When i get my hands on you, your gonna be N.W.A , not without asswelts.

I am not crazy. It's the TV that's crazy. Aren't you, TV?

Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me!

Unlike most of you, I am not a nut.

I'm not telling you, 'Never eat a hamburger.' Just eat the good ones with real beef, you know, like the ones from that mom-and-pop diner down the street, ... And it's so good that when you take a bite out of that burger, you just know somewhere in the world a vegan is crying.

(Lisa) "I'm going to become a vegetarian" (Homer) "Does that mean you're not going to eat any pork?" "Yes" "Bacon?" "Yes Dad" Ham?" "Dad all those meats come from the same animal" "Right Lisa, some wonderful, magical animal!"