I would like to experience this 'date' phenomenon.

In the days that follow, it's movement, not stillness, that helps to keep the grief at bay.

All I can do is stand still- I feel like if I just stand still, I can stop it from being true, I can pretend that everything is all right.

One thing I know: For helping me forget how awful the world is, I prefer her to alcohol.

It's stupid to miss a thing when there are so many people to miss instead, but I miss this train already, and all the others that carried me through the city, my city, after I was brave enough to ride them. I brush my fingers over the car wall, just once, and then jump.

I don’t know how long it takes for me to realize that isn’t going to happen,
that she is gone. But when I do I feel all the strength go out of me, and I fall to my knees beside the table and I think I cry, then, or at least I want to, and everything inside me screams for just one more kiss, one more word, one more glance, one more.