This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.

This shirt is dry clean only. Which means...it's dirty.

I was walking down the street at 3am, and I passed a dry cleaner. The sign in the window said -"Sorry, We're Closed". You don't have to be sorry. It's 3am. And you're a dry cleaners. Its not like I was gonna come back at 10 and say "Hey man, I was here at 3 and you guys were closed... somebody owes me an apology."

On a traffic light green means go and yellow means yield, but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means where the hell did you get that banana at...

An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.

I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.