He's so ugly he should have to wear an oxygen mask.

He's so ugly. When you walked by him, your pants wrinkle. He made fly balls curve foul.

He's so ugly. When you walked by him, your pants wrinkle. He made fly balls curve foul.

A-Rod don't want to be the straw that stirs the drink. He want to be known as a fair guy who goes out and help a team to win a pennant. He's a great guy.

A beautiful face can mask great evil...

The first thing you do when you get out to center field is put up your finger and check the wind chill factor.