The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.
Woody Allen
Related
Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
WOODY ALLEN What's the difference between sex and love? I have four wives and five kids. I apparently don't know...
JAMES CAAN The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot ...
RODNEY DANGERFIELD The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot ...
BRENDAN BEHAN What's the difference between sex and love? I have four wives and five kids. I apparently don...
JAMES CAAN Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.
HUNTER S. THOMPSON Love and sex can go together and sex and unlove can go together and love and unsex can go together. ...
ANDY WARHOL When it comes to life and love, why do we believe our worst reviews?
SARAH JESSICA PARKER It's a misconception that love can only foster between two people of opposite sex. Love is a bon...
RANDEEP HOODA In the vagina of every girl there is a sleeping snake waiting for the magic music that will bring th...
CHLOE THURLOW Men who are too good looking are never good in bed because they never had to be.
SARAH JESSICA PARKER I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES America does not know the difference between money and sex. It treats sex like money because it trea...
PETER KREEFT I think Woody Allen is Woody Allen, and no matter where he goes he still makes his Woody Allen films...
ABBAS KIAROSTAMI Sex is like washing your face - just something you do because you have to. Sex without love is absol...
SOPHIA LOREN Don't expect love to do the work of sex and sex to do the work of love.
RAM SIVABALAN Sex is a thing, love is everything.
ARZUM UZUN Sex without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
WOODY ALLEN Sex is funny and love is serious.
STEPHAN JENKINS it's a sex object if you're pretty and no love or love and no sex if you're fat
NIKKI GIOVANNI What's the difference between the music of my generation and today s. Our songs were about Love and ...
DAVID A. VIGILANTI Cricket is like sex films - they relieve frustration and tension.
LINDA LOVELACE Men often give love for sex, women often give sex for love.
SOURCE UNKNOWN Greg had told me on the ride over that there was another organisation called SLAA, which stood for S...
DREW NELLINS SMITH I make mistakes. That's what I do. I
speak without thinking, I act without
knowing. I d...
CANDACE BUSHNELL The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to m...
WOODY ALLEN I love to sing. Mostly about love and sex.
ELIZABETH BERKLEY I don't think she's a lesbian. I think she just ran out of men. [Charlotte]
SEX AND THE CITY Puberty is a phase... fifteen years of rejection is a lifestyle. [Stanford]
SEX AND THE CITY Oh my God, she's fashion road-kill!
SEX AND THE CITY I love you, but I love myself more.
SEX AND THE CITY Maybe mistakes are what make our fate... without them what would shape our lives? Maybe if we had ne...
SEX AND THE CITY Desperate Housewives.
SEX AND THE CITY Sean (while ice-skating with Carrie): I'm guessing it's easier to balance when you're not smoking.Ca...
SEX AND THE CITY I want you to look at me, connect with me. This is lovemaking, it's not a porno flick. [Maria]
SEX AND THE CITY I once was broken up with by a guy's doorman. 'I'm sorry Ms. Hobbes, Jonathan won't be coming down. ...
SEX AND THE CITY It's a slippery slope, Carrie. Without boundaries you never know what might happen. [Miranda]
SEX AND THE CITY the sort of person who'd back Proposition 14.
SEX AND THE CITY A stud is born! [Stanford]
SEX AND THE CITY Maybe we should get married.[Charlotte] Alrighty.[Trey]
SEX AND THE CITY My Zen teacher also said: the only way to true happiness is to live in the moment and not worry abou...
SEX AND THE CITY Homeless to Harvard: The Liz Murray Story.
SEX AND THE CITY No lady likes to dance or dine, accompanied by a porcupine. Burma Shave.
SEX AND THE CITY What's the big mystery? It's my vagina, not the sphinx! [Miranda]
SEX AND THE CITY the lights fade to black.
SEX AND THE CITY Yeah, I would love to. I don't know if I'd do another singing one.
SEX AND THE CITY Bellhop: "this is a non-smoking floor."Carrie: "I have an addiction sir!"
SEX AND THE CITY F*** me badly once, shame on you. F*** me badly twice, shame on me.
SEX AND THE CITY Hasty Pudding is no small potatoes (sorry to mix the food references), known for its famous alumni a...
SEX AND THE CITY I knew I wanted a handbag, but they were so pricey. I love Marc Jacobs.
SEX AND THE CITY All other documents in the Getty's possession that could in any way be relevant to the Italian inves...
SEX AND THE CITY 'Rome' vital to HBO TV empire.
SEX AND THE CITY Sex and the City.
SEX AND THE CITY Suicide is not glamorous and should not be portrayed in a glamorous light.
SEX AND THE CITY When an opportunity comes, I don't question it. I grab it, drop its ring on the nightstand and swing...
SEX AND THE CITY Having money isn't the answer but it makes your life a hell of a lot nicer. If you have the choice t...
SEX AND THE CITY Despite the fact that there are over eight million people on the island of Manhattan, there are time...
SEX AND THE CITY When Charlotte really liked somebody she said their whole name. It helped her picture their future m...
SEX AND THE CITY I love you but it's not my job to fix your finances. [Charlotte]
SEX AND THE CITY It took me a really long time to get here, but I'm here. Carrie, you're the one. [Mr.Big]
SEX AND THE CITY Life is not all about sex. [Samantha]
SEX AND THE CITY When Charles Dickens wrote "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times," I believe he must ...
SEX AND THE CITY From my experience, honey, if he seems too good to be true—he probably is. [Samantha]
SEX AND THE CITY Fear knocked at the door. Faith answered. There was no one there.
SEX AND THE CITY Maybe all men are a drug. Sometimes they bring you down and sometimes, like now, they get you so hig...
SEX AND THE CITY My character, she's kind of gotten away with her looks, gotten away with her ability to charm people...
SEX AND THE CITY I admit it's tempting to wish for the perfect boss - the perfect parent - or the perfect outfit. But...
SEX AND THE CITY Charlotte: So how are you?
Carrie: I'm good. How are you?
Charlotte: Great.
Carrie: I to...
SEX AND THE CITY I had often fantasized about running into my ex and his wife. But in those fantasies, I was running ...
SEX AND THE CITY From my experience, honey, if he seems too good to be truehe probably is. [Samantha]
SEX AND THE CITY I'm thinking balls are to men what purses are to women. It's just a little bag, but we feel naked in...
SEX AND THE CITY They practically chased me with torches like I was Fuckenstein! [Samantha]
SEX AND THE CITY Middle-Age Girls Gone Wild.
SEX AND THE CITY You in a threesome? You won't even wear a thong! [Samantha]
SEX AND THE CITY The only thing worse than a liar is a bad liar. [Lucy Liu]
SEX AND THE CITY It's my birthday. I'm officially old. [Carrie on her 35th Birthday]
SEX AND THE CITY You men have no idea what we're dealing with down there. Teeth placement, and jaw stress, and suctio...
SEX AND THE CITY But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with your...
SEX AND THE CITY Junkyard Wars.
SEX AND THE CITY Kitchen
SEX AND THE CITY Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely ...
SEX AND THE CITY You shouldn't have to sacrifice who you are just because somebody else has a problem with it.
SEX AND THE CITY I don't believe in the Republican party or the Democratic party. I just believe in parties. [Samanth...
SEX AND THE CITY I’ve done the merry-go-round, I’ve been through the revolving doors, I feel like I’ve met some...
SEX AND THE CITY There are no available men in their thirties in New York. Giuliani had them removed along with the h...
SEX AND THE CITY Men in their forties are like the New York Times Sunday crossword puzzle: tricky, complicated, and y...
SEX AND THE CITY You wouldn't commit to a nice guy, given the option? [Carrie] I can't even commit to a long distance...
SEX AND THE CITY She can reach me, but I can't ever get her. [Big]
SEX AND THE CITY The Brady Bunch: The Complete Fourth Season
SEX AND THE CITY Everybody wonders what happens after you die[Carrie] I'm too busy wondering who's dinging my car in ...
SEX AND THE CITY Beverly Hills Cop II.
SEX AND THE CITY It's not the beef, Henry. It's the last 23 years!
SEX AND THE CITY I will never be the woman with the perfect hair, who can wear white and not spill on it.
SEX AND THE CITY Hi, Mrs. Collier. I'm a Jew now. How are you? [Charlotte]
SEX AND THE CITY Ray.
SEX AND THE CITY There was so much skin, it was like a shar-pei![Charlotte]
SEX AND THE CITY I don't know what's going to happen to this street. Fairfax is not what it used to be.
SEX AND THE CITY Really wanted a little baby to love, though not, obviously, weekend nanny to shag ex-husband.
SEX AND THE CITY Lord of the Strings.
SEX AND THE CITY The only one who should have to pay for a bad relationship is the person in your next relationship. ...
SEX AND THE CITY
More Woody Allen
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
WOODY ALLEN Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of meat and pot...
WOODY ALLEN I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
WOODY ALLEN If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very in...
WOODY ALLEN What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
WOODY ALLEN What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
WOODY ALLEN There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman...
WOODY ALLEN God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. . . I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
WOODY ALLEN The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to m...
WOODY ALLEN There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and w...
WOODY ALLEN Sex is nature's way of saying 'Hi!'
WOODY ALLEN Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any
WOODY ALLEN sex is simple, love stings afterwards.
WOODY ALLEN If it wasn't for dogs, some people would never go for a walk.
WOODY ALLEN I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.
WOODY ALLEN Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
WOODY ALLEN Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.
WOODY ALLEN I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
WOODY ALLEN Due to current economic conditions the light
at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
WOODY ALLEN What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jum...
WOODY ALLEN You know the speed of light; so what is the speed of dark?
WOODY ALLEN You're born free, then you're taxed to death.
WOODY ALLEN It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
WOODY ALLEN The decision to decide is a decision in itself.
WOODY ALLEN One small decision can change your life! That's why I always let someone else make my decisions, tha...
WOODY ALLEN Growing up is amazing, until you get old!
WOODY ALLEN All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white...
WOODY ALLEN If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me!
WOODY ALLEN I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.
WOODY ALLEN Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.
WOODY ALLEN I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.
WOODY ALLEN I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me.
WOODY ALLEN In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Th...
WOODY ALLEN Life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
WOODY ALLEN A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
WOODY ALLEN Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that y...
WOODY ALLEN Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought -...
WOODY ALLEN If you don't fail now and again, it's a sign you're playing it safe.
WOODY ALLEN In perpetrating a revolution, there are two requirements: someone or something to revolt against and...
WOODY ALLEN My one regret in life is that I'm not someone else.
WOODY ALLEN Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
WOODY ALLEN It shows exactly what you can do if you're a total psychotic.
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final. You know, I looked...
WOODY ALLEN For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermu...
WOODY ALLEN Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she would come in and sink my boats.
WOODY ALLEN The lion and the calf will lay down together, but the calf won't get much sleep..
WOODY ALLEN Marriage is the death of hope.
WOODY ALLEN Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.
WOODY ALLEN I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I have a tendency to... if I get too mellow, I...
WOODY ALLEN I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN I am at two with nature.
WOODY ALLEN Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
WOODY ALLEN If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
WOODY ALLEN I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily as lying down.
WOODY ALLEN I don't believe in an after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
WOODY ALLEN It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the ba...
WOODY ALLEN I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead.
WOODY ALLEN In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
WOODY ALLEN If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
WOODY ALLEN Capital punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior to ...
WOODY ALLEN More than at any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and ut...
WOODY ALLEN A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. An...
WOODY ALLEN Eighty percent of success is showing up.
WOODY ALLEN What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy...
WOODY ALLEN I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
WOODY ALLEN Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
WOODY ALLEN Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exc...
WOODY ALLEN A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.
WOODY ALLEN It is no secret that organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year. This is ...
WOODY ALLEN I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
WOODY ALLEN I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me
WOODY ALLEN To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. ...
WOODY ALLEN Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
WOODY ALLEN Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex an...
WOODY ALLEN What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
WOODY ALLEN How to make God laugh: Tell him your future plans.
WOODY ALLEN Innovation is the ability to see change as an opportunity - not a threat
WOODY ALLEN Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
WOODY ALLEN Eternity is really long, especially near the end
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.
WOODY ALLEN Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
WOODY ALLEN If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take tw...
WOODY ALLEN Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions
WOODY ALLEN A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times; her intelligence, eight ...
WOODY ALLEN The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.
WOODY ALLEN The best way to find your perfect match is to meet love halfway.
WOODY ALLEN There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem t...
WOODY ALLEN Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on offi...
WOODY ALLEN To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
WOODY ALLEN Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they f...
WOODY ALLEN Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
WOODY ALLEN Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
WOODY ALLEN I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
WOODY ALLEN It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad o...
WOODY ALLEN Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
WOODY ALLEN Some guy hit my fender the other day, and I said unto him, 'Be fruitful, and multiply'. But not in t...
WOODY ALLEN Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
WOODY ALLEN To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
WOODY ALLEN I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to fin...
WOODY ALLEN I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.
WOODY ALLEN He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.
WOODY ALLEN Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty da...
WOODY ALLEN Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boa...
WOODY ALLEN As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure ou...
WOODY ALLEN In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
WOODY ALLEN The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't h...
WOODY ALLEN I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
WOODY ALLEN I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
WOODY ALLEN I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.
WOODY ALLEN Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.
WOODY ALLEN My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make fi...
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the bo...
WOODY ALLEN It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife
WOODY ALLEN If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job
WOODY ALLEN It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
WOODY ALLEN Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence, so why bother shaving?
WOODY ALLEN Whosover loveth wisdom is righteous, but he that keepeth company with fowl is weird.
WOODY ALLEN The wicked at heart probably know something.
WOODY ALLEN My Lord, my Lord! What hast Thou done, lately?
WOODY ALLEN Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
WOODY ALLEN If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job.
WOODY ALLEN Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead- not sick, not wounded - dead.
WOODY ALLEN For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath ...
WOODY ALLEN We were married by a reformed rabbi in Long Island. A very reformed rabbi. A Nazi.
WOODY ALLEN The only difference between sex and death is, with death you can do it alone and nobody's going to m...
WOODY ALLEN Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.
WOODY ALLEN My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
WOODY ALLEN It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat...
WOODY ALLEN It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
WOODY ALLEN Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought--...
WOODY ALLEN If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.
WOODY ALLEN If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say ab...
WOODY ALLEN I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way aroun...
WOODY ALLEN I took a speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
WOODY ALLEN I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.
WOODY ALLEN How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?
WOODY ALLEN How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typ...
WOODY ALLEN His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
WOODY ALLEN Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
WOODY ALLEN As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree' -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to g...
WOODY ALLEN Death doesn't really worry me that much, I'm not frightened about it... I just don't want to be ther...
WOODY ALLEN More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter...
WOODY ALLEN You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundre...
WOODY ALLEN Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
WOODY ALLEN When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
WOODY ALLEN Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverag...
WOODY ALLEN The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5'7", it is impossible to get y...
WOODY ALLEN Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
WOODY ALLEN On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.
WOODY ALLEN Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.
WOODY ALLEN My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
WOODY ALLEN Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
WOODY ALLEN Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
WOODY ALLEN A ''Bay Area Bisexual'' told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
WOODY ALLEN Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declare...
WOODY ALLEN The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.
WOODY ALLEN Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
WOODY ALLEN I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving dishes for Chinese restaurants
WOODY ALLEN I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
WOODY ALLEN Everytime I hear Wagner I feel like invading Poland.
WOODY ALLEN She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could ca...
WOODY ALLEN My brain? That´s my second favourite organ.
WOODY ALLEN I think any boycott is wrong, ... Boycotts were exactly what the Germans were doing against the Jews...
WOODY ALLEN Psychoanalyses is like music lessons, for 5 years you do not notice any progress and suddenly you ca...
WOODY ALLEN Having sex is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
WOODY ALLEN As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to ge...
WOODY ALLEN Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
WOODY ALLEN There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says...
WOODY ALLEN I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horr...
WOODY ALLEN If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.
WOODY ALLEN I like the rain. It washes memories off the sidewalk of life.
WOODY ALLEN It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones
slept better, [Cloquet...
WOODY ALLEN Subjectivity is objective.
WOODY ALLEN The most expensive sex is free sex
WOODY ALLEN These modern analysts! They charge so much. In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you....
WOODY ALLEN It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blow...
WOODY ALLEN We laughed over it, and Hemingway punched me in the mouth.
WOODY ALLEN I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot
WOODY ALLEN Arlene and I have to get a divorce. She thinks I'm a pervert because I drank our water bed.
WOODY ALLEN You will notice that what we are aiming at when we fall in love is a very strange paradox. The parad...
WOODY ALLEN This guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, Doc, my brother’s crazy. He thinks he’s a chicken. The...
WOODY ALLEN The heart wants what it wants.
WOODY ALLEN We're all faced throughout our lives with agonizing decisions, moral choices. Some are on a grand sc...
WOODY ALLEN Chapter 1.
He adored New York City. He idolized it all out of proportion...no, make t...
WOODY ALLEN My brain? That's my second favorite organ.
WOODY ALLEN