FastSaying

ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn."Eat arsenic? Yes, all you get," Consenting, he did speak up;"'Tis better you should eat it, pet, Than put it in my teacup." --Joel Huck


Ambrose Bierce

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Stress is not the spice of life any more than arsenic is. And without it, you won't feel bored.
ANDREW J. BERNSTEIN If somebody offers you an amazing opportunity but you are not sure you can do it, say yes – then l...
RICHARD BRANSON This world is a joke, and I'm in it
OLIWAH GOUDEE Mark Twain put it best when he said, 'Reports of my demise are greatly exaggerated,
BILL BRADLEY Some were greatly offended, some were terribly amused, but mostly they were shocked that he did it k...
RICHARD HAMILTON ACCOUNTABILITY, n. The mother of caution."My accountability, bear in mind," Said the Grand Vizier: "...
AMBROSE BIERCE Muscular Dystrophy affects our family greatly, and it also affects so many other families and what's...
LISA WARD He will be greatly, greatly missed by all of us, ... Everyone who ever met that man had a positive a...
BILL SHAW You must be the person you have never had the courage to be. Gradually, you will discover that you a...
PAULO COELHO Her hormones slipped into their sexy underwear with a grin.
JENNIFER SCHMIDT If you can dream it, you can do it.
ENZO FERRARI This is how southern woman worked all peaches in cream laced with arsenic 
MOLLY HARPER It is what it is, it is what you make it.
JAMES DURBIN When you speak in another accent, it affects you. You can't help but be changed by it.
ALESSANDRO NIVOLA Time is a teacher which in the end it kills all it's students. (Synchronicity 2015 Film)
DEYTH BANGER The future is greatly different than your life now, the actions that you take must also be greatly d...
STEVE MARABOLI The campus community is greatly saddened by the death of Adam Toombs and we continue to be in prayer...
CHRIS WILLIAMS Do the thing and you will have the power.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON The way President Abraham Lincoln is said to have handled a person who had a know-it-all attitude. L...
JOHN C. MAXWELL The man or woman that believes their success soley rests on their actions is sorely mistaken.
JOHN LEACH if you cannot get it all right, don't get it all wrong
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Who you know only gets you in the door; what you know gets you the keys to the house.
GINA GREENLEE There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.” ~ Ambrose ...
J.J. MCAVOY Even though it's unlikely that the arsenic is widespread, it is possible that there are unhealthy le...
ED SCHWARTZ The biggest issue is probably related to arsenic,
GEORGE FOSTER It is a lie.
ARTHUR MILLER I get depressed when the sun is clouded over. It affects me.
BRIAN WILDSMITH No formal course in fiction-writing can equal a close and observant perusal of the stories of Edgar ...
H. P. LOVECRAFT Bravery breaks barriers! You were not born to be mediocre! Put on courage and conquer! Don’t forge...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH It is told that Buddha, going out to look on life, was greatly daunted by death. "They all eat one a...
CHARLOTTE PERKINS GILMAN Instinct's the iron skeleton under all our ideas of free will.
STEPHEN KING You don't find interesting stuff because you don't search enough, ... every book has it's own lesson...
DEYTH BANGER The plant could survive a heavily polluted environment with arsenic density of three percent.
CHEN TONGBIN 6 Ways To Give Your Mind A Break:

1. Stop stressing
2. Stop worrying
3. Give re...
GERMANY KENT How to get it, I annoy you???
You are not interested???

What's the idea???
DEYTH BANGER Sometimes you fall back and find something better than what you were going for,and then sometimes yo...
EMILY THOMAS You can coddle your rage, or you can fully engage.
TONY CLEAVER It doesn't only affect the people here. It very greatly affects the Silver City people. It would be ...
DEEGEE PAWLICKI Ah,” Sean said, smothering a laugh. “The brilliant plan falling apart? Wow. Wish I’d seen that...
MAUREEN CHILD When you do voiceover it's such a fun job to be able to do. First of all, you can do it in your ...
KELLY HU If it's what you do and you can do it, then you do it.
VAN MORRISON If you think you can do it, you can.
JOHN BURROUGHS It ain't bragging if you can do it.
DIZZY DEAN It sometimes seems that we have only to love a thing greatly to get it.
ROBERT COLLIER It sometimes seems that we have only to solve a thing greatly to get it.
ROBERT COLLIER God walked with humanity in the cool of the day and gave them the most difficult and hottest parts o...
JOEY TALLADINO If you don't think it.
You'll never do it!
ANTHONY T. HINCKS You silly," said Abdul, "those clouds don' mean nothing. I see'd them plenty a'ready. It was jus' co...
THEO ENGELA Harry Potter told his son you’re a great man. [...] He said you were the bravest man he’d ever m...
J.K. ROWLING You can instill fear in your kids and get them to mind, but they won't function better in the wo...
IAN DUNBAR Just get it right, “it is not too late to dream”. You can do it now! This very moment, I mean ri...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Something did happen, and I really don't feel proud of it.
DEYTH BANGER Big corporations are misleading consumers by telling us continuously that bottled water is better fo...
DAN FAVRE If you dream it, it can happen.
DYLAN TAYLOR Confound it, it's foolish, Tom
MARK TWAIN If you greatly desire something, have the guts to stake everything on obtaining it.
BRENDAN FRANCIS If you greatly desire something, have the guts to stake everything on obtaining it.
BRENDAN BEHAN To promote laughter without joining in it greatly heightens the effect.
HONORE DE BALZAC If you believe in what you're doing, you should just do it. You'll keep getting better.
RIKI LINDHOME What greatly annoys me is sometimes you see the short story being described as a training ground for...
KEVIN BARRY It's all about believing in yourself, in knowing that the second you get fouled on a shot, it means ...
BRANDON HEATH Always Be Ready For Anything that Comes: Bananas, Chips, College, an Opportunity, so when it does yo...
DANIEL OJEDA Never allow yourself to be so desperate that you end up settling for far less than you deserve. To m...
DR ANIL KUMAR SINHA Bobby was everywhere, all around the events and greatly involved with the kids at Paint Valley. He w...
BOB WARD He needs to greatly increase the school funding. The priority for those parents is for the schools t...
BILLY EASTON Have confidence in everything. No matter what it is that you're doing, know that you can do it b...
O'SHEA JACKSON, JR. you have to be the prude or the slut, and if you pick one, other people hate you for it, and you can...
NED VIZZINI As I make my way through, I feel okayness reaching through me.
The funny thing is that okayness...
MARKUS ZUSAK We know that arsenic likes to stick to iron oxides, various kinds of rust,
GREGORY MILLER A great demand today is that work should be interesting. This is a recent development in human histo...
GEORGE WATSON Unpredictability means what it means. I don't know how you define it. It is what it is.
MICHAEL KEATON Do. Then talk. In that order.
SOTERO M LOPEZ II If you want a revenge, don't hold it. It poisons you.
Either you just let the grudge go, or mak...
TOBA BETA It ends or it doesn't.
That’s what you say. That’s
how you get through it.
The tu...
CAITLYN SIEHL For starters, that’s a rather simple principle of Time Travel right there – and according to the...
CHRISTINA ENGELA I have spend a lot of time on everything and what's impresses me about people I have written that in...
DEYTH BANGER Yes. That's it. That's the document. Where did you get it?
PIERRE SALINGER It's all about believing in yourself, in knowing that the second you get fouled on a shot, it means ...
BRANDON HEATH The task force is bringing this in for a landing. Opinions about it vary greatly.
EDIE OUSLEY You don't want it to continue the way it is, to become unbearable to the point where it affects him,...
FRANK ROBINSON And I know things are...screwed up between us. I know that. Even if you tell me you'd rather hump a ...
JENNIFER L. ARMENTROUT Don't ever reject a small
when you can't take it all.
TOBA BETA In the end, the truth will prevail. Good and evil keep at war.
Whichever wins, future will beli...
TOBA BETA It's splendid. I missed it greatly.
JAY SEVERIN We believe it's from the mine tailings from the mining operations, because we haven't seen that leve...
JON HOLT Drop down someone else's shoe and run to take your own quickly. Don't hire your own to anybody, else...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR You! You tricked me! I never want to see you or that bottle of liquid arsenic again!”

I...
JEANIENE FROST Risks can lead to great victories or defeats. Even if you are defeated, the lesson will be valuable ...
LAILAH GIFTYAKITA The same ocean of love became the ocean of sorrow in which I drowned... -Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN I love my destruction. Cause I still love the cause of my destruction -Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN She broke her own heart by holding him into it.... -Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN She craved for the moon, not knowing there were other stars in the sky too... -Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN You know your value, Only when someone else crumbles it... -Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN To be street smart it takes respect of a persons ability to control their emotional state and to kno...
GARY F EVANS... Just like any one of us, they started with no road map or guarantee of success. But they went out an...
CAMILLE SWEENEY His name was engraved deep in the core of her heart.. - Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN I will lock my feelings up and throw the key in the ocean till someone comes, ready to hunt the dept...
ANSHIKA JAIN It's funny.. I still love the person who made me lose my ability to love... -Anshika.
ANSHIKA JAIN Its like I'm a broken mirror.. Don't try to pick my shattered pieces or you will hurt yourself .... ...
ANSHIKA JAIN The story was so broken that no one could ever find the missing pieces.... -Anshika
ANSHIKA JAIN

More Ambrose Bierce

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the e...
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
AMBROSE BIERCE Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for,...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Suffrage, noun. Expression of opinion by means of a ballot. The right of suffrage (which is held to ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Doubt is the father of invention.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
AMBROSE BIERCE Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.
AMBROSE BIERCE Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
AMBROSE BIERCE Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Liberty:one of imaginations most precious possessions.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant: a person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bone.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE OCEAN, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man -- who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZEAL, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. A passion that goeth b...
AMBROSE BIERCE For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His e...
AMBROSE BIERCE Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understand...
AMBROSE BIERCE Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
AMBROSE BIERCE You don't have to be stupid to be a Christian, ... but it probably helps.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no g...
AMBROSE BIERCE Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
AMBROSE BIERCE The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, m...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bride. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking th...
AMBROSE BIERCE Learning. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consult. To seek another's approval of a course already decided on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Happiness is an agreeable sensation, arising from contemplating the misery of others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance: a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate ...
AMBROSE BIERCE An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Let me tell you what a writer is. A writer takes comprehensive views, holds large convictions, makes...
AMBROSE BIERCE Corporation. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
AMBROSE BIERCE Don't steal; thou it never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
AMBROSE BIERCE Philanthropist. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his co...
AMBROSE BIERCE Age. That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no...
AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against one's fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Education is that which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understan...
AMBROSE BIERCE Destiny. A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
AMBROSE BIERCE Erudition. Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint. A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurrection. An unsuccessful revolution; disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad gover...
AMBROSE BIERCE Revolution is an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation. The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.
AMBROSE BIERCE A prejudice is a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
AMBROSE BIERCE Bigot, one who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
AMBROSE BIERCE Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly un...
AMBROSE BIERCE Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration t...
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiration; is our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
AMBROSE BIERCE To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.
AMBROSE BIERCE A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCE All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
AMBROSE BIERCE A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves a glorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Peace, in international affairs, is a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE An optimist is a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
AMBROSE BIERCE As records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolen...
AMBROSE BIERCE Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politeness -- The most acceptable hypocrisy.
AMBROSE BIERCE A man is known by the company he organizes.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapaciti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Enthusiasm. A distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward ap...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
AMBROSE BIERCE An egotist is a person interested in himself than in me!
AMBROSE BIERCE Duty. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.
AMBROSE BIERCE Opiate. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurance: An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comforta...
AMBROSE BIERCE Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.
AMBROSE BIERCE Alien. An American sovereign in his probationary state.
AMBROSE BIERCE Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Mis...
AMBROSE BIERCE Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is please...
AMBROSE BIERCE Wit. The salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
AMBROSE BIERCE A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impartial. Unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a cont...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the worl...
AMBROSE BIERCE Physician -- One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce. A resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consul. In American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is give...
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscien...
AMBROSE BIERCE A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Confidante. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is ...
AMBROSE BIERCE A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.
AMBROSE BIERCE An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.
AMBROSE BIERCE To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.
AMBROSE BIERCE An account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly k...
AMBROSE BIERCE Historian. A broad -- gauge gossip.
AMBROSE BIERCE Habit is a shackle for the free.
AMBROSE BIERCE Laughter -- An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.
AMBROSE BIERCE Appeal. In law, to put the dice into the box for another throw.
AMBROSE BIERCE Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, ad...
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience. The wisdom that enables us to recognize in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly tha...
AMBROSE BIERCE The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.
AMBROSE BIERCE When in Rome, do as Rome does.
AMBROSE BIERCE To be positive: to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Censor, n. An officer of certain governments, employed to supress the works of genius. Among the Rom...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bore -- a person who talks when you wish him to listen.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by frie...
AMBROSE BIERCE Irreligion. The principal one of the great faiths of the world.
AMBROSE BIERCE Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things withou...
AMBROSE BIERCE Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
AMBROSE BIERCE Genealogy. An account of one's descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Absurdity. A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abstainer. A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Woman absent is woman dead.
AMBROSE BIERCE The covers of this book are too far apart.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abscond. To move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their deso...
AMBROSE BIERCE A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE Conservative. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a Liberal, who wi...
AMBROSE BIERCE The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Alliance. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserte...
AMBROSE BIERCE ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply in...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intima...
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
AMBROSE BIERCE Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
AMBROSE BIERCE International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smoulde...
AMBROSE BIERCE DIPLOMACY, n. Lying in state, or the patriotic art of lying for one's country.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds. Misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
AMBROSE BIERCE There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
AMBROSE BIERCE FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZOOLOGY, n. The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly ("Mus...
AMBROSE BIERCE HIPPOGRIFF, n. An animal (now extinct) which was half horse and half griffin. The griffin was a com...
AMBROSE BIERCE ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A m...
AMBROSE BIERCE YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander. In the So...
AMBROSE BIERCE Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscie...
AMBROSE BIERCE One who is in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was onc...
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled wh...
AMBROSE BIERCE When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover.
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity seems destined to play a most important part in the arts and industries. The question of...
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
AMBROSE BIERCE ECCENTRICITY, n. A method of distinction so cheap that fools employ it to accentuate their incapaci...
AMBROSE BIERCE LAND, n. A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property s...
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.
AMBROSE BIERCE Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affai...
AMBROSE BIERCE Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
AMBROSE BIERCE Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth ke...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the wor...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the...
AMBROSE BIERCE Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction ...
AMBROSE BIERCE The best thing to do with the best things in life is to give them up.
AMBROSE BIERCE TELEPHONE n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeab...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and wa...
AMBROSE BIERCE The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of knowledge.
AMBROSE BIERCE