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One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it.


Mae West

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VICTOR BORGE

More Mae West

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
MAE WEST I always say, keep a diary and someday it'll keep you.
MAE WEST Keep a diary, and someday it'll keep you.
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
MAE WEST Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but no sale at the box office.
MAE WEST I never loved another person the way I loved myself.
MAE WEST A man in love is like a clipped coupon -- it's time to cash in.
MAE WEST It's not the men in my life that counts, it's the life in my men.
MAE WEST When women go wrong, men go right after them. -Mae West.
MAE WEST Men are my hobby, if I ever got married I'd have to give it up.
MAE WEST So many men, so little time.
MAE WEST Women are as old as they feel and men are old when they lose their feelings.
MAE WEST When women go wrong, men go right after them.
MAE WEST It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean.
MAE WEST I believe that it's better to be looked over than it is to be overlooked.
MAE WEST Ladies who play with fire must remember that smoke gets in their eyes.
MAE WEST I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.
MAE WEST Marriage is a fine institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
MAE WEST He who hesitates is last.
MAE WEST Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.
MAE WEST Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
MAE WEST Sex is an emotion in motion.
MAE WEST Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
MAE WEST His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.
MAE WEST I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.
MAE WEST He who hesitates is a damned fool.
MAE WEST Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere.
MAE WEST I'm single because I was born that way.
MAE WEST I only like two kinds of men; domestic and foreign.
MAE WEST I go for two kinds of men. The kind with muscles, and the kind without.
MAE WEST A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.
MAE WEST My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you're boned,...
MAE WEST When you get the personality, you don't need the nudity.
MAE WEST It ain't sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
MAE WEST Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right now ju...
MAE WEST When I have to choose between two evils, I always try to pick the one I haven't tried before.
MAE WEST Goodness had nothing to do with it, dearie.
MAE WEST You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
MAE WEST It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
MAE WEST My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you're boned,...
MAE WEST There are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.
MAE WEST Keep a diary, and someday it'll keep you.
MAE WEST The best way to learn to be a lady is to see how other ladies do it.
MAE WEST I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.
MAE WEST I wrote the story myself. It's all about a girl who lost her reputation but never missed it.
MAE WEST You're never too old to become younger
MAE WEST Nobody dies from lack of sex. It's lack of love we die from.
MAE WEST Sex is an emotion in motion
MAE WEST It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
MAE WEST Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.
MAE WEST I speak two languages, Body and English.
MAE WEST You are doing your best only when you are trying to improve what you are doing
MAE WEST The best way to behave is to misbehave.
MAE WEST The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
MAE WEST You can do what you want, but saving love doesn't bring any interest.
MAE WEST A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.
MAE WEST When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
MAE WEST You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, ...
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it
MAE WEST To err is human - but it feels divine
MAE WEST An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.
MAE WEST There are no good girls gone wrong - just bad girls found out.
MAE WEST Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.
MAE WEST I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
MAE WEST Men are all alike--except the one you've met who's different.
MAE WEST Men are easy to get but hard to keep.
MAE WEST Few men know how to kiss well. Fortunately, I've always had time to teach them.
MAE WEST Kiss and make up--but too much makeup has ruined many a kiss.
MAE WEST I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself
MAE WEST It's not what I do, but the way I do it. It's not what I say, but the way I say it.
MAE WEST When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
MAE WEST Dating should be less about matching outward circumstances than meeting your inner necessity.
MAE WEST Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
MAE WEST Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
MAE WEST When I'm good, I'm very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
MAE WEST Say what you want about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
MAE WEST All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
MAE WEST Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right no...
MAE WEST Sex is emotion in motion.
MAE WEST A man's kiss is his signature.
MAE WEST Personality is the glitter that sends your little gleam across the footlights and the orchestra pit ...
MAE WEST Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
MAE WEST I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
MAE WEST I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing can be taxing.
MAE WEST She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!
MAE WEST You are never too old to become younger!
MAE WEST Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
MAE WEST If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.
MAE WEST A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.
MAE WEST When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
MAE WEST I used to be Snow White -- but I drifted.
MAE WEST A man in the house is worth two on the street.
MAE WEST I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.
MAE WEST A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
MAE WEST I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them.
MAE WEST Love thy neighbor - and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much eas...
MAE WEST Women with pasts interest men... they hope history will repeat itself.
MAE WEST Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
MAE WEST Saving love doesn't bring any interest.
MAE WEST 'Why don't you come up sometime 'n see me? I'm home every evening.... Come up. I'll tell your fortun...
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but no sales at the box office.
MAE WEST You're never too old to become younger.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing is wonderful.
MAE WEST Don't cry for a man who's left you, the next one may fall for your smile.
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
MAE WEST Love isn't an emotion or an instinct--it's an art.
MAE WEST I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.
MAE WEST It takes two to get one in trouble.
MAE WEST An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away
MAE WEST Women with "pasts" interest men because men hope that history will repeat itself.
MAE WEST Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but has no sale at the box office.
MAE WEST His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork
MAE WEST Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.
MAE WEST Love thy neighbor -- and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much ea...
MAE WEST It's not what you can do, but the way you do it that counts.
MAE WEST A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.
MAE WEST Cultivate your curves--they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
MAE WEST Look your best--who said love is blind?
MAE WEST You may admire a girl's curves on the first introduction, but the second meeting shows up new angles...
MAE WEST I like a man who's good, but not too good--for the good die young, and I hate a dead one.
MAE WEST Oh, Miss West, I've heard so much about you. Mae West: Yeah, honey, but you can't prove a thing.
MAE WEST To err is human, but it feels divine.
MAE WEST A man has more character in his face at forty than at twenty--he has suffered longer.
MAE WEST I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.
MAE WEST I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
MAE WEST I've been in more laps than a napkin.
MAE WEST Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
MAE WEST It's not the men in your life that matters, it's the life in your men.
MAE WEST To err is human - but it feels divine.
MAE WEST It's all right for a perfect stranger to kiss your hand as long as he's perfect.
MAE WEST Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else
MAE WEST Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
MAE WEST Loves conquers all things except poverty and toothache. -Mae West.
MAE WEST It ain't sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
MAE WEST Flattery will get you everywhere.
MAE WEST Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
MAE WEST Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else.
MAE WEST The best way to find your perfect match is to meet love halfway.
MAE WEST Don't marry a man to reform him--that's what reform schools are for.
MAE WEST When I'm good I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.
MAE WEST Girls, give all your gentlemen friends an even break, even if you have to break them in the attempt.
MAE WEST I'm no angel, but I've spread my wings a bit.
MAE WEST Love thy neighbor--and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easi...
MAE WEST Some women pick men to marry--and others pick them to pieces.
MAE WEST I've been in more laps than a napkin.
MAE WEST Too many girls follow the line of least resistance--but a good line is hard to resist.
MAE WEST There are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
MAE WEST Loves conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
MAE WEST It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do...
MAE WEST I don't know a lot about politics, but I can recognise a good party man when I see one
MAE WEST Personally, I like two types of men--domestic and foreign.
MAE WEST He's the kind of man who picks his friends...to pieces.
MAE WEST When choosing between two evils, I always like to take the one I've never tried before
MAE WEST You ain't no oil paintin' but you are a fascinatin' monster.
MAE WEST I was Snow White but I drifted.
MAE WEST [Per Alexander Pope (1734):] Vice is a monster of so frightful mien/As to be hated, needs but to be ...
MAE WEST [Nov. 30-Dec. 10:] Dirty Blonde ... I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.
MAE WEST Women want certain things in marriage--the right to a title and a front seat in the lap of luxury.
MAE WEST Some men are all right in their place--if they only knew the right places!
MAE WEST Success is a two-bladed golden sword; it knights one and stabs one at the same time.
MAE WEST (During a trial in which she was accused of indecency on stage)Judge: 'Miss West, are you trying to ...
MAE WEST Men? Sure, I've known lots of them. But I never found one I liked well enough to marry. Besides, I'v...
MAE WEST Volunteer activities can foster enormous leadership skills. The non professional volunteer world is ...
MAE WEST Life's just a merry-go-round. Come on up. You might get a brass ring.
MAE WEST Let men see what's coming to them, and women will get what's coming to them.
MAE WEST Ohhhhh! I feel like a million but, I'll take'em one at a time!
MAE WEST I've been doing a lot of thinking about you lately. Mae West, You must be awful tired.
MAE WEST I'd give half my life for just one kiss. Mae West: Then kiss me twice.
MAE WEST I only like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
MAE WEST I believe in the single standard for men and women.
MAE WEST I believe in censorship. After all, I made a fortune out of it.
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but no box office.
MAE WEST A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him two--that's subtraction.
MAE WEST I'm tired, send one of them home
MAE WEST Give a man a free hand and he'll try to put it all over you.
MAE WEST Do not marry a man to reform him. That is what reform schools are for.
MAE WEST Whenever I have to choose between two evils, I always like to try the one I haven't tried before.
MAE WEST I can always tell a lady when I see one. Yeah? What do you tell 'em?
MAE WEST I always say, keep a diary, and some day it'll keep you.
MAE WEST No gold-digging for me... I take diamonds! We may be off the gold standard someday.
MAE WEST A man in the house is worth two in the street.
MAE WEST I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.
MAE WEST Don't come crawlin' to a man for love--he likes to get a run for his money.
MAE WEST A man's kiss is his signature.
MAE WEST Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
MAE WEST I've been rich and I've been poor. Believe me, rich is better.
MAE WEST I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number of carats in a diamond.
MAE WEST The score never interested me, only the game.
MAE WEST The curve is more powerful than the sword.
MAE WEST Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
MAE WEST Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.
MAE WEST He who hesitates is last
MAE WEST Experience is by far the best teacher. You know, ever since I was a little girl I knew that if you l...
MAE WEST I take it out in the open and laugh at it.
MAE WEST