Tweeting is really only good for one thing - it's just good for tweeting... It is rewarding, because it's just its own reward. It's sort of like heaven.


Steve Martin

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Nothing I do is done by popular demand.
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Well, excuuuuuse me!
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Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
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You want to be a bit compulsive in your art or craft or whatever you do.
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Well, excuuuuuse me!!!!.
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Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
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Be so good they can't ignore you.
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Love is a promise delivered already broken.
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Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.
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I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
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Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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I just brush it off and try to make a joke about it. Over the years it's been interesting.
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We are just happy that we are here in Brazil and that this was a good ending.
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pinching my swollen fingers in between. Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one elemen...
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Enjoyment while performing was rare—enjoyment would have been an indulgent loss of focus that come...
STEVE MARTIN
You’re nuts, but you’re welcome here.
STEVE MARTIN
I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a by-product. The course was more plodding t...
STEVE MARTIN
But my mother was aglow. She had a continuing fascination with celebrities, and now she had one of h...
STEVE MARTIN
...teaching is, after all, a form of show business.
STEVE MARTIN
Comedy is a distortion of what is happening, and there will always be something happening.
STEVE MARTIN
It was easy to be great. Every entertainer has a night when everything is clicking. These nights are...
STEVE MARTIN
What if there were no punch lines? What if there were no indicators? What if I created tension and n...
STEVE MARTIN
Thankfully, perseverance is a great substitute for talent.
STEVE MARTIN
...My father muttered something to me, and I responded with a mumbled "What". He shouted, "You heard...
STEVE MARTIN
In my opening seconds, I would say, "It's great to be here," then move to several other spots on the...
STEVE MARTIN
I opened the show with this line: "I have decided to give the greatest performance of my life! Oh, w...
STEVE MARTIN
But Carroll's were more convoluted, and they struck me as funny in a new way:

1) Babies a...
STEVE MARTIN
My most persistent memory of stand - up is of my mouth being in the present and my mind being in the...
STEVE MARTIN
How many people have never raised their hand before?
STEVE MARTIN
I have heard it said that a complicated childhood can lead to a life in the arts. I tell you this st...
STEVE MARTIN
Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one element necessary to all early creativity: na�...
STEVE MARTIN
You want to know how I think art should be taught to children? Take them to a museum and say, 'This ...
STEVE MARTIN
I've heard lots of people lie to themselves but they never fool anyone.
STEVE MARTIN
A nation or civilization that continues to produce soft-minded men purchases its own spiritual death...
MARTIN
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love ca...
MARTIN
Everybody can be great. Because anybody can serve.. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul gene...
MARTIN
A man who won't die for something is not fit to live.
MARTIN
It would have been a lot of fun as a receiver to play.
STEVE LARGENT
YouTube is a platform, a distribution vehicle.
STEVE CHEN
We're allowing technology to take out the non-value-added manual elements of the McDonald's ...
STEVE EASTERBROOK
Ultimately, the bread and butter of McDonald's is delivering great service, great quality food, ...
STEVE EASTERBROOK
Take the crocodile, for example, my favorite animal. There are 23 species. Seventeen of those specie...
STEVE IRWIN
There's a waterfall of content that you're missing out on.
STEVE CHEN
The great thing is that the funny side of getting old is fuel for my comedy.
STEVE COOGAN
Snakes are just very instinctive to me. I've been playing with snakes since before I could walk....
STEVE IRWIN
The first crocodile I ever caught was at nine years of age, and it was a rescue.
STEVE IRWIN
So fear helps me from making mistakes, but I make lot of mistakes.
STEVE IRWIN
No, snakes are no problem. I'd go to any country, anywhere, any snakes, not a problem.
STEVE IRWIN
I believe sustainable use is the greatest propaganda in wildlife conservation at the moment.
STEVE IRWIN
I sincerely believe that there's room for cutting down trees for forestry and grazing, so as we ...
STEVE IRWIN
That might have a lot to do with it, but you know, I probably don't show fear, but I suffer from...
STEVE IRWIN
We've evolved from sitting back on our tripods and shooting wildlife films like they have been s...
STEVE IRWIN
Every cent we earn from Crocodile Hunter goes straight back into conservation. Every single cent.
STEVE IRWIN
The only animals I'm not comfortable with are parrots, but I'm learning as I go. I'm get...
STEVE IRWIN
When I talk to the camera, mate, it's not like I'm talking to the camera, I'm talking to...
STEVE IRWIN
No matter where you go and what you do in America, you turn the tele on and you're confronted wi...
STEVE IRWIN
I am optimistic globally. So many scientists are working frantically on the reparation of our planet...
STEVE IRWIN
Crikey means gee whiz, wow!
STEVE IRWIN
Yeah, I'm a thrill seeker, but crikey, education's the most important thing.
STEVE IRWIN
Where I live if someone gives you a hug it's from the heart.
STEVE IRWIN