Wealth is relative. Some people aren’t really rich; they just have poor neighbors.

To become richer, earn more. To appear richer, move into a poorer neighborhood.

Rich people read their bills. Poor people dread theirs.

To gain height, lose all your tall friends.

Life punishes those who have things in abundance by making them worry about petty things like: what to wear, or, which car to drive.

To lose weight, spend time at the gym. To appear like you’ve lost weight, spend time with people who are bigger than you.