I didn't realize it was October until I saw the Chicago Cubs choking.

It's a character-builder to be a fan of the Chicago Cubs.

I live and die with the Chicago Cubs.

That's because I was choking.

Did you hear about this story? ... Several Minnesota Vikings players are being investigated after a boat cruise on a lake turned into a wild sex party on this boat. ? What are they, 1-3? One and three. That's the only offensive thing they've done all season, actually.

Now, today is the day we honor, of course, the Presidents, ranging from George Washington, who couldn't tell a lie, to George Bush, who couldn't tell the truth, to Bill Clinton, who couldn't tell the difference.