I don't believe everything happens for a reason. But I still search for reasons anyway. It's like I don't want to admit that maybe everything really is totally random...that people are just molecules in the air, bumping into each other and floating away again."
-p150, NOTES TO SELF

It's going to be okay. That's what everyone says when they really have no idea how it's going to be.

Dying of tetanus might be preferable to spending any more time in your company...

Everything...affects everything

And when desperation leads you into a rotting pit of self-inflicted torture, you are left with nothing but the acknowledgment that desperation played you for a fool.

We don’t have time for all this personal drama.” My eyes flit between Logan, Haydn, and Ax. “And it’s not fair on the others. The atmosphere is horrendous because of what’s going on between us. And I’m so tired of it. All of it.” I take a step back. “I’m not discussing this anymore, with any of you.” I glare at the three boys. “So sort your shit out, and get your act together. Until then,” I say, turning around. “Leave me the hell alone.