I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.


Emo Philips

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If there is technological advance without social advance, there is, almost automatically, an increas...
, THE OTHER AMERICA, 1962
Thanks, Pepe. You've put an extra night into my life. I would have spent it just sleeping like an ox...
MANUEL VáZQUEZ MONTALBáN
He muttered something foul and then climbed the stairs, rapping twice on Timmie’s door.
“Ri...
JEANIENE FROST
The Terminator meets the Exterminator,
NANCY PELOSI
Thank you? Was that like a thanks, but no thanks? Thanks, but I’m watching a movie, leave me alone...
CORA CARMACK
I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'...
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't...
EMO PHILIPS
I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'
EMO PHILIPS
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're t...
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't...
EMO PHILIPS
You know, at parties, people always ask, 'Where were you when Kennedy was shot?' Well, I don...
EMO PHILIPS
People always ask me, 'Where were you when Kennedy was shot?' Well, I don't have an alib...
EMO PHILIPS
I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.&...
EMO PHILIPS
Always remember the last words of my grandfather, who said: 'A truck!'
EMO PHILIPS
I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than ret...
EMO PHILIPS
I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under an...
EMO PHILIPS
I ran five miles today. Then, finally, I said, 'Here, lady... take your purse.'
EMO PHILIPS
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they&...
EMO PHILIPS
You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back.
EMO PHILIPS
I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run aroun...
EMO PHILIPS
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' head...
EMO PHILIPS
The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of ...
EMO PHILIPS
I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.
EMO PHILIPS
How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.
EMO PHILIPS
People come up to me... concerned... that I'll reproduce.
EMO PHILIPS
I was with this girl the other night and from the way she was responding to my skillful caresses, yo...
EMO PHILIPS
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to ...
EMO PHILIPS
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being span...
EMO PHILIPS
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
EMO PHILIPS
Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories?
EMO PHILIPS
When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping ho...
EMO PHILIPS
My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn&#...
EMO PHILIPS
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
EMO PHILIPS
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, 'I'm going to mop the floor wi...
EMO PHILIPS
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second...
EMO PHILIPS
I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two...
EMO PHILIPS
Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist.
EMO PHILIPS
New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I sai...
EMO PHILIPS
Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because the...
EMO PHILIPS
When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of...
EMO PHILIPS
Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.
EMO PHILIPS
Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume ...
EMO PHILIPS
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, w...
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid, my goodness, corporate America was a bunch of stolid white guys in gray suits tryi...
EMO PHILIPS
I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.
EMO PHILIPS
People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?"
EMO PHILIPS
In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn't have any, they g...
EMO PHILIPS
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know...
EMO PHILIPS
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
EMO PHILIPS
I got a letter from the IRS. Apparently I owe them $800. So I sent them a letter back. I said, "If y...
EMO PHILIPS
My girlfriend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl...
EMO PHILIPS
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
EMO PHILIPS
How many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my hand.
EMO PHILIPS
I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'm firin...
EMO PHILIPS
I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wa...
EMO PHILIPS
I think of my body as a temple. Or at least a relatively well-managed Presbyterian youth center.
EMO PHILIPS
People always ask me, "Where were you when Kennedy was shot?" Well, I don't have an alibi.
EMO PHILIPS
I ran three miles today. Finally I said, "Lady take your purse."
EMO PHILIPS
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your ...
EMO PHILIPS
I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run aroun...
EMO PHILIPS
My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often.
EMO PHILIPS
I was pulled over in Massachusetts for reckless driving. When brought before the judge, I was asked ...
EMO PHILIPS
I have a lot more things to talk about now because I'm an adult.
EMO PHILIPS
I'm a great lover, I'll bet.
EMO PHILIPS
Well, my brother says Hello. So, hooray for speech therapy.
EMO PHILIPS
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked ...
EMO PHILIPS
I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under any of...
EMO PHILIPS
Friends are like television. Some are like PBS and always asking for money. Others are like the news...
EMO PHILIPS
I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.
EMO PHILIPS
Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi ...
EMO PHILIPS
2001 was tough year for Philips,
GERARD KLEISTERLEE
Philips earnings are solid, but unexciting. Revenues were strong across the board, and as far as the...
MARC KENNIS
The rules only applied to
people who couldn’t afford different rules.
CAMERON STRACHER
We are all sleeping better at night.
DAVID HAMM
Thanks for comin out, God bless you, good night...What of fame?Everyone knows your face, the world s...
TUPAC SHAKUR
Tahir Pasha assigned me a room when I was staying in his residence, and every night before sleeping,...
SAID NURSI
Friendship is a double-edged sword one side it can be great and true but the other side it spells be...
GARY F EVANS...
There was nowhere to go but the campfire at night. I had never slept in a sleeping bag. It was reall...
JOHN MCENROE
Read out my words at night, alone: I was a poet, I was young
JAMES ELROY FLECKER
I can no other answer make, but, thanks, and thanks.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
What is the Other?" they ask.
The Other is the one who taught me whatI should be like, but not ...
PAULO COELHO
Alexander the Great slept with
'The Iliad' beneath his pillow.
Though I’ve never led a...
ROMAN PAYNE
It's all to do with the training: you can do a lot if you're properly trained.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
Like all best families, we have our share of eccentricities, of impetuous and wayward youngsters and...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
My husband has quite simply been my strength and stay all these years, and I owe him a debt greater ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
It is easy enough to define what the Commonwealth is not. Indeed this is quite a popular pastime.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have to be seen to be believed.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have in sincerity pledged myself to your service, as so many of you are pledged to mine. Throughou...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I hope that tomorrow we can all, wherever we are, join in expressing our grief at Diana's loss, ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I myself prefer my New Zealand eggs for breakfast.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
The British constitution has always been puzzling and always will be.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have behind me not only the splendid traditions and the annals of more than a thousand years but t...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
To what greater inspiration and counsel can we turn than to the imperishable truth to be found in th...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
What were once only hopes for the future have now come to pass; it is almost exactly 13 years since ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
First, I want to pay tribute to Diana myself. She was an exceptional and gifted human being. In good...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I cannot lead you into battle. I do not give you laws or administer justice but I can do something e...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
To all those who have suffered as a consequence of our troubled past I extend my sincere thoughts an...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
Grief is the price we pay for love.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
The upward course of a nation's history is due in the long run to the soundness of heart of its ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II

More Emo Philips

I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'...
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't...
EMO PHILIPS
I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'
EMO PHILIPS
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're t...
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't...
EMO PHILIPS
You know, at parties, people always ask, 'Where were you when Kennedy was shot?' Well, I don...
EMO PHILIPS
People always ask me, 'Where were you when Kennedy was shot?' Well, I don't have an alib...
EMO PHILIPS
I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.&...
EMO PHILIPS
Always remember the last words of my grandfather, who said: 'A truck!'
EMO PHILIPS
I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than ret...
EMO PHILIPS
I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under an...
EMO PHILIPS
I ran five miles today. Then, finally, I said, 'Here, lady... take your purse.'
EMO PHILIPS
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they&...
EMO PHILIPS
You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back.
EMO PHILIPS
I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run aroun...
EMO PHILIPS
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' head...
EMO PHILIPS
The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of ...
EMO PHILIPS
I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.
EMO PHILIPS
How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.
EMO PHILIPS
People come up to me... concerned... that I'll reproduce.
EMO PHILIPS
I was with this girl the other night and from the way she was responding to my skillful caresses, yo...
EMO PHILIPS
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to ...
EMO PHILIPS
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being span...
EMO PHILIPS
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
EMO PHILIPS
Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories?
EMO PHILIPS
When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping ho...
EMO PHILIPS
My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn&#...
EMO PHILIPS
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
EMO PHILIPS
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, 'I'm going to mop the floor wi...
EMO PHILIPS
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second...
EMO PHILIPS
I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two...
EMO PHILIPS
Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist.
EMO PHILIPS
New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I sai...
EMO PHILIPS
Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because the...
EMO PHILIPS
When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of...
EMO PHILIPS
Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.
EMO PHILIPS
Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume ...
EMO PHILIPS
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, w...
EMO PHILIPS
When I was a kid, my goodness, corporate America was a bunch of stolid white guys in gray suits tryi...
EMO PHILIPS
I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.
EMO PHILIPS
People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?"
EMO PHILIPS
In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn't have any, they g...
EMO PHILIPS
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know...
EMO PHILIPS
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
EMO PHILIPS
I got a letter from the IRS. Apparently I owe them $800. So I sent them a letter back. I said, "If y...
EMO PHILIPS
My girlfriend said to me in bed last night' 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl...
EMO PHILIPS
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
EMO PHILIPS
How many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my hand.
EMO PHILIPS
I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'm firin...
EMO PHILIPS
I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wa...
EMO PHILIPS
I think of my body as a temple. Or at least a relatively well-managed Presbyterian youth center.
EMO PHILIPS
People always ask me, "Where were you when Kennedy was shot?" Well, I don't have an alibi.
EMO PHILIPS
I ran three miles today. Finally I said, "Lady take your purse."
EMO PHILIPS
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your ...
EMO PHILIPS
I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run aroun...
EMO PHILIPS
My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often.
EMO PHILIPS
I was pulled over in Massachusetts for reckless driving. When brought before the judge, I was asked ...
EMO PHILIPS
I have a lot more things to talk about now because I'm an adult.
EMO PHILIPS
I'm a great lover, I'll bet.
EMO PHILIPS
Well, my brother says Hello. So, hooray for speech therapy.
EMO PHILIPS
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked ...
EMO PHILIPS
I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under any of...
EMO PHILIPS
Friends are like television. Some are like PBS and always asking for money. Others are like the news...
EMO PHILIPS
I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.
EMO PHILIPS
Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi ...
EMO PHILIPS
Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
EMO PHILLIPS
The view on life isn't just change , but time
EMO STAR
Women! Ya can't live with 'em and ya can't get 'em to wear skimpy little Nazi outfits.
EMO PHILLIPS
I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was tell...
EMO PHILLIPS
People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?"
EMO PHILLIPS
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
EMO PHILLIPS
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second...
EMO PHILLIPS
The flowers anew, returning seasons bring! But beauty faded has no second spring.
AMBROSE PHILIPS
Studious of ease, and fond of humble things.
AMBROSE PHILIPS
Little pains In a due hour employ'd great profit yields.
JOHN PHILIPS
Save the Planet...Buy Organic
NANCY PHILIPS
My galligaskins, that have long withstood The winter's fury, and encroaching frosts, By time s...
JOHN PHILIPS
Students joining friends their age for graduation ceremonies can be a very special moment in their d...
KATE PHILIPS
The governor understands that the contract allows Penguins owners to take the team to another city i...
KATE PHILIPS
My hunch is this is going to be the setting stage for things to come.
CHUCK PHILIPS
The flowers anew, returning seasons bring; but beauty faded has no second spring.
AMBROSE PHILIPS
All these horror movies are slasher film now. I like them, they're fun, but they wink at the aud...
GINA PHILIPS
The underlying fundamentals remain decent, but the pessimism is getting higher. The biggest hindranc...
ROBERT PHILIPS
Obviously the commonwealth is not a bank, and it is not in a position to provide loans to county or ...
KATE PHILIPS
We hope it doesn't come to that. But, at the end of the day, we cannot put the port (of Philadelphia...
KATE PHILIPS
The governor cannot dictate to the commission.
KATE PHILIPS
We will not be moving forward. It's disappointing that we couldn't bring this to fruition right now.
KATE PHILIPS
If a person is accused of murder and there is a warrant out for their arrest, we would arrest them. ...
KATE PHILIPS
The governor still believes it's appropriate for the federal government to take action but inaction ...
KATE PHILIPS
The benefits per person would not outweigh the cost to the greater commonwealth, at first glance.
KATE PHILIPS
I would not at all characterize the governor as being scared of him by any measure. Both are strong ...
KATE PHILIPS
The governor rarely visits Pittsburgh when he doesn't talk to every third person about the arena.
KATE PHILIPS
They made good progress and the governor believes there is a general commitment by all four caucuses...
KATE PHILIPS
I think the Nasdaq probably bottomed Monday, and we're in the process overall of making a very meani...
ROBERT PHILIPS
There is no functional difference between a wire-based phone call and a wireless phone call, so they...
KATE PHILIPS
From a technical standpoint the market is in a pretty good place. But I think it's a classic summer ...
ROBERT PHILIPS
They produced solid enough numbers but debate on the issues coming out of their trading statement ne...
HARRY PHILIPS
The governor would maintain his position if the bill comes to him.
KATE PHILIPS
The believer is not a slave to fashion.

ABU AMEENAH BILAL PHILIPS
Busy yourself with what is pleasing to Allah, or Satan will busy you with what displeases Him.
ABU AMEENAH BILAL PHILIPS