A friend once asked me what comedy was. That floored me. What is comedy? I don't know. Does anybody? Can you define it? All I know is that I learned how to get laughs, and that's all I know about it. You have to learn what people will laugh at, then proceed accordingly.


Stan Laurel

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Most folks call 'em green onions, but they're really scallions!
STAN FREBERG
It's one of the major landmarks here in Kingston. It's one of the first things you see when you get ...
STAN SMITH
It was being in the right place, the right time, I guess. It could have been a lot worse.
STAN SMITH
Their economic impact is substantial. I think that's reflected by the fact that other states are act...
STAN SMITH
Our (offensive) line is amazing. If the line gets off and gives the back five yards, it opens up a l...
STAN SMITH
So many things had to happen in order for this to come true.
STAN SMITH
This is not a beauty pageant. We want to be emphatic about that. This is about the quality of young ...
STAN SMITH
It might be one of those destiny things. At that point in time, I started thinking I'm going to be a...
STAN SMITH
I decided that once I turned 50, if I was physically and financially okay, I would join the PBA and ...
STAN SMITH
This was a life's goal of mine. I don't know if a Canadian has ever won a PBA title before. There's ...
STAN SMITH
[Popular sympathy for snowbirds is often restrained by class envy and the phenomenon of all the out-...
STAN SMITH
Our game is the interior.
STAN HEATH
There was heavy fog; that's when that front was going through. There would have been zero visibility...
STAN WASOWSKI
Guys don't have very many ways to express themselves. Facial hair is equated with masculinity, and m...
STAN WILLIAMS
We think it's very important, we think it's vital and it's just another step in retaining and recrui...
STAN SMITH
He said something to me in the dugout and wanted to go back out. It stiffened up out there, and he c...
STAN CONTE
Always wanted to be a Major League player. Loved baseball. Followed it. Loved to play. Plus, I could...
STAN MUSIAL
I'm tired of free throw situations where we're supposed to be getting those rebounds and we're getti...
STAN HEATH
The blacksmith was the most important person in a Western town. He knew everybody. Everybody came to...
STAN GRIMES
Drew would run through a brick wall for (Temples). When he asked him to put his hand down, he didn't...
STAN KENTON
If you ask any 10 people on the street if they have ever heard of Stan Kenton," he once said, "only ...
STAN KENTON
Some of the wise boys who say my music is loud, blatant and that's all should see the faces of the k...
STAN KENTON
Nostalgia's the most commercial commodity there is today; I believe it's true all over the world.
STAN KENTON
I probably need to vent my frustrations to others more than I do. In some ways, I've amazed myself a...
STAN JAMES
Jack Benny.
STAN FREBERG
You have license in front of the camera to do things, feel certain emotions that you don't get t...
SEBASTIAN STAN
It's very common to see them sitting by a roadside watching traffic go by. It's speculation, but we ...
STAN GEHRT
Given this, it's more important than ever that the General Assembly move forward to correct a long o...
STAN CAVE
I appreciate men like Ben Webster and Coleman Hawkins very much.
STAN GETZ
In some cases, Medicare has incomplete or inaccurate data.
STAN ROSENSTEIN
Often, they expose it, then poop on it just to let you know they found it and they're not going to g...
STAN GEHRT
And what is an angel
but a ghost in drag?
STAN RICE
Hitting is like swimming. Once you learn the stroke, you never forget it.
STAN MUSIAL
A lot of hitters stay away from the plate, some are close up, some are forward, some are back. The t...
STAN MUSIAL
The Hollywood movies are more like novels, and the kinds of films I make are more like poems.
STAN BRAKHAGE
Fears and expectations that date back to earlier experiences of dependency, but that didn't arise du...
STAN TATKIN
You want a trusted adviser, not a peddler.
STAN LOAR
They're not going around foraging in garbage cans and things like that.
STAN GEHRT
Native fish like to lay eggs in gravel, not mud.
STAN GREGORY
Splitting series is not going to do anything as far as percentage points. It's all about percentage ...
STAN SANCHEZ
You are seeing some strange retail bedfellows. They may compete at some level, but they also bring s...
STAN POHMER
A morning contrast shower works as a gym, sauna and spa in your bathroom.
STAN JACOBS