I like to make jokes; I consider myself a funny person. I just think making jokes about people who are in a situation beyond their control is not funny to them or their families.
Maria Shriver
Related I'm not too keen on jokes that are one-liners. I want the situation to be funny. PHILIPPE FALARDEAU They had some jokes. They think they're funny. I got them back. MIKE IMOH Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to te... CAROL BURNETT I like situational comedy when people are being completely serious and yet you can find something ex... BRUCE ROBINSON When I turned about 12 or 13, I realised that being funny wasn't about remembering jokes. It was... PAUL MERTON I seem to get into situations that make people laugh, but I don't consider myself that funny of ... NATHAN FIELDER Honestly, I like someone who is really grounded, super sweet, honest. I need them to have a sense of... CASPER SMART Sometimes, comics will make the observation that it's not jokes that are funny, it's charact... DAVID MITCHELL Every comedian comes to a fork in the road where they have to decide if they're going to make jo... MIKE BIRBIGLIA I don't know if you know you're funny, but you enjoy being funny. I know I'm funny becau... GREG BEHRENDT We were trying to make a movie that was funny, but also trying to be smart about being funny. We jus... ANDY BADER I love practical jokes and humor. That there's frankly no joke that I don't think is funny. ... MITT ROMNEY I used to love being the class clown. I loved to make jokes and make people laugh. There was a set o... ISSA RAE They didn't have to be funny — they were father jokes. TERRY PRATCHETT This is the one day of the year when people go out of their way to make someone laugh through tricks... VALERIE PONTBRIAND I love funny people, and when I'm with funny people, or people who are amusing in their weirdnes... PAUL FEIG As a kid, I thought of myself as a funny person who secretly wanted to be serious, but now I think m... NOAH BAUMBACH I think David Letterman is a genius. Night after night he is funny and smart. He seems to really enj... CASEY AFFLECK I think there are brilliant jokes to be made about abortion, and we should be able to talk about thi... CAITLIN MORAN My parents are really funny. Laughter was a big part of my childhood. Of course, they tell a lot of ... CECILY STRONG Being nice can be funny. A lot of my jokes are like, 'Let me take a bad situation and try to put... RON FUNCHES I don't know why I get away with some things. But I'm not a misogynistic, racist person. Yet... DANIEL TOSH When I was a kid, I would do Andrew Dice Clay jokes for my siblings. Like, we'd be on vacation, ... NICK KROLL I'm a bug on acting, which distinguishes Second City from a lot of other revues. It comes from t... BERNARD SAHLINS They started cracking jokes, and I said: 'Ain't nothing funny when I have to work the next day.' BRUCE WHITE The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible. DAVID OGILVY The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible. DAVID M. OGILVY Jokes are only funny when you have a smile that can spread and not a smirk that irritates MARK LAMBERT There's a lot of guys up there who like wearing a suit or try doing jokes that they think will play ... JIM JEFFERIES I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't make no differenc... WILL ROGERS I can really stir up a conversation. Every time I go to a meeting or a casting, I try to make it as ... CHARLOTTE MCKINNEY The movie is not all swimming and that was a huge goal to show outside the pool, ... People see me c... IAN CROCKER The movie is not all swimming and that was a huge goal to show outside the pool. People see me crack... IAN CROCKER The thing I most hate about the Left is that they want to stop us laughing - to prescribe which joke... MILO YIANNOPOULOS I don't care what the haters and naysayers say. If they make jokes about me, I'll laugh beca... PAULA DEEN I never thought of myself as like, a funny person. LENA DUNHAM But some jokes are hilarious until they become true and they’re not so funny anymore. JONATHAN DUNNE One thing I would say is real cops have real gallows senses of humor and make incredibly funny and i... DANIEL J. GOOR I don't laugh so much at jokes and premises as I do at a guy who goes onstage and starts twitchi... HARLAND WILLIAMS My dad is a really funny guy, and we would make jokes about my leukemia. When my friends would come ... VANESSA BAYER I loved Omar Vizquel. He tells some really long jokes, and he has his own way of telling them, but h... STEVE FINLEY While 'The Middle' is still funny for adults to watch, there aren't sex jokes. And I'... NEIL FLYNN 'Funny People' is my favorite performance of myself to date. Even though it's a comedy a... JONAH HILL One of the things I like about acting is that, in a funny way, I come back to myself. BILL MURRAY Jokes rot. They're not like songs. I always envy singers - Sting is always going to sing 'Ro... CHRIS ROCK For 35 years, I was a writer. I wrote a lot of jokes. Some of them weren't funny. Some of them w... AL FRANKEN I could party in a cardboard box with people who are funny and don't care. For me, it's real... KESHA I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one. MARILYN MONROE I never cared so much about making perfect sense. I wanted to make perfect nonsense. I wanted to tel... HARMONY KORINE All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me. MITCH HEDBERG Here, most of the men step to the side of the road, drop their drawers, and go when ever the mood st... JULIE REECE If I'm in a serious play, I often think to myself, 'I could make that line funny.' EVE ARDEN Artemis: I am not buoyed by that. Foaly: You are not supposed to be buoyed by that. You are sup... EOIN COLFER I usually stalk fans because I think they're really funny on Twitter. They don't know it, bu... GIGI HADID I think stutterers are funny. And I know it's rude and politically incorrect to laugh at stutter... JAMES EARL JONES If you have doubts about someone, lay on a couple of jokes. If he doesn't find anything funny, y... MICHAEL J. FOX One book that I read called “Comedy Writing Secrets” by Helitzer made a great point. He said tha... DAVID DEANGELO Take me to the height where success would seek my help to succeed! I ARE I detest jokes - when somebody tells me one, I feel my IQ dropping; the brain cells start to disappe... JOHNNY DEPP When I was in improv workshops or doing stand-up or writing comedy with others, or just doing comedy... MICHAEL KEATON I'm a fun person. I like cracking jokes and being completely nerdy. HELENA CHRISTENSEN Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and their politicians as jokes. WILL ROGERS You can be funny and say what you mean; these ideas are not mutually exclusive. Some of the best jok... HARI KONDABOLU I don't think you can teach people how to be funny. You can make suggestions about how to speak ... GEORGE CUKOR You know, it's a funny thing about writers. Most people don't stop to think of books being written b... CORNELIA FUNKE Jokes that make other people laugh at the expense of others are not jokes. They're participated calu... JOHN B. BEJO I am edgy, raw, offensive, vulgar, untruthful, but intelligent. My jokes are always realistic. I do ... VIR DAS I need to be cheered up a lot. I think funny people are people who need to be cheered up. LYNDA BARRY I lost myself in the process and I realized how much I had identified myself with Maria Shriver, new... MARIA SHRIVER In entertainment, I adore Ricky Gervais in 'Derek.' His performance is unbelievably charming... JOSH ZUCKERMAN You can learn from them, you can see what is bothering people. ... The jokes are a screen on which p... MARC GALANTER One of the nicest privileges as an actor is to know that you can move people in one moment, make the... GERARD BUTLER I think of myself as a writer with a sense of humour rather than a comedy writer. Happy to tell a st... STEVEN MOFFAT I enjoy jokes, smiling, and making people smile. I may be a little different, but that's OK, who... TIM DUNCAN Funny. Slave masters thought they were making a difference in black people’s lives too. Saving the... ANGIE THOMAS I love making people laugh. I'm not scared to do much of anything. It's definitely physical comedy w... JAKE SLAUGHTER I'm a big fan of Ang Lee (the movie's director), so I don't like all the jokes that are made about i... GILBERT CHAVARRIA I love making friends. I usually prefer to make them out of plaster and give them funny looking hats... SHORT QUOTES Everybody that's living in this earth is living in a situation. It's not narrow-minded to th... MIKE EPPS I'm an unorthodox type of guy, a funny guy - at least I think I'm funny. And one of the thin... SHAQUILLE O'NEAL His personality leans to some 'off-color' type of jokes and some people find him funny and amusing t... JEFF PAIN ABC has told me that a sponsor has complained about my making anti-Nixon jokes. I would just like to... RICHARD DAWSON I just say what I think is the funniest thing I could say. I'm not trying to make headlines. I... AMY SCHUMER (Brittany) is real funny, loud and outgoing. She can make you laugh to get you in a good mood for yo... MALLORY VOELKER I've never met a funny person who wasn't smart. I've met a lot of dramatic people who we... ROB LOWE I think one of my first jokes - in the black community, there's people who have jokes about skin... HANNIBAL BURESS Snoop Dogg is hilarious. T.I. is really funny. Who else? 50 Cent is hilarious. Jay-Z is funny. I'... JAY PHAROAH When I watch movies with my kid like 'Shrek,' I'm like, 'Wow, this is pretty funny.&... MICHAEL PENA I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one. MARILYN MONROE When the football team was down I just told some jokes and got them laughing their butts off." ... JOE ALLAN I tell jokes, chat with people, and make stuff. AISHA TYLER I'm just a regular boy who goofs around, pulls pranks, and makes jokes. I'm not Mr. Debonair... JENSEN ACKLES I find my fans are really funny people. Most comedians can't say that about their fans. MIKE BIRBIGLIA I think for a lot of people, bowling is sort of a joke. But I love it, and it means a lot to me, so ... CHRIS HARDWICK Ninety-eight per cent of laughter is nothing to do with jokes, which do not deserve to bear the weig... ARTHUR SMITH I want to emphasize that all of them are ... regretful for putting themselves, their families, their... JAY PERRY What's so funny?" Bella mumbled. "I got food in her hair," I told her, chortling again. "I... STEPHENIE MEYER I told them, in that situation you can't think about making or missing. You've just got to attack th... DANNY ANDERSON Some lucky people can be funny without half trying because they actually look funny, because acting ... F. SIONIL JOSE It's funny: most people who recognize me on the subway and stuff - it's much more they think... PAUL GIAMATTI
More Maria Shriver
I think that public service is tough on a family - no ifs, ands, buts about it. I have my own person... MARIA SHRIVER No matter who you are, what you've accomplished, what your financial situation is - when you'... MARIA SHRIVER My father never was and isn't a mean man. You know, he never was ruthless. And he succeeded in l... MARIA SHRIVER I think everybody has tragedy in their life. Everybody has hurdles in their life. Everybody has toug... MARIA SHRIVER Women somehow get portrayed as one type. You're either a feminist or you're not. You're ... MARIA SHRIVER At work, you're replaceable... but as a parent, you're irreplaceable. MARIA SHRIVER I lost myself in the process and I realized how much I had identified myself with Maria Shriver, new... MARIA SHRIVER I don't believe in gutter politics. I don't believe in gutter journalism. MARIA SHRIVER We all know what happens to first ladies who shoot their mouths off. MARIA SHRIVER to keep on doing the work and not worry what other people have to say. MARIA SHRIVER I thought a lot about what I could say here today. I also thought a lot about what I couldn't or sho... MARIA SHRIVER All right. This is what I should do. I should support what you're doing. MARIA SHRIVER We should check where we are next year. I hope everyone is in this for the long haul. MARIA SHRIVER If kids are going to be on campus six hours a day, let's be responsible about what we give them. MARIA SHRIVER I think that public service is tough on a family -- no ifs, ands, buts about it. And I have my own p... MARIA SHRIVER I don't believe in gutter politics. I don't believe in gutter journalism. MARIA SHRIVER One of my greatest joys is poetry. I read it almost every day, and I've even taken a stab at wri... MARIA SHRIVER Don't think of him as a Republican, think of him as the man I love; and if that doesn't work, think ... MARIA SHRIVER It's always inspiring to me to meet people who feel that they can make a difference in the world... MARIA SHRIVER Our mothers give us so many gifts. They give us the precious gift of life, of course, but they also ... MARIA SHRIVER You don't wanna walk around and say, 'I'm somebody's niece, I'm somebody's c... MARIA SHRIVER I miss both of my parents terribly every day, but especially as we approach Thanksgiving. We always ... MARK SHRIVER The roots of racism lie deep in man's nature, wounded and bruised by original sin. SARGENT SHRIVER It is well to be prepared for life as it is, but it is better to be prepared to make life better tha... SARGENT SHRIVER We have nothing to offer
you.. say the cows of
their gravy.. but our
blood, sweat, and tears.
(cows'... SAIOM SHRIVER Those who work for plant rights
don't parse parsley
nor bomb poppies
nor purchase antipeople papers... SAIOM SHRIVER Sunwands turn rain droplets
into blackberry drupelets
as enkindled okra seeds
acknowledge heliocr... SAIOM SHRIVER War profiteer cartels
and the Cheney Wolfowitz regime
are called The United States
by warwhore news ... SAIOM SHRIVER On a March clothesline
.. transparent icicles in a row
in the bright sun
they drip and glow
Marks o... SAIOM SHRIVER CLOVER VEIL
A clover veil..
violets the vale
neith skies cloudclad
or when ultraviolet
sun prevails. SAIOM SHRIVER The ocean:
rocking cradle of the world, sunset stairway to the stars
.. only by great masters trod, ... SAIOM SHRIVER He needn't reach the stars..
stars' light reaches him..
He needn't climb to God.
Inside him .. Elohi... SAIOM SHRIVER Violent can be sound and light
in waking us from sleep of night.
Gently comes the dawn's twilight
Ea... SAIOM SHRIVER A successful lie cannot be brought into this world and capriciously abandoned; like any committed re... LIONEL SHRIVER I suppose that's a common conceit, that you've already been so damaged that damage itself, in its to... LIONEL SHRIVER The tide sent into
the cleft of rock Neptune's
polyfingered hand of
welcome. SAIOM SHRIVER 61 died that day in the 1st infantry..in Vietnam..
two? rows of body bags.. the fruit of war...dryi... SAIOM SHRIVER The trees of life
randomly grow
but the graves of Arlington
are set in rows. SAIOM SHRIVER FOUR FLOWERS
The Sun Arose
in Morning Glory
with His Goldenrod
Wanding Violet
to Rose
(to C and R Da... SAIOM SHRIVER He has changed He has grown
No longer bud but Love Fullblown. SAIOM SHRIVER They called the wind
lackadaisical..
but because he in freedom blows
the world will never
lack for d... SAIOM SHRIVER From the shore.. one looks
upward to the sanddune grass..
10,000
green brushes attempting
where the... SAIOM SHRIVER The olive tree is
the altar of Allah.
On it Allah has placed
olives free for all.
May Allah allow n... SAIOM SHRIVER Each night the Tree of Nut
out of naught knits neat nuts. SAIOM SHRIVER The chalice is ephemeral.
Jesus' blood eternal. SAIOM SHRIVER One by one
in many countries
they break through
the ice of fear..
cups of crocuses
.. stand up in ca... SAIOM SHRIVER Reborn, Sappho
wears monks' saffron. SAIOM SHRIVER Respect for another man's opinion is worthy. It is the realization that any opinion is valuable,... SARGENT SHRIVER It's the most rewarding thing to be a civil servant. SARGENT SHRIVER Do the job first. Worry about the clearance later. SARGENT SHRIVER They were determined to find something mechanically wrong with him - because broken machines are eas... LIONEL SHRIVER I thought at the time that I couldn't be horrified anymore, or wounded. I suppose that's a common co... LIONEL SHRIVER If education does not create a need for the best in life, then we are stuck in an undemocratic, rigi... SARGENT SHRIVER Racism cannot be cured solely by attacking some of the results it produces, like discrimination in h... SARGENT SHRIVER The Peace Corps is guilty of enthusiasm and a crusading spirit. But we're not apologetic about i... SARGENT SHRIVER When Roosevelt came along, I approved of his program, generally. I figured an economic system should... SARGENT SHRIVER A jade curtain of
willow fronds
parts world of
green earth
from that of blue pond
A grey curtain
of ... SAIOM SHRIVER Those who focused on
the shock of shards
as the phoenix bird
burst from his shell
nearly missed the ... SAIOM SHRIVER A little birdie flew overhead a traffic light of green and red.
From her diagonal point of view she ... SAIOM SHRIVER It snows at sea.. quiet.... falls in flakes * melting designs**
leave form for All. SAIOM SHRIVER The bee's favorite couplet: a sunup brimming buttercuplet. SAIOM SHRIVER How do the words
of the Peaceful Master
become the tirades
of warmonger pastors? SAIOM SHRIVER Busy bees chased
the bloom chaste
Though
they crawled on her
clothes
her petals unfolded
and those ... SAIOM SHRIVER They did the little boy turkey named Art... choke
and then served his dead body with artichokes. SAIOM SHRIVER A lot of people get so hung up on what they can't have that they don't think for a second about whet... LIONEL SHRIVER Children without access to quality early education programs start kindergarten with an 18-month disa... MARK SHRIVER The sun with light umber
touches vined cucumber
The more he tickles
the more there are pickles. SAIOM SHRIVER FIRE HAS LEFT THE HEARTH
Fire has left the hearth
Nautilus climbed from shell
Perfume flowed from... SAIOM SHRIVER We gave him a pitcher. He gave us the sea. SAIOM SHRIVER When God's green grows it's rarely in rows
Awry the rye rises .. unruly the rose. SAIOM SHRIVER Weeding is plant racism. SAIOM SHRIVER You are the nectar, the hummingbird, the clover.
You are the bloom, the
bee, the OerHoverer.
You a... SAIOM SHRIVER Love, not force, rides the horse. SAIOM SHRIVER The only genuine elite is the elite of those men and women who gave their lives to justice and chari... SARGENT SHRIVER If a young person has any idealism at all, it's strongest about the time he finishes college. SARGENT SHRIVER Oh a cockroach is better luck than a cricket upon the hearth
for her magnetizes to your home those... SAIOM SHRIVER Oh a cockroach is better luck than a cricket upon the hearth
for he magnetizes to your home those w... SAIOM SHRIVER Oh Martin Sometimes your voice was the thunder..Sometimes it was the falling rain. Always it burst o... SAIOM SHRIVER He decried that any would
add another hue
unto the rainbow
yet we would ope to
saffron and jade
and... SAIOM SHRIVER The dousing wand
The lightning rod
Conductor's baton
Will's aligned spine
They find the water,
invok... SAIOM SHRIVER Out of the sea
the sun aborning
Not adorned but
all adorning
with his awesome light
of morning
says ... SAIOM SHRIVER Rigid judgmental
opinions
can block descent
of Spirit's pinions. SAIOM SHRIVER As the longfingered sun
reaches out to touch
a cloistered trillium
or a lake trembles in
the light ... SAIOM SHRIVER How awestriking. How sublime..that out of muck and mud and dirt and slime God makes lemons and God m... SAIOM SHRIVER Yet if there's no reason to live without a child, how could there be with one? To answer one life wi... LIONEL SHRIVER The existence of other people is essentially awkward. LIONEL SHRIVER Okay, it's like this. You wake up, you watch TV, and you get in the car and you listen to the radio.... LIONEL SHRIVER I realize it's commonplace for parents to say to their child sternly, 'I love you, but I don't alway... LIONEL SHRIVER The discovery that heartbreak is indeed heartbreaking consoles us about our humanity. LIONEL SHRIVER I didn't care about anything. And there's a freedom in apathy, a wild, dizzying liberation on which ... LIONEL SHRIVER Though surely to avoid attachments for fear of loss is to avoid life. LIONEL SHRIVER In a country that doesn't discriminate between fame and infamy, the latter presents itself as plainl... LIONEL SHRIVER ...You can only subject people to anguish who have a conscience. You can only punish people who have... LIONEL SHRIVER Still, I may have been glad to scratch the dry surface of our day-to-day peaceableness the way Viole... LIONEL SHRIVER You grab one or two cookies without even thinking about it. Or if you have something bad in the morn... ALANA SHRIVER I'd still like to lose about 20 pounds, but I feel like I'm a whole new person. ALANA SHRIVER I think they knew it was tough being a fat kid in school. They tried to help me lose the weight, but... ALANA SHRIVER Racists are irrational and illogical in their attempts to justify their prejudices. SARGENT SHRIVER Any idealist who tries to join the Peace Corps must realize he is not going to change the world over... SARGENT SHRIVER I wondered why people ever tried to accomplish anything when attainment of every sort was inbuilt wi... LIONEL SHRIVER Why would you want to sell millions of people on the illusion that they knew you, when they didn't? LIONEL SHRIVER Jews have suffered persecution from misguided Christians who tortured the Jews for their part in kil... SARGENT SHRIVER You can call it innocence, or you can call it gullibility, but Celia made the most common mistake of... LIONEL SHRIVER O Lord to You we give thanks
that in time Polish horses ... defeat Nazi tanks. SAIOM SHRIVER The ice does not in pain scream
when in the sun he melts into stream
nor does he in pain scream
when... SAIOM SHRIVER Do you want to be
with your love by the sea
hearing the gullsong
smelling the salt air
feeling the s... SAIOM SHRIVER Jesus' Fig Tree
He did belittle you..
but soon he'll bebig you..
and in the spring
with blooms he... SAIOM SHRIVER How many have been frozen gored starved or blown apart
by Hitler, LBJ, Genghis Khan, Churchill, or ... SAIOM SHRIVER Does he say novenas
for those with no venus
(to Dan Brown). SAIOM SHRIVER My love for you
a yearling became
many eons ago
Saiom Shriver. SAIOM SHRIVER HEART PERFUME
A rose fullblown
is the opentoall heart
.. fragrance flows from it
.. the perfume of l... SAIOM SHRIVER We sought out iconic companies who make iconic products. BOBBY SHRIVER But indifference would ultimately commend itself as a devastating weapon. LIONEL SHRIVER He looks uncomfortable, and in this respect the garb is apt. Kevin is uncomfortable; the tiny clothi... LIONEL SHRIVER Are you chuckling yet? Because then along came you. A big, broad meat eater with brash blond hair an... LIONEL SHRIVER Beware of what "everybody says". LIONEL SHRIVER Discomfort begets discomfort in others. LIONEL SHRIVER Sure...the boy was precocious. But having been precocious himself, Lowell was never wowed by teenage... LIONEL SHRIVER His weight makes him a social pariah. It reduces the likelihood he’ll remarry. It has grave implic... LIONEL SHRIVER Funny how the nature of a normal day is the first memory to fade. LIONEL SHRIVER That boy hardly needed a mask when his naked face was already impenetrable. LIONEL SHRIVER People seem to get used to anything, and it is a short step from adaptation to attachment. LIONEL SHRIVER Still, through a complex combination of optimism and longing and bravado, you would round it up. Whi... LIONEL SHRIVER I never ride just to ride. I ride to catch a fox. I play baseball to make the team. SARGENT SHRIVER I want to warn anyone who sees the Peace Corps as an alternative to the draft that life may well be ... SARGENT SHRIVER In the Peace Corps, the volunteer must be a fully developed, mature person. He must not join to run ... SARGENT SHRIVER A line has to be drawn somewhere between what is essential and what is peripheral. SARGENT SHRIVER My own apathy is bone chilling. LIONEL SHRIVER It's an apathy so absolute that it's like a hole you might fall in. LIONEL SHRIVER I came to regard my body in a new light. For the first time I apprehended the little mounds on my ch... LIONEL SHRIVER The Peace Corps would give thousands of young Americans a chance to see at first hand the conditions... SARGENT SHRIVER It isn't very nice to admit, but domestic violence has its uses. So raw and unleashed, it tears away... LIONEL SHRIVER As far as I was concerned, the Depression was an ill wind that blew some good. If it hadn't occu... SARGENT SHRIVER Change is like that: you are no longer where you were; you are not yet where you will get; you are n... LIONEL SHRIVER Whoa, that's the kind of little sister I can dig!" said Edison. "Yes, we're all alike," I said.... LIONEL SHRIVER In Kevin's book, unwitnessed disobedience is wasteful. LIONEL SHRIVER There is one province in which, sooner or later, virtually everyone gets dealt a leading role--hero,... LIONEL SHRIVER He's at home recovering and is doing great. EVELYN SHRIVER I think I had been something of a nuisance. They thought if I had my hands full, I wouldn't bother t... EVELYN SHRIVER He prizes ambiguity; he loves to keep you guessing. LIONEL SHRIVER He wasn't mad, he was sad. LIONEL SHRIVER Not that happiness is dull. Only that it doesn't tell well. And of our consuming diversions as we ag... LIONEL SHRIVER The Web, the great time-killer that had replaced conspicuously passive television with its seductive... LIONEL SHRIVER We'd been assured it wouldn't be painful, though she might experience 'discomfort,' a term beloved o... LIONEL SHRIVER I suppose that's a common conceit, that you've already been so damaged that damage itself in its tot... LIONEL SHRIVER Children live in the same world we do. To kid ourselves that we can shelter them from it isn't just ... LIONEL SHRIVER When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and let the rest of the world wonder how you did it. MARIA Alec Issignois said a camel was a horse
made by a committee.. but a camel is an animal created by
... S N SHRIVER The Southern character is opposed to haste. Safety is of more worth than speed, and there is no hurr... MARIA MITCHELL I often remembered also that I had been told, that we shall have as many devils biting us, if we go ... MARIA MONK Observation, very general and wide-spread, has shown that small children are endowed with a special ... MARIA MONTESSORI Personal health is related to self-control and to the worship of life in all its natural beauty - se... MARIA MONTESSORI It is surprising to notice that even from the earliest age, man finds the greatest satisfaction in f... MARIA MONTESSORI The child who concentrates is immensely happy. MARIA MONTESSORI One test of the correctness of educational procedure is the happiness of the child. MARIA MONTESSORI If help and salvation are to come, they can only come from the children, for the children are the ma... MARIA MONTESSORI The child is not an empty being who owes whatever he knows to us who have filled him up with it. No,... MARIA MONTESSORI Too many people say to their brokers, I can't deal with this. Take my money. Do what you want. T... MARIA BARTIROMO It is fortunate, I think, that nature is not bounded by human reason and by laboratory work and expe... MARIA MONTESSORI What is a scientist? We give the name scientist to the type of man who has felt experiment to be a m... MARIA MONTESSORI I survived many a youth hostel bunk room reading Tolstoy by flashlight. MARIA SEMPLE So for me, anything that has to do with animals, and I'm a happy camper. MARIA MENOUNOS Selling cookies helped me to realize that you needed to have a certain way to communicate with peopl... MARIA BARTIROMO Our Irish blunders are never blunders of the heart. MARIA EDGEWORTH The first idea that the child must acquire, in order to be actively disciplined, is that of the diff... MARIA MONTESSORI If education is always to be conceived along the same antiquated lines of a mere transmission of kno... MARIA MONTESSORI Times have changed, and science has made great progress, and so has our work; but our principles hav... MARIA MONTESSORI Imagination does not become great until human beings, given the courage and the strength, use it to ... MARIA MONTESSORI An educational method that shall have liberty as its basis must intervene to help the child to a con... MARIA MONTESSORI There is in every child a painstaking teacher, so skilful that he obtains identical results in all c... MARIA MONTESSORI The human heart, at whatever age, opens only to the heart that opens in return. MARIA EDGEWORTH Discipline must come through liberty. We do not consider an individual disciplined only when he has ... MARIA MONTESSORI Fashion exists for women with no taste, etiquette for people with no breeding. QUEEN MARIA If we can, when we have established individual discipline, arrange the children, sending each one to... MARIA MONTESSORI People have to learn sometimes not only how much the heart, but how much the head, can bear. MARIA MITCHELL An opera begins long before the curtain goes up and ends long after it has come down. It starts in m... MARIA CALLAS Every formula which expresses a law of nature is a hymn of praise to God. MARIA MITCHELL Women have two weapons - cosmetics and tears MARIA MITCHELL The fact that writers will go through so much to remain writers says something, perhaps everything. ... MARIA LENHART Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. MARIA ROBINSON Nature knows best, and she says, roar! MARIA EDGEWORTH We cannot create observers by saying "observe," but by giving them the power and the means for this ... MARIA MONTESSORI The teacher must derive not only the capacity, but the desire, to observe natural phenomena. In our ... MARIA MONTESSORI People have to learn sometimes not only how much the heart, but how much the head, can bear. MARIA MITCHELL Some people talk of morality, and some of religion, but give me a little snug property. MARIA EDGEWORTH I want to go berry picking on the hogback, God.
Keep me on a short leash. MARIA SC Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live. MARIA ROBINSON Every one in the world ought to do the things for which he is specially adapted. It is the part of w... MARIA MONTESSORI The man of character is the persistent man, the man who is faithful to his own word, his own convict... MARIA MONTESSORI I have received more fulfillment and adulation than I would ever know what to do with in terms of sh... MARIA BAMFORD The adolescent must never be treated as a child, for that is a stage of life that he has surpassed. ... MARIA MONTESSORI I quickly realized that shopping on Amazon had made the idea of parking my car and going into a stor... MARIA SEMPLE Not having an administrator sends the wrong message to the airline industry. MARIA CANTWELL At three years of age, the child has already laid the foundations of the human personality and needs... MARIA MONTESSORI The first idea the child must acquire is that of the difference between good and evil. MARIA MONTESSORI The greatest development is achieved during the first years of life, and therefore it is then that t... MARIA MONTESSORI If education is protection to life, you will realize that it is necessary that education accompany l... MARIA MONTESSORI The chief symptom of adolescence is a state of expectation, a tendency towards creative work, and a ... MARIA MONTESSORI That is the difference between good teachers and great teachers: good teachers make the best of a pu... MARIA CALLAS We discovered that education is not something which the teacher does, but that it is a natural proce... MARIA MONTESSORI