Only once in a generation does anything as fresh as a vomiting detective come along.

I'm not much for parties. Sometimes you have to wear a funny hat, sometimes they expect you to eat sushi, which is like eating bait. And there's always some totally drunk girl who thinks you're smitten by her, when what you're really wondering is if she'll vomit on your shirt or instead on your shoes.

In memory, she lived and moved and laughed, but all that a photograph could offer was one frozen moment of a life.

I never knew whether I was drawn to eccentric people or if they were drawn to me.

Everything barbarians do is nothing, no matter how loudly they insist it's something.

Patterns exist in our seemingly patternless lives, and the most common pattern is the circle.