I live my life one weekend at time, for those two days nothing else matters, I am FREE.

I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night.

Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time ago?

I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.

Tried going out with my girlfriend but by the time she finished putting on her makeup the weekend was over.

Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better. :)
Life: LOL, give me a second!