Let's have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it.
Anonymous
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COLIN DEXTER If you can dream it, you can do it.
ENZO FERRARI They who drink beer will think beer.
WASHINGTON IRVING Do the thing and you will have the power.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON If it's what you do and you can do it, then you do it.
VAN MORRISON If you think you can do it, you can.
JOHN BURROUGHS It ain't bragging if you can do it.
DIZZY DEAN Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to...
HOMER SIMPSON You are an adult and you don't understand me and what are the differences between the adult and the ...
DEYTH BANGER There shall be in England seven halfpenny loaves sold for a
penny; the three-hooped pot shall have ...
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE God walked with humanity in the cool of the day and gave them the most difficult and hottest parts o...
JOEY TALLADINO Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER It is a lie.
ARTHUR MILLER I enjoy my beer. It's a fun hobby, and you get to drink your handiwork.
JAY BERMAN You may receive a pie, eat it and forget. You may receive champagne, drink it and forget. But when y...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR The negative aspect is people will have a false sense of security. Because the beer is mixed with ca...
DANIEL SHEA Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world.
JACK NICHOLSON You must be the person you have never had the courage to be. Gradually, you will discover that you a...
PAULO COELHO I appreciate the fact that you have one redeeming quality, Jack, but that is all it is. Just a hint ...
K.A. LINDE If you want to find something with an equation, you must start thinking like a person who have it.
DEYTH BANGER When you say, "I can't do it!" - You never will.
But, if you say, "I'll give it a try," eventua...
ANTHONY T. HINCKS I didn't drink a single beer until my senior year,
TOM MURPHY Have a robust mindset; dare to move any mountain!
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH If you do not believe you can do it then you have no chance at all.
ARSENE WENGER Why be greedy when you can have it all.
ANTHONY T. HINCKS I never had one beer. If I bought a six-pack of beer, I kept drinking till all six beers were gone. ...
SAMUEL L. JACKSON Beer is the Danish national drink, and the Danish national weakness is another beer.
CLEMENTINE PADDLEFORD Had an awesome time. You tell me to show up and all I have to do is drink beer, play guitar all day ...
ZAKK WYLDE To stand on the
brink of what is coming, feeling eager, optimistic anticipation—with no feeli...
ASK AND IT IS GIVEN If you can say it... it's obvious.
DEYTH BANGER It is what it is, it is what you make it.
JAMES DURBIN If that drink were ever sold in Homestead, it would fizzle. What was served was a shot and a beer.
BETTY ESPER We take a risk when we open our hearts because the truth is, if we open our hearts, we will get hurt...
MARY MANIN MORRISSEY I'm always an outsider in that group. I don't drink coffee and when they get together, it's often ov...
BONNIE TYLER There shall be in England seven halfpenny loaves sold for a penny; the three-hooped pot shall have t...
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE Good people drink good beer.
HUNTER S. THOMPSON You silly," said Abdul, "those clouds don' mean nothing. I see'd them plenty a'ready. It was jus' co...
THEO ENGELA Pretty women make us BUY beer. Ugly women make us DRINK beer.
ED O'NEILL Success is a Journey: so, don’t forget to pack your COURAGE: to face the obstacles heading your wa...
PHILIP T. M. That's the thing that always gets me. We have to have football, because you reach young guys who dri...
JOE QUEENAN You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kin...
FRANK ZAPPA You've got to drink more beer. I never cramp up.
BOB LECKIE YOU are YOU! Know YOU can! YOU must not be afraid because God has a prosperous future plan for YOU! ...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and...
JACK HANDEY It is the giving wolf, who is also the killing wolf....
MASTER CHIEF 117 Well, basically there are two sorts of opera," said Nanny, who also had the true witch's ability to ...
TERRY PRATCHETT I don't think anything is unrealistic if you believe you can do it.
RICHARD L. EVANS If you value your time, You'll get some reasons to smile in return.
MD. NAZRUL ISLAM A weird thing happens when you get a glimpse of that side of you. A child-like zeal possesses you. I...
K.J. KILTON If you can do it, why you won't do it???
If you have chance why you won't use it?
DEYTH BANGER You have to work harder to achieve your goals
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA Failure is not the final fall.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA A boss says “go and make sure you do it”; a leader says “let’s go and make it happen”. Bos...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR You can never buy beer, you just rent it.
ARCHIE BUNKER ...Okay... probably now you have read all my books up to now..., you have check out everything what ...
DEYTH BANGER It is a growing process. You can't just like beer. You have to start somewhere and learn the dif...
ISAAC HANSON There are so many things we do in life that define the real meaning of our lives. There are so many ...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH In Martin Sheen, you have a president who is a regular guy, who can sit down with you and have a dri...
CHRISTOPHER SHARRETT In Martin Sheen, you have a president who is a regular guy, who can sit down with you and have a dri...
CHRISTOPHER SHARRETT Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake IDs.
DAN CASTELLANETA That's your average drink. A 5 ounce glass of wine, a 12 ounce beer or an ounce and a half of liquor...
LAURA STETSON Instinct's the iron skeleton under all our ideas of free will.
STEPHEN KING Be all that you can be.
You can be great.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA The FOP is a fine fraternal organization, but when it comes to negotiate a contract, we are the Team...
JIMMY NEAL I am your sire. I am to guide you through your first days as a vampire. Your first feeding is a rite...
MOLLY HARPER If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.
DAVID DAYE My voice? Yeah, well, I used to drink a lot of beer when I was a kid and I sounded like a drunk in a...
ERIC BURDON [Of course, some experts simply say] beer has become the boring drink. ... You aren't going to drink...
BOB LACHKY You have what others don't have. This is good news which means you can do what others can't do! You ...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Just get it right, “it is not too late to dream”. You can do it now! This very moment, I mean ri...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR [But have no fear, there will be beer - the 4-H Club will sell Amber Bock by Budweiser.] It's a dark...
GEORGE ROCKWELL I had to agree with one ex-boyfriend of one crackhead complainant who'd gone missing, when he told m...
EDWARD CONLON One of the things I do in my cookbooks is I will do a conversion from outdoor to indoor grilling so ...
SANDRA LEE I can see only three planets in the entire universe, namely Heaven, Earth and Me! Heaven shines its ...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR I'm a beer man. I tried to drink whiskey and Scotch, but I don't get it. It smells like a gi...
MADS MIKKELSEN I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.
HOMER SIMPSON Cover a war in a place where you can't drink beer or talk to a woman?
Hell no!"
HUNTER S. THOMPSON Knowing the question is more important than knowing the answer. It makes you curious, lets you think...
DEBASISH MRIDHA You can be all that you want to be.
Keep dreaming and reach out to your dreams.
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA You'll be okay. No matter what shape reality takes, you can handle it.
SHIRO AMANO drink beer. But that's kind of my goal pretty much wherever I go.
DAVE BARRY Take a chance of your life, you're risking nothing in this planet.
NAZIM AMBALATH It's easy, its international and it can be fairly anonymous.
ANDY FISHER We anticipate it will be a setting which might bring faculty, staff and students together for conver...
AMY CAMPBELL Did I think it was hypocritical that a professional league making hundreds of millions of dollars of...
JOSH GORDON The bird dares to break the shell, then the shell breaks open and the bird can fly openly. This is t...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world.
JACK NICHOLSON There is so much you are capable of doing, but you will never know until you try
SOTONYE ANGA I'm going to open a new Facebook account named 'Anonymous' so all the cool quotes will be attributed...
ANONYMOUS You cannot do anything unless you allow your passion to motivate you. People may tell you, "you can ...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR I think that anytime you can add another shot blocker to a team it improves your defense and lets yo...
CARROLL DAWSON Everything known and referred to as “impossible” is often what has not been attempted before. It...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Beer is not a good cocktail-party drink, especially in a home where you don't know where the bathroo...
BILLY CARTER We keep it as anonymous as we can.
DOUGLAS MURPHY Enemies who vow not to see you achieve it and friends who say you can't do it... ARE THE SAME...!!! ...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Drop down someone else's shoe and run to take your own quickly. Don't hire your own to anybody, else...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR It's always strange being a kid on the set, because you're treated like an equal when you...
NATALIE PORTMAN It is a small world. You do not have to live in it particuarly long to learn that for yourself. Ther...
NEIL GAIMAN I learned early to drink beer, wine and whiskey. And I think I was about 5 when I first chewed tobac...
BABE RUTH You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind o...
FRANK ZAPPA
More Anonymous
Animals are human just like us in a different shape and form so do not abuse them.
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS You don't have to touch someone to love them, It's not in the kiss, It's in the times you don't kiss...
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS Glory be to Him who changes others and remains Himself unchanged!
ANONYMOUS Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone one who loves is born of God an...
ANONYMOUS May the God who gives endurance and encouragement
give you a spirit of unity among yourselves ...
ANONYMOUS Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
ANONYMOUS Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can be...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what y...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
ANONYMOUS It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
ANONYMOUS He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
ANONYMOUS All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
ANONYMOUS A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do yo...
ANONYMOUS A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
ANONYMOUS Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
ANONYMOUS Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...b...
ANONYMOUS Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her o...
ANONYMOUS Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family d...
ANONYMOUS The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
ANONYMOUS Leadership is the ability to hide your panic from others.
ANONYMOUS An expert knows all the answers -- if you ask the right questions.
ANONYMOUS Time cuts down all, Both great and small.
ANONYMOUS Few cases of eyestrain have been developed by looking on the bright side of things.
ANONYMOUS Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Canaveral.
ANONYMOUS Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. •Anonymous Many an o...
ANONYMOUS Some of the smallest situations are the biggest to some people.
ANONYMOUS Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment; woman accepts it as a natural heritage.
ANONYMOUS Defeat may test you; it need not stop you. If at first you don't succeed, try another way. For eve...
ANONYMOUS Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
ANONYMOUS A friend is one to whom you can pour out the contents of your heart, chaff and grain alike. Knowin...
ANONYMOUS Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and u...
ANONYMOUS She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
ANONYMOUS many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting; but a ...
ANONYMOUS Lady Wisdom will be your close friend; and Brother Knowledge will be your pleasant companion.
ANONYMOUS When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
ANONYMOUS It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is possible only when one is busy. The body must toil, the mind must be occupied, and the ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like jam. You can't spread even a little without getting some on yourself.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the overcoming of not unknown obstacles toward a known goal.
ANONYMOUS Happiness seems to be the result of something happening — inactivity is not very exhilarating.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not pleasure, it's victory.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passe...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not given but exchanged.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes f...
ANONYMOUS If happiness could be brought, few of us could pay the price.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you turn your a...
ANONYMOUS So live that your memories will be part of your happiness.
ANONYMOUS Happiness consists in activity; such as the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not always measured in smiles.
ANONYMOUS Happiness lies in our own backyard, but it's probably well hidden by crabgrass.
ANONYMOUS Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
ANONYMOUS The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
ANONYMOUS Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle ...
ANONYMOUS Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
ANONYMOUS To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
ANONYMOUS My friend, why have you drifted so far away? All motion is relative, maybe it is you who have moved ...
ANONYMOUS The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pa...
ANONYMOUS Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
ANONYMOUS Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick.
ANONYMOUS When you laugh, be sure to laugh at what people do and not at what people are.
ANONYMOUS The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a cannon - but it's echo lasts a great deal longer.
ANONYMOUS Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding i...
ANONYMOUS A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
ANONYMOUS When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.
ANONYMOUS Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, ...
ANONYMOUS تبسمك في وجه أخيك صدقة، وأمرك بالمعروف صدقة ونهيك عن ال...
ANONYMOUS The first men to be created and formed were called the Sorcerer of Fatal Laughter, the Sorcerer of N...
ANONYMOUS Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...
ANONYMOUS And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
ANONYMOUS Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for ...
ANONYMOUS Anyone who is having troubles should pray. Anyone who is happy should sing praises. Anyone who is si...
ANONYMOUS I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.
ANONYMOUS Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
ANONYMOUS Store front sign: Entire store on sale, everything $1 or more.
ANONYMOUS If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.
ANONYMOUS Why didn't Bruce Willis play the lead role in Titanic? He would have saved everyone.
ANONYMOUS I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out?
ANONYMOUS My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!
ANONYMOUS If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters.
ANONYMOUS Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
ANONYMOUS It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too,...
ANONYMOUS One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less t...
ANONYMOUS The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
ANONYMOUS In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.
ANONYMOUS How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
ANONYMOUS The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
ANONYMOUS Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of...
ANONYMOUS Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I ...
ANONYMOUS Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits.
ANONYMOUS Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.
ANONYMOUS My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.
ANONYMOUS Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
ANONYMOUS As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
ANONYMOUS When the cop told me to give him my first name and last name I told him, 'Are you crazy? What's my ...
ANONYMOUS Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn.
ANONYMOUS What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
ANONYMOUS Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
ANONYMOUS Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
ANONYMOUS I bet you anything that I can stop gambling right now.
ANONYMOUS My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too ...
ANONYMOUS Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
ANONYMOUS I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:
Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.<...
ANONYMOUS Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time a...
ANONYMOUS He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this ...
ANONYMOUS I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition.
ANONYMOUS I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
ANONYMOUS Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!
ANONYMOUS I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
ANONYMOUS My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museu...
ANONYMOUS Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
ANONYMOUS I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
ANONYMOUS There was a robot invented in China that catches thieves. In Australia it caught 10 thieves, in Ame...
ANONYMOUS I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
ANONYMOUS How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone.
ANONYMOUS Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
ANONYMOUS After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23.
ANONYMOUS Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
ANONYMOUS I always mean what I say, I don't always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.
ANONYMOUS I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
ANONYMOUS Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
ANONYMOUS Never judge a book by it's movie
ANONYMOUS I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my ...
ANONYMOUS When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.
ANONYMOUS Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
ANONYMOUS If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your sm...
ANONYMOUS My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
ANONYMOUS I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
ANONYMOUS Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast...
ANONYMOUS I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close ...
ANONYMOUS Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted ...
ANONYMOUS Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.
ANONYMOUS Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
ANONYMOUS I'm not really a control freak, but... can I show the right way to do that?
ANONYMOUS A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
ANONYMOUS I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is.
ANONYMOUS Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
ANONYMOUS Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red!
ANONYMOUS Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing.
ANONYMOUS Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
ANONYMOUS I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
ANONYMOUS The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people al...
ANONYMOUS I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.
ANONYMOUS The amount of time it takes for a minute to go by is proportionally dependent with the distance to t...
ANONYMOUS Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to sco...
ANONYMOUS I can't wait for that to never happen.
ANONYMOUS I liked the movie Titanic, my favorite character was the iceberg.
ANONYMOUS Sports top moment: to score a goal but miss in the re-play.
ANONYMOUS Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
ANONYMOUS Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible.
ANONYMOUS An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
ANONYMOUS My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me."
ANONYMOUS Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face.
ANONYMOUS You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar.
ANONYMOUS Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.
ANONYMOUS It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase al...
ANONYMOUS If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patte...
ANONYMOUS Whenever you feel stupid, remember that there are people outside searching for Pokemon.
ANONYMOUS