Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings.

Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by committee meetings.

Football features two of the worst aspects of American life, violence and committee meetings.

Football brings out the sociologist that lurks in some otherwise respectable citizens. They say football is a metaphor for America's sinfulness.

Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committee meetings.

You'd look around at meetings, and committee members who could have been his grandchildren wouldn't be there because of things like bad weather. But Porter never missed.