I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.

If the events of September 11, 2001, have proven anything, it's that the terrorists can attack us, but they can't take away what makes us American -- our freedom, our liberty, our civil rights. No, only Attorney General John Ashcroft can do that.

Being a superpower is like being a Santa Claus that everyone hates.

What part of Canada are you from, honey?"

"THE LEFT PART," said Jay.

We're the only remaining traditional barber school in Canada.

This is proof that we are committed to reconciling aboriginal rights in Canada, ... We aren't stuck in the past, we are prepared to evolve.