If you were smart," Genghis said, "you would have borrowed the silverware of one of your friends." "We never thought of that," Klaus said. When one is forced to tell atrocious lies, one often feels a guilty flutter in one's stomach, and Klaus felt such a flutter now. "You certainly are an intelligent man." "Not only am I intelligent," Genghis agreed, "but I'm also very smart.
Lemony Snicket
Related The majority is never right. Never, I tell you! That's one of these lies in society that no free and... HENRIK IBSEN The majority is never right. Never, I tell you! That's one of these lies in society that no free and... HENRIK IBSEN ...at the time, King Herbert felt that to remain safe, the kingdom needed an effective intelligence ... JOHN FLANAGAN You write poetry?" Klaus asked. He had read a lot about poets but had never met one. "Just... LEMONY SNICKET There is a plain under a dim sky. It is covered with gentle rolling curves that might remind you of ... TERRY PRATCHETT I ope ya don't mind, Charlie, but I borrowed one a ya effs.' 'Ya did?' 'Yeah.' he smiled. ... ROBERT NEWTON Are you ready?" Klaus asked finally. "No," Sunny answered. "Me neither," Violet said, "but... LEMONY SNICKET Welcome, Prince,' said Aslan. 'Do you feel yourself sufficient to take up the Kingship of Narnia?' C.S. LEWIS I thought you said you were the one in charge!" Ce'Nedra exclaimed. I lied." Silk said. "... DAVID EDDINGS The Doctor: [aiming gun at the ceiling] Didn't anyone ever tell you? There's one thing you never put... STEVEN MOFFAT How do you think we smart we realy are? If the whole world, economic, and everything around us,... VICDO I would not hurt you, little man,' he said. 'I think that I got the disorder in Mullingar... FLANN O'BRIEN But what would have been the good?" Aslan said nothing. "You mean," said Lucy rather fai... C.S. LEWIS I remember the time an older man asked me when I was young, "Do you know what you are doing now?" I ... RAVI ZACHARIAS How did you do that?” Mr. Poe asked. “Nice girls shouldn’t know how to do such things.” LEMONY SNICKET Do you know, I always thought unicorns were fabulous monsters, too? I never saw one alive before!" LEWIS CARROLL Daniel, he said. I would have you follow me. Master!....I will fight for you to the end!.... ELIZABETH GEORGE SPEARE The majority is never right. Never, I tell you! That's one of these lies in society that no free and... HENRIK IBSEN Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyon... LEMONY SNICKET Damon spoke without moving. “I’m not like you.” “You’re not as different from us as y... L.J. SMITH As the cheering continued, Rhyme leaned forward and touched Milo gently on the shoulder. "The... NORTON JUSTER What's up?" I asked. You tell me," he said. "You were the one about ready to start making... RICHELLE MEAD You may not instantly see why I bring the subject up, but that is because my mind works so phenomena... DOUGLAS ADAMS Its funny," said Vena. "I never knew I had the talent, but people will come miles for my dumplings."... TERRY PRATCHETT Are you afraid now?" said Gregor. "At times," she admitted. "But it is no worse than if I were ... SUZANNE COLLINS Thank you sir," she said. "I hope that your friend feels better soon." I shrugged. "The ways of... ROBERT B. PARKER Me plus you. (Imma tell you one time) Me plus you. (Imma tell you one time) Me plus you. (Imma ... JUSTIN BIEBER You said that you are smart, didn't you? 2112@1%, 2%1%2! 1(81%1@4 25 71@14 2)812) 2)85 69... DEYTH BANGER I pulled the MG in beside him at the curb and he got in. "This thing ain't big enough for eithe... ROBERT B. PARKER (You do not have to be shamed in my closeness. Family are the people who must never make you feel as... JONATHAN SAFRAN FOER If he can't get to the clock, any idea how we deal with this lot?" "With great care," Donegan s... DEREK LANDY Do you have a Wish?' he asked, referring to this organization, The Genie Foundation, which is in the... JOHN GREEN We are the silver people, the Mongols. When they ask, tell them there are no tribes. Tell the... CONN IGGULDEN In fact, he's never taken an interest in a woman before. I was beginning to to suspect he might pref... MARIA V. SNYDER Can I just point something out?" Fletcher asked. "That is an awful plan. On a scale of one ... DEREK LANDY Only if you are afraid of looking foolish, and I would have looked far more foolish if I persisted w... CHRISTOPHER PAOLINI We met at a cross-roads in life, But we were going different directions. We were part of e... MARGO T. ROSE I am a lonely man," he said again that evening. "And is it not possible that you are also a lonely p... SōSEKI NATSUME Mr. Montag, you are looking at a coward. I saw the way things were going a long time back. I said no... RAY BRADBURY I thought he said you weren’t drunk if you could find your arse with both hands.” He ... DIANA GABALDON I think of you often and make no outward show, But what it means to lose you, no one will ... ANON. You don't know about falling off cliffs, Preppie,' she said. 'You never fell off one in your god... ERICH SEGAL One of the Great Rules of Economics According to John Green If you are rich, you have to be an ... JOHN GREEN You are very clever," said the old man shyly. "I would like to eat your brains, one day." For s... TERRY PRATCHETT I always thought they were fabulous monsters!" said the Unicorn. "Is it alive?" "It can talk," ... LEWIS CARROLL One day,' you said, 'I watched the sunset forty-three times!' And a little later you adde... ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPéRY She's going to do nothing but try to trick information out of me that I shouldn't be giving her, Mac... JIM BUTCHER I was at a dinner party many years ago,sitting along from Tom Stoppard, who in those days smoked not... STEPHEN FRY You’re kind of a psycho. I get that.” “I might be,” Monica agreed, and gave her a slow,... RACHEL CAINE There is still one of which you never speak.' Marco Polo bowed his head. 'Veni... ITALO CALVINO And he said, “The joy of scaring is a deep and lasting one, and I never tire of it.” KAHLIL GIBRAN If I had a daughter, here's what I'd tell her: One day, when you've worked hard for what... PATRICIA V. DAVIS Young people," McDonald said contemptuously. "You always think there's something to find out." ... JOHN WILLIAMS His voice gentled and his touch became more like a caress. "I love you," he whispered. "Romeo.... CAMBRIA HEBERT All Julie has to do is explain to her friends that she's using it to individually seal each item tha... LEE GOLDBERG I want you to tell me about every person you’ve ever been in love with. Tell me why you loved... ANDREA GIBSON Woman, where are they? Has no one judged you guilty?" She answers "No one, sir." Then Jesu... MAX LUCADO You're in a bad mood,' Skulduggery said. 'I understand. I do. You're saying things that you don't re... DEREK LANDY You read a book for the story, for each of its words," Gordy said, "and you draw your cartoons for t... SHERMAN ALEXIE Shahrzad, I've failed you several times. But there was one moment I failed you beyond m... RENEE AHDIEH I am Shiloh, whose box you stole. Your godmother's sickness lies in your own keeping, you can heal h... A.E. COPPARD It isn't Narnia, you know," sobbed Lucy. "It's you. We shan't meet you there. And how can we live, n... C.S. LEWIS The Unicorn looked dreamily at Alice, and said "Talk, child." Alice could not help her lips cur... LEWIS CARROLL It is perfectly serendipitous,' said the boy, descending the steps to the street. 'Fancy that—us m... ELEANOR CATTON If only you would realize some day, how much have you hurt me, If only your heart ever, craves ... MEHEK BASSI I can't believe you didn't tell me you have a phone." "It is a penis move," said Ethan ag... JILL MYLES Eros mumbled something. "I'm sorry?" said Aphrodite. "Whatwouldjesusdo." "What would ... MARIE PHILLIPS All the things that you said when you thought I wasn't there, I just tell them to my corner, 'c... MARGO T. ROSE For your penance," the Bishop said finally, "say three rosaries, one for each year of your sinful li... ROSAMUND HODGE Well then," Roen said briskly, "are you sleeping?" "Yes." "Come now. A mother can tell whe... KRISTIN CASHORE To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of chi... RALPH WALDO EMERSON I had a dream about you. We were in the gold room where everyone finally gets what they want. RICHARD SIKEN Do you have information that there's an android in the cast? I'd be glad to help you, and if I were ... PHILIP K. DICK ...You want to know whether the problems that you teenagers feel—will they follow you over the res... MEG WOLITZER Tell me, have you done much circus work in your life?' [asked Mulder]. Nutt drew himself up to ... LES MARTIN I was certain I told you the king was coming.” She planted her hands on her hips. “Yo... JILL BARNETT O Deep Thought computer," he said, "the task we have designed you to perform is this. We want you to... DOUGLAS ADAMS The fact is that we have no way of knowing if the person who we think we are is at the core o... DEREK LANDY Aslan" said Lucy "you're bigger". "That is because you are older, little one" answered he. C.S. LEWIS I started to walk away, but she [Clarisse] called out, "Percy?" "Yeah?" "When you, uh, had... RICK RIORDAN Here is the secret of inspiration: Tell yourself that thousands and tens of thousands of people, not... WILLIAM FEATHER Here is the secret of inspiration: Tell yourself that thousands and tens of thousands of people, not... WILLIAM FEATHER I have brought peace to this land, and security," he began. "And what of your soul, when ... IAIN PEARS It is useless for me to describe to you how terrible Violet, Klaus, and even Sunny felt in the time ... LEMONY SNICKET Real friends are the ones you can count on no matter what. The ones who go into the forest to f... MORGAN MATSON Jace perched on the windowsill and looked down at him. "You really don't get this bodyguard thing, d... CASSANDRA CLARE You're not going to tell me they built fifty-foot-high killer golems, are you?" "Only a m... TERRY PRATCHETT If you were only one inch tall, you'd ride a worm to school. The teardrop of a crying ant would... SHEL SILVERSTEIN I am no king, and I am no lord, And I am no soldier at-arms," said he. "I'm none but a har... PETER S. BEAGLE Hot, short, thorough," I said. I hesitated before adding, "Please." It never pays to insult computer... MIRA GRANT You never see animals going through the absurd and often horrible fooleries of magic and religion. .... ALDOUS HUXLEY What are you thinking of so earnestly?" said he, as they walked back to the ballroom; "not of your p... JANE AUSTEN Do you love me, Westley? Is that it?’ He couldn’t believe it. ‘Do I love you? My God, if... WILLIAM GOLDMAN I want a tutor,” Layla said. “It would make doing homework so much easier.” “Me too,”... CLAIRE LAZEBNIK I was waiting for the longest time, she said. I thought you forgot. It is hard to forget,... BRIAN ANDREAS It's a fact—everyone is ignorant in some way or another. Ignorance is our deepes... VERA NAZARIAN Cohen looked at the forest of lances and pennants. Hundreds of thousands of men looked like quite a ... TERRY PRATCHETT I am looking for friends. What does that mean -- tame?" "It is an act too often neglected... ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPéRY Let’s consider your age to begin with — how old are you?’ ‘I’m seven and a half... LEWIS CARROLL Why are we bringing him along, again?" Will inquired, of the world in general as well as his sister.... CASSANDRA CLARE
More Lemony Snicket
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LEMONY SNICKET Of course, it is boring to read about boring thing, but it is better to read something that makes yo... LEMONY SNICKET It is very useful, when one is young, to learn the difference between "literally" and "figuratively.... LEMONY SNICKET I will love you as a thief loves a gallery and as a crow loves a murder, as a cloud loves bats and a... LEMONY SNICKET Of course I'm trying to trick you!" Olaf cried. "That's the way of the world, Baudelaires. Everybody... LEMONY SNICKET Appearance matters a great deal because you can often tell a lot about people by looking at how they... LEMONY SNICKET Aha! " My chaperone looked at me like I should aha! back, but all I could m... LEMONY SNICKET Various parts of my body told me that in the future they would appreciate it if I slept lying down o... LEMONY SNICKET There was still plenty of water in the basement, and I felt it soaking me from the knees on down. If... LEMONY SNICKET It looked like something the Hemlock needed, or a piece of equipment a plumber had left behind. It l... LEMONY SNICKET But the world did not match the picture in my head, and instead I was with a strange, uncombed perso... LEMONY SNICKET They were almond cookies, although they could have been made of spinach and shoes for all I cared. I... LEMONY SNICKET It felt like the wrong thing to do, standing at the wrong door in the wrong place. We did it anyway.... LEMONY SNICKET Stretched out in front of me was my time as an adult, and then a skeleton, and then nothing except p... LEMONY SNICKET It is always terrible to be told to go play with people one doesn’t know... LEMONY SNICKET The map is not the territory. LEMONY SNICKET I do what I do," I said, "in order to do something else. LEMONY SNICKET Nothing firms up a friendship like a good-natured argument. LEMONY SNICKET You must be all a-tingle with excitement.' 'I guess so,' I said, but I did not feel a-tingle. I... LEMONY SNICKET I thought maybe if I stared hard enough, I could see the lights of the city I had left so very far b... LEMONY SNICKET The library was one enormous room, with long, high metal shelves and the perfect quiet that librarie... LEMONY SNICKET There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap,... LEMONY SNICKET I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. It is good to brush your teeth when you are angry, becau... LEMONY SNICKET There was something I was always very good at, however, and that was teaching myself not to be frigh... LEMONY SNICKET Scolding must be very, very fun, otherwise children would be allowed to do it. It is not because chi... LEMONY SNICKET So you’re reluctant, I said to myself. Many, many people are reluctant. It’s like having feet. I... LEMONY SNICKET The children of this world and the adults of this world are in entirely separate boats and only drif... LEMONY SNICKET A mystery is solved with a story. LEMONY SNICKET I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get ... LEMONY SNICKET You may be right,' she said, a phrase which here meant 'I’m wrong, but I don’t have the courage ... LEMONY SNICKET Knowing that something is wrong and doing it anyway happens very often in life, and I doubt I will e... LEMONY SNICKET There's an easy method for finding someone when you hear them scream. First get a clean sheet of pap... LEMONY SNICKET Don’t repeat yourself. It’s not only repetitive, it’s redundant, and people have heard it befo... LEMONY SNICKET They say in every library there is a single book that can answer the question that burns like a fire... LEMONY SNICKET How clever of you to figure that out,' said a voice at the top of the stairs, and Violet, and Klaus ... LEMONY SNICKET I'm not a stranger," I said, and pointed to his book. "I'm someone who reads the same authors you do... LEMONY SNICKET There is nothing wrong with crying at the end of a long day. LEMONY SNICKET being skeptical is a good thing for a journalist, because it means you don't completely trust anyone... LEMONY SNICKET There are people in the world who care about automobiles, and there are people who couldn't care les... LEMONY SNICKET Perhaps I had been in another world before I was born, and did not remember it, or perhaps I would s... LEMONY SNICKET There are many mysteries I have never solved, and the hair of my chaperone is perhaps my most curiou... LEMONY SNICKET It is never seven that you count to, before you do something difficult. It is never at the count of ... LEMONY SNICKET The three of us stood there for a minute. I don’t know what Stew was thinking, and the filing cabi... LEMONY SNICKET When you need a haircut, it looks like you have no one to take care of you. LEMONY SNICKET I don't know why wicked places generally look wicked. You'd think they'd look nice, to fool people, ... LEMONY SNICKET They can teach you anything. That doesn't mean you learn it. It doesn't mean you believe it. LEMONY SNICKET The trick to following someone without getting caught is to follow somebody who doesn't think they'r... LEMONY SNICKET I thought the war was a simple matter, with one side good and the other evil. But the more I read, t... LEMONY SNICKET Complimenting someone in an exaggerated way is known as flattery, and flattery will generally get yo... LEMONY SNICKET Of course you can trust me," Jake Hix said. "We read the same books. LEMONY SNICKET It is a lonely feeling when someone you care about becomes a stranger. LEMONY SNICKET Nobody should feel pain all by themselves. LEMONY SNICKET There are some secrets you want to keep to yourself, even if they don't matter. They might only matt... LEMONY SNICKET It seemed to me that every adult did something terrible sooner or later. And every child, I thought,... LEMONY SNICKET