It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean.
Mae West
Related
To be, or not to be, that is the question.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE To be or not to be is not a question of compromise. Either you be or you don't be.
GOLDA MEIR To be or not to be. That's not really a question.
JEAN-LUC GODARD If you don’t have a goal and don’t know where you want to be and when you want be there. You are...
AHMED ALI ANJUM To be rich simply means,to be able to meet people's need.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) when your heart touched mine,I knew then we were one.
THERESA M WILSON To be rich simply means to be beneficial to others.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) More than any woman I ever knew, she comforted.' -Mrs. Huxley about Emma
DEBORAH HEILIGMAN That's silly,' said Martha. 'Friends should always tell each other the truth.
JAMES MARSHALL Kindness is the essence of greatness and the fundamental characteristic of the noblest men and women...
JOSEPH B. WIRTHLIN In this long eternal quest to be more like our Savior, may we try to be “perfect” men and women ...
JEFFREY R. HOLLAND And we learned that you don't have to be famous or rich or physically healthy to be a leader. You ju...
JOAN BAUER There is no tomorrow to remember if we don’t do something today, and to live most fully today, we ...
THOMAS S. MONSON Beauty—real everlasting beauty—lives not on our faces, but in our attitude and our actions. It l...
JUSTINA CHEN When there is no reason to be happy, that's all the reason you need to happy
SOTONYE ANGA Be who you want to be not what others think you should be.
BILAL SAIF Do I have the courage of being a ruthless man to myself with the complete knowledge on my manner or ...
FEREIDOON YAZDI The sad heart needs work to do.
JOAN BAUER Most powerful of all powers in its holy insinuation is _being_. _To be_ is more powerful than even _...
GEORGE MACDONALD To be mad is worse than not to be if this is what it is.
JOHNNY RICH Hamlet's Cat's Soliloquy
"To go outside, and there perchance to stay
Or to re...
HENRY N. BEARD Meant to be" allows for lazy. The idea of destiny alleviates anxiety; it comforts us. We stop believ...
STEPHANIE KLEIN To be or not to be isn't the question. The question is how to prolong being.
TOM ROBBINS How to be wealthy;Birth an idea & then take it to the market place & believe that the market place w...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) It's a sheer and an utter nonsense to even think or imagine that a person can gain and retain people...
ANUJ SOMANY How to be perfect;Think nothing,say nothing & do nothing.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) How to be Great;The moment you realize & accept the ordinary fact that those doing great things toda...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) How to be great;Think of a gigantic & unheard of idea to birth & nurture & inside it lies your great...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Stay true to yourself.Take everyday challenge in your stride & strive to make journey of life exactl...
DR ANIL KUMAR SINHA Be true to yourself.Give wings of confidence & courage to your endeavour. Your strength is reflected...
DR ANIL KUMAR SINHA Like the vital rudder of a ship, we have been provided a way to determine the direction we travel. T...
THOMAS S. MONSON Be true to yourself.Let your belief & thoughts for right cause are not compromised at any cost thoug...
DR ANIL KUMAR SINHA Just because you love someone doesn't mean you're meant to be together.
MICHAELA D. If you can put your mind to it anything can be achieved but to pull something out of nothing althoug...
GARY F EVANS... There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the p...
EPICTETUS We must be more and more to each other, my dear wife.' -Charles Darwin to wife Emma upon loss of dau...
DEBORAH HEILIGMAN I wish you knew how I value you; and what an inexpressible blessing it is to have one whom one can a...
DEBORAH HEILIGMAN I've been doing a lot of thinking about you lately. Mae West, You must be awful tired.
MAE WEST Not everyone has the time to be normal.
LJUPKA CVETANOVA Kindness is universal. Sometimes being kind allows others to see the goodness in humanity through yo...
GERMANY KENT Remember that yours is not the only heart that may be wishing for love.
CAMERON DOKEY How do you do, Miss West? Mae West: How do you do what?
MAE WEST either you get eaten by a wolf today or else the shepherd saves you from the wolf so he can sell you...
OGDEN NASH When you give, you will be blessed. When you give, it will be given back to you.
CRAIG GROESCHEL Do you love me as the person that I am now, or do you love me as the person I used to be?
ANTHONY T. HINCKS Be kind. We never know what people are going through. Give grace and mercy because one day your circ...
GERMANY KENT When women go wrong, men go right after them. -Mae West.
MAE WEST Sheep don’t need the shepherd to be what they are. The shepherd needs sheep to be what he is.
LJUPKA CVETANOVA Well, I have lost you; and I lost you fairly;
In my own way, and with my full consent.
Say...
EDNA ST. VINCENT MILLAY Each of us is under a divinely spoken obligation to reach out with pardon and mercy and to forgive o...
DIETER F. UCHTDORF I could not sit seriously down to write a serious Romance under any other motive than to save my lif...
JANE AUSTEN Human is what he decides to be.
ZAMAN ALI Because I want to be remembered.
SHERMAN ALEXIE A proverb in the Old Testament states: 'He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he t...
GORDON B. HINCKLEY Our opportunities to give of ourselves are indeed limitless, but they are also perishable. There are...
THOMAS S. MONSON So this is going to be drill!?
DEYTH BANGER Is," "is," "is"—the idiocy of the word haunts me. If it were abolished, human thought might begin ...
ROBERT ANTON WILSON The Lord gives us a spirit of hope and a feeling of comfort and confidence that we can overcome the ...
L. LIONEL KENDRICK The heart that gives thanks is a happy one, for we cannot feel thankful and unhappy at the same time...
DOUGLAS WOOD What men and women need is encouragement. Their natural resisting powers should be strengthened, not...
ELEANOR H. PORTER If you can BE your way through it, you can find your way to it.
SUZETTE VEARNON People know your tragedies and they treat you like
you’re not human. Like you’re a three-h...
ERIC JEROME DICKEY There's nothing stupid about wanting to be loved. Believe me.
NINA LACOUR Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then ...
JOSEPH SMITH JR. Many people have asked me, 'How do you make a single life a happy one? My answer is, 'Create the bes...
KRISTEN MCMAIN OAKS As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints we have a responsibility to make our m...
KRISTEN MCMAIN OAKS If you want to be happy or if you want to be miserable—either way is your choice. So choose to be ...
DEBASISH MRIDHA Be nice to people... maybe it'll be unappreciated, unreciprocated, or ignored, but spread the love a...
GERMANY KENT I know that David Tennant's Hamlet isn't till July. And lots of people are going to be doing Dr Who ...
NEIL GAIMAN If you are unable to laugh, then look for a clown or comedian
SOTONYE ANGA If you are feeling constrained by a group that you belong to, ask yourself,
“How can I partic...
GINA GREENLEE Marry me. Nay, marriage will cost us precious moments together. Let us make sweet, passionate love r...
KIERSTEN WHITE For me, happiness is waking up excited even though you have no particular place to go…..
CHERYL RUSHTON You can BE, DO, and HAVE ...absolutely ANYTHING you really, really want to BE, DO, and HAVE.
LORRIN L. LEE Those who have a strong sense of love and belonging have the courage to be imperfect.
BRENé BROWN Oh, Miss West, I've heard so much about you. Mae West: Yeah, honey, but you can't prove a thing.
MAE WEST The quest of the Inner Ring will break your hearts unless you break it. But if you break it, a surpr...
C.S. LEWIS To date or not to date that is the question. It's almost as important as Shakespeare's to be...
AL GOLDSTEIN I've got to be honest, there's no pleasure when you're working.
DANA PLATO This is your moment. You're meant to be here.
HERB BROOKS It's important to remember that, first and foremost, if not only, this is entertainment. 'Th...
AARON SORKIN A plumber's idea of Cleopatra [Mae West].
W. C. FIELDS If you were to ask everyone what 'Hamlet' was about, they might say, "It's about a ...
ORLANDO BLOOM I have to be honest - I don't love guns.
VANESSA FERLITO The game is meant to be fun.
JACK NICKLAUS You must remember that you are my prime treasure (and always have been).'
Emma Darwin to husban...
DEBORAH HEILIGMAN It is almost impossible for anyone, even the most ineffective among us, to continue to choose misery...
WILLIAM GLASSER It is as impossible for a man to be cheated by any one but himself, as for a thing to be and not to ...
RALPH WALDO EMERSON Ah, much deluded! lay aside
Thy threats, and anger misapplied!
Art not afraid with sounds ...
JOHN MILTON I know now: what is is all that matters. Not the thing you know is meant to be, not what could be, n...
AUGUSTEN BURROUGHS I judge the world by my own lights
and I come by my own hand.
CATHERINE MADSEN Every revolution was first a thought in one man's mind, and when the same thought occurs to another ...
RALPH WALDO EMERSON GoodReads is fabulous fun, so interesting, so useful ... and the best reviewers are so loving and il...
WILLIAM DONELSON The gamecock proudly stepped into the slaughterhouse.
TOBA BETA A coin is examined, and only after careful deliberation, given to a beggar, whereas a child is flung...
PETER WESSEL ZAPFFE I'm often uncomfortable with girliness, to be honest.
ELIZABETH REASER Tell me why it feels like you're a part of my soul?
CASSANDRA GIOVANNI When the truth spills it can be hard to clean up
SHANE ALLEN SMITH Nothing can save something that is not meant to be, no matter how hard you try.
BIPASHA BASU When I judged, I wanted them to work clean. When in doubt, throw it out. I think comics don't need t...
DAVE PETITJEAN
More Mae West
She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
MAE WEST I always say, keep a diary and someday it'll keep you.
MAE WEST Keep a diary, and someday it'll keep you.
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
MAE WEST Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but no sale at the box office.
MAE WEST I never loved another person the way I loved myself.
MAE WEST A man in love is like a clipped coupon -- it's time to cash in.
MAE WEST It's not the men in my life that counts, it's the life in my men.
MAE WEST When women go wrong, men go right after them. -Mae West.
MAE WEST Men are my hobby, if I ever got married I'd have to give it up.
MAE WEST So many men, so little time.
MAE WEST Women are as old as they feel and men are old when they lose their feelings.
MAE WEST When women go wrong, men go right after them.
MAE WEST I believe that it's better to be looked over than it is to be overlooked.
MAE WEST Ladies who play with fire must remember that smoke gets in their eyes.
MAE WEST I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.
MAE WEST Marriage is a fine institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
MAE WEST He who hesitates is last.
MAE WEST Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.
MAE WEST Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
MAE WEST Sex is an emotion in motion.
MAE WEST Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
MAE WEST His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.
MAE WEST I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.
MAE WEST He who hesitates is a damned fool.
MAE WEST Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere.
MAE WEST I'm single because I was born that way.
MAE WEST I only like two kinds of men; domestic and foreign.
MAE WEST I go for two kinds of men. The kind with muscles, and the kind without.
MAE WEST A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.
MAE WEST My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you're boned,...
MAE WEST When you get the personality, you don't need the nudity.
MAE WEST It ain't sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
MAE WEST Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right now ju...
MAE WEST When I have to choose between two evils, I always try to pick the one I haven't tried before.
MAE WEST Goodness had nothing to do with it, dearie.
MAE WEST You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
MAE WEST It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
MAE WEST My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you're boned,...
MAE WEST There are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.
MAE WEST Keep a diary, and someday it'll keep you.
MAE WEST The best way to learn to be a lady is to see how other ladies do it.
MAE WEST I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.
MAE WEST I wrote the story myself. It's all about a girl who lost her reputation but never missed it.
MAE WEST You're never too old to become younger
MAE WEST Nobody dies from lack of sex. It's lack of love we die from.
MAE WEST Sex is an emotion in motion
MAE WEST It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
MAE WEST Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.
MAE WEST I speak two languages, Body and English.
MAE WEST You are doing your best only when you are trying to improve what you are doing
MAE WEST The best way to behave is to misbehave.
MAE WEST The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
MAE WEST You can do what you want, but saving love doesn't bring any interest.
MAE WEST A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.
MAE WEST When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
MAE WEST You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, ...
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it
MAE WEST To err is human - but it feels divine
MAE WEST An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.
MAE WEST There are no good girls gone wrong - just bad girls found out.
MAE WEST Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.
MAE WEST I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
MAE WEST Men are all alike--except the one you've met who's different.
MAE WEST Men are easy to get but hard to keep.
MAE WEST Few men know how to kiss well. Fortunately, I've always had time to teach them.
MAE WEST Kiss and make up--but too much makeup has ruined many a kiss.
MAE WEST I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself
MAE WEST It's not what I do, but the way I do it. It's not what I say, but the way I say it.
MAE WEST When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
MAE WEST Dating should be less about matching outward circumstances than meeting your inner necessity.
MAE WEST Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
MAE WEST Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
MAE WEST When I'm good, I'm very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
MAE WEST Say what you want about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
MAE WEST All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
MAE WEST Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right no...
MAE WEST Sex is emotion in motion.
MAE WEST A man's kiss is his signature.
MAE WEST Personality is the glitter that sends your little gleam across the footlights and the orchestra pit ...
MAE WEST Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
MAE WEST I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
MAE WEST I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing can be taxing.
MAE WEST She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!
MAE WEST You are never too old to become younger!
MAE WEST Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
MAE WEST If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.
MAE WEST A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.
MAE WEST When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
MAE WEST I used to be Snow White -- but I drifted.
MAE WEST A man in the house is worth two on the street.
MAE WEST I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.
MAE WEST A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
MAE WEST I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them.
MAE WEST Love thy neighbor - and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much eas...
MAE WEST Women with pasts interest men... they hope history will repeat itself.
MAE WEST Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
MAE WEST Saving love doesn't bring any interest.
MAE WEST 'Why don't you come up sometime 'n see me? I'm home every evening.... Come up. I'll tell your fortun...
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but no sales at the box office.
MAE WEST You're never too old to become younger.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing is wonderful.
MAE WEST Don't cry for a man who's left you, the next one may fall for your smile.
MAE WEST I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
MAE WEST Love isn't an emotion or an instinct--it's an art.
MAE WEST I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.
MAE WEST It takes two to get one in trouble.
MAE WEST An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away
MAE WEST Women with "pasts" interest men because men hope that history will repeat itself.
MAE WEST Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but has no sale at the box office.
MAE WEST His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork
MAE WEST Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.
MAE WEST Love thy neighbor -- and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much ea...
MAE WEST It's not what you can do, but the way you do it that counts.
MAE WEST A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
MAE WEST Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.
MAE WEST Cultivate your curves--they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
MAE WEST Look your best--who said love is blind?
MAE WEST You may admire a girl's curves on the first introduction, but the second meeting shows up new angles...
MAE WEST I like a man who's good, but not too good--for the good die young, and I hate a dead one.
MAE WEST Oh, Miss West, I've heard so much about you. Mae West: Yeah, honey, but you can't prove a thing.
MAE WEST To err is human, but it feels divine.
MAE WEST A man has more character in his face at forty than at twenty--he has suffered longer.
MAE WEST I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.
MAE WEST I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
MAE WEST I've been in more laps than a napkin.
MAE WEST Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
MAE WEST It's not the men in your life that matters, it's the life in your men.
MAE WEST To err is human - but it feels divine.
MAE WEST It's all right for a perfect stranger to kiss your hand as long as he's perfect.
MAE WEST Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else
MAE WEST Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
MAE WEST Loves conquers all things except poverty and toothache. -Mae West.
MAE WEST It ain't sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
MAE WEST Flattery will get you everywhere.
MAE WEST Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
MAE WEST Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else.
MAE WEST The best way to find your perfect match is to meet love halfway.
MAE WEST Don't marry a man to reform him--that's what reform schools are for.
MAE WEST When I'm good I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.
MAE WEST Girls, give all your gentlemen friends an even break, even if you have to break them in the attempt.
MAE WEST I'm no angel, but I've spread my wings a bit.
MAE WEST Love thy neighbor--and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easi...
MAE WEST Some women pick men to marry--and others pick them to pieces.
MAE WEST I've been in more laps than a napkin.
MAE WEST Too many girls follow the line of least resistance--but a good line is hard to resist.
MAE WEST There are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
MAE WEST Loves conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
MAE WEST It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do...
MAE WEST I don't know a lot about politics, but I can recognise a good party man when I see one
MAE WEST Personally, I like two types of men--domestic and foreign.
MAE WEST He's the kind of man who picks his friends...to pieces.
MAE WEST When choosing between two evils, I always like to take the one I've never tried before
MAE WEST You ain't no oil paintin' but you are a fascinatin' monster.
MAE WEST I was Snow White but I drifted.
MAE WEST [Per Alexander Pope (1734):] Vice is a monster of so frightful mien/As to be hated, needs but to be ...
MAE WEST [Nov. 30-Dec. 10:] Dirty Blonde ... I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.
MAE WEST Women want certain things in marriage--the right to a title and a front seat in the lap of luxury.
MAE WEST Some men are all right in their place--if they only knew the right places!
MAE WEST Success is a two-bladed golden sword; it knights one and stabs one at the same time.
MAE WEST (During a trial in which she was accused of indecency on stage)Judge: 'Miss West, are you trying to ...
MAE WEST Men? Sure, I've known lots of them. But I never found one I liked well enough to marry. Besides, I'v...
MAE WEST Volunteer activities can foster enormous leadership skills. The non professional volunteer world is ...
MAE WEST Life's just a merry-go-round. Come on up. You might get a brass ring.
MAE WEST Let men see what's coming to them, and women will get what's coming to them.
MAE WEST One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it.
MAE WEST Ohhhhh! I feel like a million but, I'll take'em one at a time!
MAE WEST I've been doing a lot of thinking about you lately. Mae West, You must be awful tired.
MAE WEST I'd give half my life for just one kiss. Mae West: Then kiss me twice.
MAE WEST I only like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
MAE WEST I believe in the single standard for men and women.
MAE WEST I believe in censorship. After all, I made a fortune out of it.
MAE WEST Virtue has its own reward, but no box office.
MAE WEST A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him two--that's subtraction.
MAE WEST I'm tired, send one of them home
MAE WEST Give a man a free hand and he'll try to put it all over you.
MAE WEST Do not marry a man to reform him. That is what reform schools are for.
MAE WEST Whenever I have to choose between two evils, I always like to try the one I haven't tried before.
MAE WEST I can always tell a lady when I see one. Yeah? What do you tell 'em?
MAE WEST I always say, keep a diary, and some day it'll keep you.
MAE WEST No gold-digging for me... I take diamonds! We may be off the gold standard someday.
MAE WEST A man in the house is worth two in the street.
MAE WEST I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.
MAE WEST Don't come crawlin' to a man for love--he likes to get a run for his money.
MAE WEST A man's kiss is his signature.
MAE WEST Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
MAE WEST I've been rich and I've been poor. Believe me, rich is better.
MAE WEST I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number of carats in a diamond.
MAE WEST The score never interested me, only the game.
MAE WEST The curve is more powerful than the sword.
MAE WEST Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
MAE WEST Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.
MAE WEST He who hesitates is last
MAE WEST Experience is by far the best teacher. You know, ever since I was a little girl I knew that if you l...
MAE WEST I take it out in the open and laugh at it.
MAE WEST