You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?

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Mark Twain

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I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES Food Allergies Are Not Due to Food, Rather Are Due to the Constant Contamination of That Food That Y...
THEHEALTHFOODGURU

I think that all women are witches, in the sense that a witch is a magical being. And a wizard, whic...
YOKO ONO

Angels, demons, spirits, wizards, gods and witches have peppered folk religions since mankind first ...
ROBIN MARANTZ HENIG

Animals, they are one of the most beautiful gifts we have and, you know, if there are people that ha...
ALYSSA MILANO

There will never be a good time, financially, to get married, unless you're Shaq or Ray Romano. But ...
GREG BEHRENDT

Here is one fact 1 minute to finish the class, 1 day to die, one day behind that fact, one day in th...
DEYTH BANGER When you find that you are on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect." Mark Twain
STEVE J. LEATHERWOOD

Mark Twain had a way of telling stories that shifts your consciousness away from labels.
VAL KILMER

Mark Twain and I are in the same position. We have put things in such a way as to make people, who w...
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW

I realized that day that blessings come in a variety of shapes, colors, and sizes.
CRAIG GROESCHEL The road to salvation is filled with many false dark turn-offs, if you take those roads they will le...
GARY F EVANS... Wild animals are just as confused as people are now. You've got toxins in the water, oil, sewage...
JACK HANNAH Convinced that we're living the whole time that we're dying.
We decide to go out walking the wh...
TEGAN QUIN

The dark book has been terribly popular. Dark characters, dysfunction, and all sorts of things from ...
JAN KARON

Lies are just stories, and stories are all that matter. We all tell stories. Some are more truthful ...
LAUREN OLIVER

The two men had a conversation. Brief, cryptic, to the point. As though they had exchanged numbers a...
ARUNDHATI ROY

This earth that we live on is full of stories in the same way that, for a fish, the ocean is full of...
BEN OKRI Ha-ha!' the fox laughed. '*Just* stories, you say, as if stories mean nothing? Stories are the stuff...
C. ALEXANDER LONDON

All I ever did to that apartment was hang fifty yards of yellow theatrical silk across the bedroom w...
JOAN DIDION We can never make proper goodbyes. It was your last ride in a Checker cab and you had no warning. It...
COLSON WHITEHEAD

All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn. American w...
ERNEST HEMINGWAY Being present is being connected to All Things.
S. KELLEY HARRELL, M. DIV. I think: perhaps the sky is a huge sea of fresh water and we, instead of walking under it, walk on t...
JOSé LUíS PEIXOTO

All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY

All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called "Huckleberry Finn."
ERNEST HEMINGWAY

Stairs to climb are difficult it takes time and effort and going down is easies job... what do I mea...
DEYTH BANGER

The human race is a very, very magical race. We have a magic power of witches and wizards. We're...
YOKO ONO Sometimes I wish for falling
Wish for the release
Wish for falling through the air
To...
FLORENCE WELCH [March 25 -] Songs and Stories for Everybody ... the Mark Twain of contemporary kids' music.
BILL HARLEY

It comes from history. It comes from the record of the Inquisition, persecuting heretics and torturi...
PHILIP PULLMAN

They say we wizards are subtle. But believe you me, we've got nothing, nothing at all, on women JIM BUTCHER The great book for you is the book that has the most to say to you at the moment when you are readin...
ROBERTSON DAVIES Mark Twain created a new type of literature and not a lot of people can say that. Not a lot of peopl...
VAL KILMER Most of all, we remain focused on our Rock that never moves.
CRAIG GROESCHEL I believe that all men and women will be saved.
PAT BUCKLEY We have the capacity to become a unique and special person unlike any other. Draw on your inner reso...
ANGIE KARAN You digest and absorb your life by turning it into stories,' he says, 'the same way this theater see...
CHUCK PALAHNIUK They say a good love is one that sits you down, gives you a drink of water, and pats you on top of t...
C. JOYBELL C. Every day is a new day for the intelligence people. I would say that we are probably a couple of yea...
PORTER GOSS But I find it necessary to repeat in this particular place that the division into classes, which is ...
LEWIS SPENCE You should never provide food, cover or water for wildlife around your home. Animals that receive he...
JOE YARCHIN You don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer; bu...
MARK TWAIN I want people to take the initiative to find veterans that need help, veterans that are suffering an...
MAX MARTINI Embrace YOU...Believe in yourself, in this very moment...forgive yourself for all mistakes and 'bad'...
ANGIE KARAN The Biggest Threat to our Democracy, Freedoms and Future is Leadership that fosters and Appeases the...
MICHAEL HARRIS We started as social workers and wanted to be in a caring profession and then we did all these other...
MELINDA BLANCHARD I bought a book of Mark Twain quotes. That's about my speed. I'll read a couple quotes and p...
KID ROCK The best stories in our culture have some sort of subversiveness - Mark Twain, 'Catcher in the R...
MATT GROENING You know about witches, wizards. You can envision dragons, even if you presently think you are above...
THOMM QUACKENBUSH We will expect to be there quick enough so that food, water, those sorts of issues probably will not...
GENE KITTS You are talking about what 15 to 20 hotels can do for the tournament, not just the ones downtown. Yo...
DAVE BLANK Now is the time when you see people which you know... but they start ignoring you... and how do you ...
DEYTH BANGER The need has to be defined by an Individual. If the basic need of quenching thirst can be met by a g...
AJAY CHATURVEDI Being a vampire is not a curse. It’s a disease,” Tessa filled in. “But they still can’t ente...
CASSANDRA CLARE All we are, all we can be, are the stories we tell," he says, and he is talking as if he is talking ...
NORA RALEIGH BASKIN My book, Ambassador Book one: how to take on the world and win will help to illuminate many of the o...
KEN TAYLOR In the quantum multiverse all eventualities are possible. Which means, paradoxically, that all event...
EMMA JANE UNSWORTH If we can get people out here to help us plant as much as possible by May 6 and 15, that would be gr...
JUSTIN WILLEY We need, in a special way, to work twice as hard to help people understand that the animals are fell...
CéSAR CHáVEZ Clean water is a great example of something that depends on energy. And if you solve the water probl...
RICHARD SMALLEY Often you hear stories about never working with children. I disagree because children still have tha...
NICOLAS CAGE I think all sorts of things do [help], in terms of Buddhism, in terms of therapy. I think people cho...
NICOLE KIDMAN People are capable of good and bad. As long as we continue perpetrating these absurd two-dimensional...
SAM MENDES I’m burning all the time. My pockets full of matches and lighters, the blue smoke crawling out lik...
MATTHEW DICKMAN I believe that you can always learn from observation.
TAMARA TUNIE I think that there is incredible prejudice about witches while there is no prejudice about wizards. ...
YOKO ONO I’ve read science fiction and fantasy all my life – though when you’re a child, they just call...
CATHERYNNE M. VALENTE Perhaps man was neither good nor bad, was only a machine in an insensate universe--his courage no mo...
T.H. WHITE We need the humbleness and clarity to see that our food, while benefitting from technological advanc...
DAN BARBER Faërie contains many things besides elves and fays, and besides dwarfs, witches, trolls, giants, or...
J.R.R. TOLKIEN Humans like stories. Humans need stories. Stories are good. Stories work. Story clarifies and captur...
JASPER FFORDE Falling from the sky like the rain,
And I fly and sing like the little birds...,
Movemen...
ANA CLAUDIA ANTUNES They say the ads are still out there and they believe they may help, but other people say the credib...
CRAIG OLIVER You should never turn down the offer of another man’s story,’ the fox persisted, moving off a li...
T.B. MCKENZIE Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'l...
DICK VAN DYKE Sometimes I say to myself, what are you doing in this absurd job? Why don't you go to Africa and...
JAVIER BARDEM The problem is that they don't even realize that they're walking a new road every day. They don't se...
PAULO COELHO Let your little inspire someone greatly and greatly be the reasons for the smiles of someone in litt...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Let your little inspires someone greatly and greatly be the reasons for the smiles of someone in lit...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all...
STEVEN WRIGHT Often the magical elements in my books are standing in for elements of the real world, the small and...
CHARLES DE LINT We have tears in our eyes
As we wave our goodbyes,
We so loved being with you, we three. ROALD DAHL Even after the dehadhyas (the belief that 'I am the body') has gone, people will say, "I saw you eat...
DADA BHAGWAN A friend of mine told a story about a date with a guy she was really excited about: He stood her up....
GREG BEHRENDT President Bush had an opportunity tonight to say, 'Look ... things aren't going very well in Iraq an...
MIKE MCCURRY I know there’s evil in the world, and there always has been. But you don’t need to believe in Sa...
TESS GERRITSEN When you are walking on water it is fear, not sharks, that sinks you.
MATSHONA DHLIWAYO Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affec...
CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS I am in politics because of the conflict between good and evil, and I believe that in the end good w...
MARGARET THATCHER You know, we still have a lot of debris from the storm. So much stuff needs cleaning up that people ...
GREG CHATHAM You can tell these monarchs are migrating and won't winter over. The butterflies that winter over wo...
RUSS MILLER Be nice to the environment. Be nice to animals. Be nice to people. If you do that, you will leave a ...
ENOCK MAREGESI You can react negatively to what you can't do without, if applied wrongly. ie. you are walking along...
ALALE ANTHONY Because you are working a very large muscle group and that takes energy and that burning that energy...
KATHRYN SCHMITZ Prophets of doom have always taken risks in terms of ridicule and humiliation. If you stand on a str...
ROBERT KIYOSAKI When you get into the whole field of exploring, probably 90 percent of the kinds of organisms, plant...
E. O. WILSON All that I say is, examine, inquire. Look into the nature of things. Search out the grounds of your ...
FRANCES WRIGHT I believe that all things are possible under God.
BROOKE ELLIOTT You are all that exists on the earth and under the sky that I do love.
CASSANDRA CLARE

More Mark Twain

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
MARK TWAIN My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAIN Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.
MARK TWAIN It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure tha...
MARK TWAIN The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.
MARK TWAIN India has 2,000,000 gods and worships them all. In religion, all other countries are paupers; India ...
MARK TWAIN Ideally a book would have no order to it, and the reader would have to discover his own.
MARK TWAIN I never let schooling interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
MARK TWAIN Civilization is the limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.
MARK TWAIN The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed rig...
MARK TWAIN There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress.
MARK TWAIN In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.
MARK TWAIN Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here firs...
MARK TWAIN But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one...
MARK TWAIN The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
MARK TWAIN The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
MARK TWAIN Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of ti...
MARK TWAIN It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
MARK TWAIN The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
MARK TWAIN The lack of money is the root of all evil.
MARK TWAIN Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
MARK TWAIN Optimist: day dreamer more elegantly spelled.
MARK TWAIN Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
MARK TWAIN Man was made at the end of the week's work, when God was tired.
MARK TWAIN Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.
MARK TWAIN There are lies, damned lies and statistics.
MARK TWAIN Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
MARK TWAIN Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside...
MARK TWAIN Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
MARK TWAIN The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.
MARK TWAIN Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
MARK TWAIN I make it a rule never to smoke while I'm sleeping.
MARK TWAIN The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
MARK TWAIN All generalizations are false, including this one.
MARK TWAIN 'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.
MARK TWAIN The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a ba...
MARK TWAIN The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
MARK TWAIN Let us endeavor so to live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
MARK TWAIN I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
MARK TWAIN Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
MARK TWAIN If I owned half of that dog, I would shoot my half.
MARK TWAIN What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed ...
MARK TWAIN When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. B...
MARK TWAIN When you have prayed for victory you have prayed for many unmentioned results which follow victorymu...
MARK TWAIN The teacher reminded us that Romes liberties were not auctioned off in a day, but were bought slowly...
MARK TWAIN By his father he is English, by his mother he is Americanto my mind the blend which makes the perfec...
MARK TWAIN So I became a newspaperman. I hated to do it but I couldnt find honest employment.
MARK TWAIN The people of those foreign countries are very, very ignorant. They looked curiously at the costumes...
MARK TWAIN We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in itand stop there; lest w...
MARK TWAIN The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large mattertis the diff...
MARK TWAIN Say the report is exaggerated.
MARK TWAIN A jay hasnt got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will ...
MARK TWAIN To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature Congressman.
MARK TWAIN I think I can say, and say with pride, that we have some legislatures that bring higher prices than ...
MARK TWAIN A myriad of men are born; they labor and sweat and struggle; ...they squabble and scold and fight; t...
MARK TWAIN Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts and happenings. It consists mainly of the st...
MARK TWAIN Annihilation has no terrors for me, because I have already tried it before I was born --a hundred mi...
MARK TWAIN Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to...
MARK TWAIN We never become really and genuinely our entire and honest selves until we are dead -- and not then ...
MARK TWAIN Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
MARK TWAIN All say, How hard it is that we have to die -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people...
MARK TWAIN Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find...
MARK TWAIN Write without pay until somebody offers to pay you. If nobody offers within three years, sawing wood...
MARK TWAIN As to the adjective, when in doubt strike it out.
MARK TWAIN I am admonished in many ways that time is pushing me inexorably along. I am approaching the threshol...
MARK TWAIN Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than...
MARK TWAIN The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without burst...
MARK TWAIN When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
MARK TWAIN All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
MARK TWAIN The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do wh...
MARK TWAIN To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know because I've done it a thousand ...
MARK TWAIN Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
MARK TWAIN It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native American criminal...
MARK TWAIN Man was made at the end of the week's work, when God was tired
MARK TWAIN It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.
MARK TWAIN Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to.
MARK TWAIN Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting...
MARK TWAIN To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.
MARK TWAIN Between us, we cover all knowledge; he knows all that can be known and I know the rest.
MARK TWAIN The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itse...
MARK TWAIN Stars are good too. I wish I could get some to put in my hair. But I suppose I never can. You would ...
MARK TWAIN There are German songs which can make a stranger to the language cry.
MARK TWAIN The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but that they know so many things tha...
MARK TWAIN Optimist: Day-dreamer more elegantly spelled
MARK TWAIN Necessity is the mother of "taking chances"
MARK TWAIN Distance lends enchantment to the view
MARK TWAIN Be good and you will be lonesome.
MARK TWAIN Chastity - you can carry it too far
MARK TWAIN To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler--and less trouble.
MARK TWAIN Most writers regard truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in it...
MARK TWAIN Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.
MARK TWAIN When you cannot get a compliment in any other way pay yourself one.
MARK TWAIN There is nothing you can say in answer to a compliment. I have been complimented myself a great many...
MARK TWAIN Never learn to do anything. If you don't learn, you will always find someone else to do it for you.
MARK TWAIN I can't do literary work for the rest of this year because I'm meditating another lawsuit and lookin...
MARK TWAIN Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would...
MARK TWAIN Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which, before their union, were not perceived to have any relati...
MARK TWAIN Wit and Humor -- if any difference, it is in duration -- lightning and electric light. Same material...
MARK TWAIN Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of Humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no...
MARK TWAIN There is a great deal of human nature in people.
MARK TWAIN If man had created man, he would be ashamed of his performance.
MARK TWAIN There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
MARK TWAIN The human race was always interesting and we know by its past that it will always continue so, monot...
MARK TWAIN Man is a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
MARK TWAIN Such is the human race. Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat...
MARK TWAIN It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts th...
MARK TWAIN Of all the various kinds of sexual intercourse, this has the least to recommend it. As an amusement,...
MARK TWAIN Scientists have odious manners, except when you prop up their theory; then you can borrow money of t...
MARK TWAIN Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
MARK TWAIN Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind.
MARK TWAIN We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.
MARK TWAIN O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover th...
MARK TWAIN A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be lead by the nose.
MARK TWAIN Happiness ain't a thing in itself --it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant. And so,...
MARK TWAIN There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one: keep from telling their happiness to...
MARK TWAIN I repeat, sir, that in whatever position you place a woman she is an ornament to society and a treas...
MARK TWAIN Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. The conviction of the rich...
MARK TWAIN Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide i...
MARK TWAIN Let us be grateful to Adam, our benefactor. He cut us out of the blessing of idleness and won for us...
MARK TWAIN Intellectual work is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.
MARK TWAIN Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions.
MARK TWAIN I do not like work even when someone else does it.
MARK TWAIN Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do, and play consists of whatever a body is not oblig...
MARK TWAIN Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.
MARK TWAIN Truth is neither alive nor dead; it just aggravates itself all the time.
MARK TWAIN No real gentleman will tell the naked truth in the presence of ladies.
MARK TWAIN We had the sky up there, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss whether th...
MARK TWAIN Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True ...
MARK TWAIN When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.
MARK TWAIN Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know.
MARK TWAIN Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
MARK TWAIN We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the hum...
MARK TWAIN There's always something about your success that displeases even your best friends.
MARK TWAIN I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- except he...
MARK TWAIN There was never a century nor a country that was short of experts who knew the Deity's mind and were...
MARK TWAIN People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
MARK TWAIN My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAIN A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razor strap. A thin book is useful to stick under a table ...
MARK TWAIN When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man's moral constitution and make a te...
MARK TWAIN In statesmanship get the formalities right, never mind about the moralities.
MARK TWAIN Fleas can be taught nearly anything that a Congressman can.
MARK TWAIN The lack of money is the root of all evils.
MARK TWAIN His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.
MARK TWAIN Both marriage and death ought to be welcome: The one promises happiness, doubtless the other assures...
MARK TWAIN All schools, all colleges, have two great functions: to confer, and to conceal, valuable knowledge. ...
MARK TWAIN Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. Traini...
MARK TWAIN We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; and its efficiency is only m...
MARK TWAIN There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence.
MARK TWAIN It is by the goodness of God that we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech...
MARK TWAIN There isn't a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American.
MARK TWAIN War talk by men who have been in a war is always interesting; whereas moon talk by a poet who has no...
MARK TWAIN There comes a time in every rightly constructed boy's life when he has a raging desire to go somewhe...
MARK TWAIN To arrive at a just estimate of a renowned man's character one must judge it by the standards of his...
MARK TWAIN One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.
MARK TWAIN A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.
MARK TWAIN A lie can run around the world six times while the truth is still trying to put on its pants.
MARK TWAIN I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, b...
MARK TWAIN The public is the only critic whose opinion is worth anything at all.
MARK TWAIN A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which gives immortality to conversati...
MARK TWAIN Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expe...
MARK TWAIN Satan hasn't a single salaried helper; the Opposition employ a million.
MARK TWAIN It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare.
MARK TWAIN Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear. Except a creature be part cowar...
MARK TWAIN Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself
MARK TWAIN When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man aro...
MARK TWAIN Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
MARK TWAIN It was the schoolboy who said, Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
MARK TWAIN Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.
MARK TWAIN There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it ...
MARK TWAIN I've never let my school interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in al...
MARK TWAIN Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).
MARK TWAIN If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal di...
MARK TWAIN A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was getting knowledge that was always going...
MARK TWAIN Man is the Reasoning Animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to dispute. Indeed, my experiment...
MARK TWAIN Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the ca...
MARK TWAIN If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the r...
MARK TWAIN The Bible has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a...
MARK TWAIN Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its...
MARK TWAIN The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
MARK TWAIN Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the reall...
MARK TWAIN If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN ′Classic′ - a book which people praise and don't read.
MARK TWAIN Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
MARK TWAIN I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.
MARK TWAIN Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Trut...
MARK TWAIN Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
MARK TWAIN A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN All right, then, I'll go to hell.
MARK TWAIN The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
MARK TWAIN Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
MARK TWAIN If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be—a Christian.
MARK TWAIN To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.
MARK TWAIN Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it ...
MARK TWAIN Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
MARK TWAIN Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
MARK TWAIN Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
MARK TWAIN I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
MARK TWAIN

You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?

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Mark Twain

You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?

Mark Twain

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