To err is human - but it feels divine

To err is human, but is feels divine.

If the whole human race lay in one grave, the epitaph on the headstone might well be: "It seemed a good idea at the time.".

I'm sure I've had my phone tapped for years, I don't think it's a crime against humanity they just ought to quit doing it, god damn it.

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork

Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.