I flunked out of five colleges, and I did not know what I was going to do. And when I was sitting in the back of a comedy club, and I saw a guy who I thought sucked, I said to myself 'I can do this.' And I talked to the owner of the comedy club, and I found out you get a few free drinks.

A foul is foul no matter when it comes. Why should it not be a foul at the end? Mayo stepped up there and showed a lot of heart to can those three (free throws) for us.

This is really interesting. When I was in the 9th grade, I flunked 9th grade algebra. I couldn't cope with 9th grade algebra. And then I remember taking an aptitude test when I was a sophomore in high school, and they said, "You should probably consider not going to college." Then they said, "Well, what would you like to do?"

It did not occur to me that I might be a writer until I flunked out of my first year as a chemistry major, and found work as an apprentice writer of Volkswagen ads.

When he's not playing polo or sleeping, he is concentrating on getting well-mounted and staying well-mounted.

I've been here a long time ago, back when you could drink.