometimes facts can blind you from seeing what is actua...
SHANNON L. ALDER
The more facts you tell, the more you sell. An advertisement's chance for success invariably inc...
CHARLES EDWARDS
Get the facts, or the facts will get you. And when you get em, get em right, or they will get you wr...
THOMAS FULLER
Get the facts, or the facts will get you. And when you get 'em, get 'em right, or they will get you ...
THOMAS FULLER
Oh, don't tell me of facts -- I never believe facts: you know Canning said nothing was so fallacious...
SYDNEY SMITH
Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts.
WILL CUPPY
Facts in books, statistics in encyclopedias, the ability to use them in men's heads.
FOGG BRACKELL
What are your historical Facts; still more your biographical? Wilt thou know a man by stringing-toge...
THOMAS CARLYLE
Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!
MATT GROENING
Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.
DAN CASTELLANETA
Science is facts; just as houses are made of stones, so is science made of facts; but a pile of ston...
HENRI POINCARE
Science is facts. Just as houses are made of stones, so science is made of facts. But a pile of st...
HENRI POINCARE
Science is facts; just as houses are made of stones, so is science made of facts; but a pile of ston...
HENRI POINCAR
In this presumption of guilt culture, which is what has come about in Washington in the last 10 or 1...
J. DAVIS
Mark Twain has been credited as saying, “The two most important days in your life are the day you ...
JOSHUA BECKER
Be all that you can be.
You can be great.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA
So you have to accept facts as fact.
AI YAZAWA
Like this gas tank, you are overflowing with preconceptions, full of useless knowledge. You hold man...
DAN MILLMAN
You can never get all the facts from just one newspaper, and unless you have all the facts, you cann...
HARRY S TRUMAN
There are no eternal facts, as there are no absolute truths.
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
There are no eternal facts as there are no eternal truths
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
Those are facts, but facts, to a child, are merely words to memorize.
MAYA ANGELOU
They wanted facts. Facts! They demanded facts from him, as if facts could explain anything.
JOSEPH CONRAD
Come as you are, leave as you please, with Christ in your heart, and God on your sleeve.
MATT ROTERT
You can be all that you want to be.
Keep dreaming and reach out to your dreams.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA
Mark Twain is as big as America. He really is.
VAL KILMER
Facts are too busy being true to worry about how you feel about them.
DAN WELLS
It was very much Carol's style: Here are the facts. Let's get it done.
JENNIFER FALIERO
If you could stay as stubborn as when you were a child then you need not to compromise on your dream...
AMIT KALANTRI
Facts are not science - as the dictionary is not literature.
MARTIN H. FISCHER

More Mark Twain

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
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My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
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Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.
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It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure tha...
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The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.
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India has 2,000,000 gods and worships them all. In religion, all other countries are paupers; India ...
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Ideally a book would have no order to it, and the reader would have to discover his own.
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I never let schooling interfere with my education.
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Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
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Civilization is the limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.
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The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed rig...
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There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress.
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In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.
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Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here firs...
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But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one...
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The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
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The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
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Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of ti...
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It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
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The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
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The lack of money is the root of all evil.
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Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
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Optimist: day dreamer more elegantly spelled.
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Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
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Man was made at the end of the week's work, when God was tired.
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Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.
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There are lies, damned lies and statistics.
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Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
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Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside...
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Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
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The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.
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Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
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I make it a rule never to smoke while I'm sleeping.
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The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
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All generalizations are false, including this one.
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'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.
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The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a ba...
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The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
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Let us endeavor so to live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
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Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
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If I owned half of that dog, I would shoot my half.
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What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed ...
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When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. B...
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When you have prayed for victory you have prayed for many unmentioned results which follow victorymu...
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The teacher reminded us that Romes liberties were not auctioned off in a day, but were bought slowly...
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By his father he is English, by his mother he is Americanto my mind the blend which makes the perfec...
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So I became a newspaperman. I hated to do it but I couldnt find honest employment.
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The people of those foreign countries are very, very ignorant. They looked curiously at the costumes...
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We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in itand stop there; lest w...
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The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large mattertis the diff...
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Say the report is exaggerated.
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A jay hasnt got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will ...
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To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature Congressman.
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I think I can say, and say with pride, that we have some legislatures that bring higher prices than ...
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A myriad of men are born; they labor and sweat and struggle; ...they squabble and scold and fight; t...
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Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts and happenings. It consists mainly of the st...
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Annihilation has no terrors for me, because I have already tried it before I was born --a hundred mi...
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Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to...
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We never become really and genuinely our entire and honest selves until we are dead -- and not then ...
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Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
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All say, How hard it is that we have to die -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people...
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Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find...
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Write without pay until somebody offers to pay you. If nobody offers within three years, sawing wood...
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As to the adjective, when in doubt strike it out.
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I am admonished in many ways that time is pushing me inexorably along. I am approaching the threshol...
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Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than...
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The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without burst...
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When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
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All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
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The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do wh...
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To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know because I've done it a thousand ...
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Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
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It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native American criminal...
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Man was made at the end of the week's work, when God was tired
MARK TWAIN
It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.
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Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to.
MARK TWAIN
Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting...
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To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.
MARK TWAIN
Between us, we cover all knowledge; he knows all that can be known and I know the rest.
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The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itse...
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Stars are good too. I wish I could get some to put in my hair. But I suppose I never can. You would ...
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There are German songs which can make a stranger to the language cry.
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The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but that they know so many things tha...
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Optimist: Day-dreamer more elegantly spelled
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Necessity is the mother of "taking chances"
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Distance lends enchantment to the view
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Be good and you will be lonesome.
MARK TWAIN
Chastity - you can carry it too far
MARK TWAIN
To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler--and less trouble.
MARK TWAIN
Most writers regard truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in it...
MARK TWAIN
Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.
MARK TWAIN
When you cannot get a compliment in any other way pay yourself one.
MARK TWAIN
There is nothing you can say in answer to a compliment. I have been complimented myself a great many...
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Never learn to do anything. If you don't learn, you will always find someone else to do it for you.
MARK TWAIN
I can't do literary work for the rest of this year because I'm meditating another lawsuit and lookin...
MARK TWAIN
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would...
MARK TWAIN
Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which, before their union, were not perceived to have any relati...
MARK TWAIN
Wit and Humor -- if any difference, it is in duration -- lightning and electric light. Same material...
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Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of Humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no...
MARK TWAIN
There is a great deal of human nature in people.
MARK TWAIN
If man had created man, he would be ashamed of his performance.
MARK TWAIN
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
MARK TWAIN
The human race was always interesting and we know by its past that it will always continue so, monot...
MARK TWAIN
Man is a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
MARK TWAIN
Such is the human race. Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat...
MARK TWAIN
It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts th...
MARK TWAIN
Of all the various kinds of sexual intercourse, this has the least to recommend it. As an amusement,...
MARK TWAIN
Scientists have odious manners, except when you prop up their theory; then you can borrow money of t...
MARK TWAIN
Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
MARK TWAIN
Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind.
MARK TWAIN
We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.
MARK TWAIN
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover th...
MARK TWAIN
A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be lead by the nose.
MARK TWAIN
Happiness ain't a thing in itself --it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant. And so,...
MARK TWAIN
There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one: keep from telling their happiness to...
MARK TWAIN
I repeat, sir, that in whatever position you place a woman she is an ornament to society and a treas...
MARK TWAIN
Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. The conviction of the rich...
MARK TWAIN
Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide i...
MARK TWAIN
Let us be grateful to Adam, our benefactor. He cut us out of the blessing of idleness and won for us...
MARK TWAIN
Intellectual work is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.
MARK TWAIN
Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions.
MARK TWAIN
I do not like work even when someone else does it.
MARK TWAIN
Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do, and play consists of whatever a body is not oblig...
MARK TWAIN
Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.
MARK TWAIN
Truth is neither alive nor dead; it just aggravates itself all the time.
MARK TWAIN
No real gentleman will tell the naked truth in the presence of ladies.
MARK TWAIN
We had the sky up there, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss whether th...
MARK TWAIN
Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True ...
MARK TWAIN
When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.
MARK TWAIN
Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know.
MARK TWAIN
Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
MARK TWAIN
We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the hum...
MARK TWAIN
There's always something about your success that displeases even your best friends.
MARK TWAIN
I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- except he...
MARK TWAIN
There was never a century nor a country that was short of experts who knew the Deity's mind and were...
MARK TWAIN
People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
MARK TWAIN
My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAIN
A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razor strap. A thin book is useful to stick under a table ...
MARK TWAIN
When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man's moral constitution and make a te...
MARK TWAIN
In statesmanship get the formalities right, never mind about the moralities.
MARK TWAIN
Fleas can be taught nearly anything that a Congressman can.
MARK TWAIN
The lack of money is the root of all evils.
MARK TWAIN
His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.
MARK TWAIN
Both marriage and death ought to be welcome: The one promises happiness, doubtless the other assures...
MARK TWAIN
All schools, all colleges, have two great functions: to confer, and to conceal, valuable knowledge. ...
MARK TWAIN
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. Traini...
MARK TWAIN
We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; and its efficiency is only m...
MARK TWAIN
There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence.
MARK TWAIN
It is by the goodness of God that we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech...
MARK TWAIN
There isn't a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American.
MARK TWAIN
War talk by men who have been in a war is always interesting; whereas moon talk by a poet who has no...
MARK TWAIN
There comes a time in every rightly constructed boy's life when he has a raging desire to go somewhe...
MARK TWAIN
To arrive at a just estimate of a renowned man's character one must judge it by the standards of his...
MARK TWAIN
One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.
MARK TWAIN
A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.
MARK TWAIN
A lie can run around the world six times while the truth is still trying to put on its pants.
MARK TWAIN
I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, b...
MARK TWAIN
The public is the only critic whose opinion is worth anything at all.
MARK TWAIN
A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which gives immortality to conversati...
MARK TWAIN
Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expe...
MARK TWAIN
Satan hasn't a single salaried helper; the Opposition employ a million.
MARK TWAIN
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare.
MARK TWAIN
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part cowar...
MARK TWAIN
Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself
MARK TWAIN
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man aro...
MARK TWAIN
Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
MARK TWAIN
It was the schoolboy who said, Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
MARK TWAIN
Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.
MARK TWAIN
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it ...
MARK TWAIN
I've never let my school interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN
In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in al...
MARK TWAIN
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).
MARK TWAIN
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal di...
MARK TWAIN
A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was getting knowledge that was always going...
MARK TWAIN
Man is the Reasoning Animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to dispute. Indeed, my experiment...
MARK TWAIN
Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the ca...
MARK TWAIN
If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the r...
MARK TWAIN
The Bible has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a...
MARK TWAIN
Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its...
MARK TWAIN
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
MARK TWAIN
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the reall...
MARK TWAIN
If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN
′Classic′ - a book which people praise and don't read.
MARK TWAIN
Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
MARK TWAIN
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN
The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.
MARK TWAIN
Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Trut...
MARK TWAIN
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
MARK TWAIN
A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN
All right, then, I'll go to hell.
MARK TWAIN
The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
MARK TWAIN
Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
MARK TWAIN
If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be—a Christian.
MARK TWAIN
To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.
MARK TWAIN
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it ...
MARK TWAIN
Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
MARK TWAIN
Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
MARK TWAIN
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
MARK TWAIN
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
MARK TWAIN