Men want a lot of pals—and they don’t want people to get mad at them.

What is my definition of jazz? 'Safe sex of the highest order.

We could have saved the Earth but we were too damned cheap.

Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything.

I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.

We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are humane.