Mom, can I have some pie?


Eric Cartman

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You will respect my authori-tah!' Oberon said, in a passable imitation of Eric Cartman. I reminded h...
KEVIN HEARNE
Mom and apple pie
PROVERB
Statistics are to baseball what a flaky crust is to Mom's apple pie.
HARRY REASONER
Anyway Kenny, Yellow MegaMan is only $8.95, so maybe your mom can put it on layaway and make payment...
ERIC CARTMAN
Ok That's it, Talking Poo is where I draw the line.
ERIC CARTMAN
Screw you guys, I'm going home
ERIC CARTMAN
Yeah hippie, go back to Woodstock if you don't want to shoot anything.
ERIC CARTMAN
Hippies, hippies... they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and play frisbee!
ERIC CARTMAN
Hey, I ain't fat, I'm just big-boned.
ERIC CARTMAN
If some sissy chick tried to kick my ass I would say hey, missy, go knit me a sweater before I slap ...
ERIC CARTMAN
Well I looked in my moms closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an ultravibe pleasure 2000...
ERIC CARTMAN
Why does this happen every month? It seems like right about the same time every month, Kyle's mom ge...
ERIC CARTMAN
Kenny's family is so poor that yesterday, they had to put their cardboard box up for a second mortga...
ERIC CARTMAN
Too bad drinking scotch isn't a paying job or Kenny's dad would be a millionare!
ERIC CARTMAN
I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried something, I'd be like, HEY! You get your bitch ...
ERIC CARTMAN
I didn't want to do some trivial, lame, trite, sweetie-pie, 'How thin can I be?' role.
SHERILYN FENN
My mom always said I was the peacemaker in the family. My older brother, Eric, was the leader, the c...
GWEN STEFANI
Never say 'no' to pie. No matter what, wherever you are, diet-wise or whatever, you know wha...
AL ROKER
Mom would talk about Eric Sevareid and Murrow and Howard K. Smith the way other parents talk about s...
JOHN DICKERSON
I am so grateful. Eric was very loving, very kind, and what better legacy could Eric have?
MARY MOLNAR
We'll have to wait and see if Eric can take on the responsibility.
AL GALLAGHER
The man for me is the cherry on the pie. But I'm the pie and my pie is good all by itself. Even if I...
HALLE BERRY
The man for me is the cherry on the pie. But I'm the pie and my pie is good all by itself. Even ...
HALLE BERRY
When Eric sat out, I told myself I have to do more.
DERRICK BERRY
Hannibal Burress is my polar opposite in energy. I can be crazy, and he grounds the 'Eric Andre ...
ERIC ANDRE
Eric and Eddie have really done a lot for Brittany. She has just really blossomed. I thought Eric mi...
KATHY MCCAULEY
We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie.
DAVID MAMET
I am the most pious person in the room. Even though I have no pie - I have pizza, and what can be mo...
WILL ADVISE
I'm a sweet eater. I love lemon pie and sweet potato pie.
CLAUDE WILLIAMS
I'm a sweet eater. I love lemon pie and sweet potato pie.
CLAUDE WILLIAMS
I love Eric Clapton.
ALEJANDRO GONZALEZ INARRITU
The great thing about baking is that you can bring in an apple pie when you have company and say, &#...
JERRY HALL
We are shopping Eric. Obviously, we would much rather have Eric released. But if we can work out a t...
GREG JOHNSON
I think Mom just had it in the living room. We're going to have to do some research.
BILL WEST
On my show I share all these yummy, fattening recipes, but I tell people, in moderation, in moderati...
PAULA DEEN
Enjoy the challenges you face today, some people have none.
THOMAS FLAJNIK - ANTICHIMERAPODAL
I don't want some mom, whose son may have recently died, to see the commander in chief playing golf.
GEORGE W. BUSH
In order for American Pie to have worked, you have to have a character who, even while he is humping...
JASON BIGGS
I can never make up my mind if I'm happy being a flute player, or if I wish I were Eric Clapton.
IAN ANDERSON
You know, Eric, I could have sworn I heard a goat bleating while I was working in the slype yesterda...
CATHERINE AIRD
They didn't find any part of Eric for five months. I feel fortunate they did find some, so there is ...
BETTY BENNETT
I would forgive my mom, but she's going to have to admit she did some things that were wrong.
AARON CARTER
Having diabetes doesn't mean that you can never enjoy a piece of cake or pie. It does mean that you ...
SUSAN WALKER
Despite his young age, Eric has both leadership and experience that will definitely help our club. A...
BOB FERGUSON
I can never make up my mind if I'm happy being a flute player, or if I wish I were Eric Clapton.
IAN ANDERSON
How about this?' Simmon asked me. "Which is worse, stealing a pie or killing Ambrose?"
I gave i...
PATRICK ROTHFUSS
My mom makes something called green pie, which I thought was a delicacy that many people only had at...
BOBBY MOYNIHAN
There's this big pie in show business, and you physically can't eat the whole pie. If you give every...
JAY LENO
You'll have pie in the sky when you die
JOE HILL
My mom and I have always been there for each other. We had some tough times, but she was always ther...
LEBRON JAMES
We have been careless with our pie repertoire. The demise of apple-pear pie with figs and saffron an...
JANET CLARKSON
The mighty hunter,” I quipped as we snuck out the backdoor, escaping into the yard. “He can take...
JULIE KAGAWA
I'm so vain, all I could think was I should have stopped at 'American Pie.'
JENNIFER COOLIDGE
Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind. -Eric Hoffer.
ERIC HOFFER
We can't all be bakers or chefs. Many of us have modest ambitions. But we can all buy a piece of the...
AMAH LAMBERT
It has sustained us. A lot of them care about Eric. I think it has held us up. They have given us so...
BETH EDMUNDSON
...But also because I find I really do…" He paused, as if he were about to say something outrageou...
CHARLAINE HARRIS
There were little triangles of coconut custard pie on a graham cracker crust for dessert, the best a...
JOE HILL
Unlike some politicians, I can admit to a mistake.
NELSON MANDELA
You can't carve up the world. It's not a pie.
PATTI SMITH
All roads lead to 'American Pie.' 'As American as apple pie' was the saying. It was ...
DON MCLEAN
Eric: ''What part do you like best?'' Sookie: ''oh your butt'' Eric: ''My...Bottom?'' Sookie: ''yep
CHARLAINE HARRIS
I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying tr...
JOHN GREEN
My mom just understands about stuff. We have a really good trust, and she knows I can take care of m...
BALTHAZAR GETTY
India does not have a problem of people grabbing share from a fixed pie. India is one of the few nat...
ARUNDHATI BHATTACHARYA
I told Eric that before he could win five he had to win four. If (Zach) can stay injury-free, I feel...
RON SANDERS
I'm as American as apple pie.
PAUL MOONEY
I think 'American Pie' is great.
PAUL DANO
I make a bad mom, but I can pull off a crazy aunt.
ILONA ANDREWS
When I can 10 or 11, my mom was the one out there catching passes for me. She was my prime receiver.
JOE THEISMANN
A lot of people knew who Eric was. You didn't go in Casey's and not know Eric.
ANNE REEVES
Unless you're an avid pie maker you don't really need 20 pie plates.
BARRY IZSAK
...and so many orchards circled the village that on some crisp October afternoons the whole wold sme...
ALICE HOFFMAN
You can't imagine what satisfaction can be gotten from throwing a pie into someone's face.
EMMA THOMPSON
I understand some women don't have a choice. I'm just lucky that I do. To me, there is no job more i...
SHANNAN APRILE
People who don't see you every day have a hard time understanding how on some days--good days--you c...
JENNIFER STARZEC
I hurt with you. I bled with you - not only because we're bonded but because of the love I have for ...
CHARLAINE HARRIS
I want it to get rebuilt so my mom can live there.
CHAZ FONTENTOT
That's my style. I learned that from [Dodgers closer] Eric Gagne.
GUILLERMO MOTA
One day I went up to my mom and I said, 'Mom, can I have permission to build a 2.3-million elect...
MICHIO KAKU
I felt like a car that had only been operated by one driver… a car its new prospective buyer was d...
CHARLAINE HARRIS
Though I was standing in front of a mirror, I wasn't really seeing my reflection. I was seeing, very...
CHARLAINE HARRIS
As the water pounded on my back, I reflected that I must be pretty simple. It didn't take much to ma...
CHARLAINE HARRIS
There are some things I wish I never knew, but I am grateful for things that I have learned, too.
A. J. COOK
I was very pleased. I'm sure Eric feels good about what he did. He had a little extra on his fastbal...
WAYNE KRIVSKY
Modern-Day Parenting is no joke. For starters, no one takes you seriously unless you have a fancy pa...
JUDY BALAN
You can wipe out a workout with a glass of milk and a piece of pie.
JOE DONNELLY
When I look at a pie chart, I just go numb.
AARON KOBLIN
I'm from Maine. I eat apple pie for breakfast.
RACHEL NICHOLS
Ariel: “Eric!”
Eric: “Do not sing me back to shore! Not until you are standing on two fee...
KHALIA N. HADES
We're known for our lime, our citrus. We are the citrus state. We should have a citrus Key lime pie....
LISA ROTH
I did not make a pie,” Alec repeated, gesturing expressively with one hand, “for three reasons. ...
CASSANDRA CLARE
Since I've been here a long time, I forget. I can speak it, but sometimes I have to go to my mom and...
DANIEL ANAYA
The event will have a violinist performing as well as Eric Morris, a gospel singer.
PAT ALLEN
My mom is so special to me. I love her more than I can think
OSCAR AULIQ-ICE
My mom is so special to me. I love her more than I can think
AULIQ-ICE
Instead, I have an abundance mentality: When people are genuinely happy at the successes of others, ...
STEPHEN COVEY
Lord, you're Irish," said Will. "Can you make things that don't have potatoes in them? We had an Iri...
CASSANDRA CLARE
Performance-wise this was an outstanding meet in many events. Eric had some really big jumps. He mad...
CHARLIE HUGHES
As a global sport, we can afford to have pockets of strength and relative evenness, without really a...
RICHARD DAVIES

More Eric Cartman

Anyway Kenny, Yellow MegaMan is only $8.95, so maybe your mom can put it on layaway and make payment...
ERIC CARTMAN
Ok That's it, Talking Poo is where I draw the line.
ERIC CARTMAN
Screw you guys, I'm going home
ERIC CARTMAN
Yeah hippie, go back to Woodstock if you don't want to shoot anything.
ERIC CARTMAN
Hippies, hippies... they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and play frisbee!
ERIC CARTMAN
Hey, I ain't fat, I'm just big-boned.
ERIC CARTMAN
If some sissy chick tried to kick my ass I would say hey, missy, go knit me a sweater before I slap ...
ERIC CARTMAN
Well I looked in my moms closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an ultravibe pleasure 2000...
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Why does this happen every month? It seems like right about the same time every month, Kyle's mom ge...
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Kenny's family is so poor that yesterday, they had to put their cardboard box up for a second mortga...
ERIC CARTMAN
Too bad drinking scotch isn't a paying job or Kenny's dad would be a millionare!
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I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried something, I'd be like, HEY! You get your bitch ...
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If you think you can do it, you can.
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Win as if you were used to it, lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.
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A decision without the pressure of consequence is hardly a decision at all.
ERIC LANGMUIR.
When being dishonest, people can still tell the truth. Be mindful of the treacherous that do not lie...
ERIC PARSLOW
Those in possession of absolute power can not only prophesy and make their prophecies come true, but...
ERIC HOFFER
We lie loudest when we lie to ourselves.
ERIC HOFFER
Absolute faith corrupts as absolutely as absolute power.
ERIC HOFFER
There is no such thing as a lack of faith. We all have plenty of faith, it's just that we have faith...
ERIC BUTTERWORTH
They who lack talent expect things to happen without effort. They ascribe failure to a lack of inspi...
ERIC HOFFER
There is no loneliness greater than the loneliness of a failure. The failure is a stranger in his ow...
ERIC HOFFER
Facts are counterrevolutionary.
ERIC HOFFER
Where you are in consciousness has everything to do with what you see in experience.
ERIC BUTTERWORTH
Substantive abandonment of convention is evidence of mastery.
ERIC PARSLOW
It is remarkable by how much a pinch of malice enhances the penetrating power of an idea or an opini...
ERIC HOFFER
A great man's greatest good luck is to die at the right time.
ERIC HOFFER
Man was nature's mistake --she neglected to finish him -- and she has never ceased paying for her mi...
ERIC HOFFER
Truth and honesty are quite different. What a person believes to be true always follows when honesty...
ERIC PARSLOW
The game of history is usually played by the best and the worst over the heads of the majority in th...
ERIC HOFFER
It is by its promise of a sense of power that evil often attracts the weak.
ERIC HOFFER
Evil, and evil spirits, devils and devil possession, are the outgrowth of man's inadequate conscious...
ERIC BUTTERWORTH
The one thing that a fish can never find is water; and the one thing that man can never find is God.
ERIC BUTTERWORTH
God can only do for you what He can do through you.
ERIC BUTTERWORTH
Fundamentalists believe Jesus was God becoming man. I believe that Jesus was man becoming God.
ERIC BUTTERWORTH
You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.
ERIC HOFFER
Fear comes from uncertainty. When we are absolutely certain, whether of our worth or worthlessness, ...
ERIC HOFFER
The birth of the new constitutes a crisis, and its mastery calls for a crude and simple cast of mind...
ERIC HOFFER
To the old, the new is usually bad news.
ERIC HOFFER
The fear of becoming a 'has-been' keeps some people from becoming anything.
ERIC HOFFER
There is sublime thieving in all giving. Someone gives us all he has and we are his.
ERIC HOFFER
Our present addiction to pollsters and forecasters is a symptom of our chronic uncertainty about the...
ERIC HOFFER
To make of human affairs a coherent, precise, predictable whole one must ignore or suppress man as h...
ERIC HOFFER
The basic test of freedom is perhaps less in what we are free to do than in what we are free not to ...
ERIC HOFFER
There can be no real freedom without the freedom to fail.
ERIC HOFFER