One who is in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
Ambrose Bierce
Related
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.” ~ Ambrose ...
J.J. MCAVOY No formal course in fiction-writing can equal a close and observant perusal of the stories of Edgar ...
H. P. LOVECRAFT This isn't a man who is leaving with his head between his legs
DAN QUAYLE A man thinks as well through his legs and arms as this brain.
HENRY DAVID THOREAU A Radical is a man with both feet firmly planted--in the air. A Conservative is a man with two perfe...
FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT One who thinks for himself is a threat to his enemies, a refuge to his acquaintances, a prize to his...
MATSHONA DHLIWAYO At the end of the day, we need a leader who thinks with his head but leads with his heart.
GRESHAM BARRETT In the morning a man walks with his whole body; in the evening, only with his legs.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make. �...
VICE PRESIDENT DAN QUAYLE Today A woman is one who tries to bring a man down. A man is one who has to keep that woman in check...
APURVA GAGLANI His body was blown in half, his head went one way and his legs the other.
ARIEH SHARON A man who is wise is only as wise as his wife thinks he is.
VIKRANT PARSAI A statesman is he who thinks in the future generations, and a politician is he who thinks in the upc...
ABRAHAM LINCOLN A simple fuck is one thing, but let a man sleep with you just once and he thinks he can bring his do...
MICHEL FABER A man who thinks he is smarter than his wife, has a very smart wife!
UNKNOWN A Kerry footballer with an inferiority complex is one who thinks he's just as good as everybody ...
JOHN B. KEANE Just then the door flew open, and Ambrose burst through, yelling like a madman and swinging a battle...
AMY PLUM Every one stretcheth his legges according to his coverlet.
[Every one stretches his legs according...
GEORGE HERBERT Who thinks Lewis appreciates his car more?
TAVIS SMILEY The average man is more interested in a woman who is interested in him than he is in a woman with be...
MARLENE DIETRICH A prude is a person who thinks that his own rules of propriety are natural laws.
ROBERT A. HEINLEIN He's the one guy we've had who has been a little sore in the legs.
FLIP SAUNDERS His body is second to winning, no questions asked, because he does whatever it takes. He's one of th...
STEVE SULLIVAN A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is one who hopes they are.
CHAUNCEY DEPEW History is a guide to navigation in perilous times. History is who we are and why we are the way we ...
DAVID C. MCCULLOUGH History is a guide to navigation in perilous times. History is who we are and why we are the way we ...
DAVID MCCULLOUGH Bond believes we are his pawns. He thinks no-one observes his game. But I am No-One. I observe every...
ALAN MOORE The world is so empty if one thinks only of mountains, rivers & cities; but to know someone who ...
JOHANN WOLFGANG VON GOETHE One thing that's important to remember is that these are individual patients -- your son or daughter...
JENNIFER ZELMER I knew he'd be a natural runner with the power he has in his legs.
GREG MARTZ Never trust a man with short legs-his brains are too near his bottom
NOEL COWARD There is no one luckier than he who thinks himself so
GERMAN PROVERB Anybody who thinks talk is cheap never argued with a traffic cop.
UNKNOWN By the side of the everlasting Why there is a Yes--a transitory Yes if you like, but a Yes.
E.M. FORSTER As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.
BIBLE We consider that any man who can fiddle all through one of those Virginia Reels without losing his g...
MARK TWAIN Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his or her o...
WILLIAM THOMAS What's his name, the number 10, the small one who doesn't play in the Real Madrid first team. This m...
CARLOS ALBERTO The indolence I love is not that of a lazy fellow who sits with his arms across in total inaction, a...
JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU A man who thinks too much about his ancestors is like a potato-the best part of him is underground.
HENRY S. F. COOPER One of his legs was shorter than the other one. But his spine was also crooked and it drew his hip u...
DARYL NEWCOMB The great man who thinks greatly of himself, is not diminishing
that greatness in heaping fuel on h...
ISAAC D'ISRAELI A leader should learn to always have emergency words in his archive,because emergency situation may ...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs, who has never learned to walk.
FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT You want to talk about a matter of inches. No one was more distraught than Ambrose after that game.
CHARLIE WEIS His brother, he thinks, was in love with everyone he knew.
JOHN COREY WHALEY Freedom is always and exclusively freedom for the one who thinks differently.
ROSA LUXEMBURG Freedom is always and exclusively freedom for the one who thinks differently
ROSA LUXEMBURG A poor person is one who always thinks that he is being judged by whatever he does.
VIKRANT PARSAI Well, Valek, any new promotions?” the Commander asked
“No. But Maren shows promise. Unfortu...
MARIA V. SNYDER Failure is instructive. The person who really thinks learns quite as much from his failures as from ...
JOHN DEWEY Failure is instructive. The person who really thinks learns quite as much from his failures as from ...
ROGER VON OECH The lunatic is the man who lives in a small world but thinks it is a large one; he is the man who li...
G. K. CHESTERTON The true barbarian is he who thinks everything barbarous but his own tastes and prejudices.
WILLIAM HAZLITT A ploughman on his legs is higher than a gentleman on his knees
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN SLANG, n. The grunt of the human hog (_Pignoramus intolerabilis_) with an audible memory. The speech...
AMBROSE BIERCE In that country, all people live in fear psychosis: a doctor thinks that his milkman is providing hi...
DR HITESH C SHETH The man who prays is the one who thinks that god has arranged matters all wrong, but who also thinks...
CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS My mother thinks I'm a national treasure. She's the only one who thinks my Golden Kela award...
CYRUS BROACHA No one can be a great thinker who does not recognize that as a thinker it is his first duty to follo...
JOHN STUART MILL The woman who thinks she is intelligent demands equal rights with men. A woman who is intelligent do...
SIDONIE GABRIELLE COLETTE As for those who disbelieve, their deeds are like a mirage in a desert. The thirsty one thinks it to...
ANONYMOUS A general who thinks they are in control is a fool!
THOMAS WALLACE SCHERZER One had both legs blown off. He has no legs. Another was in a tank going along, or in a jeep, and hi...
ANNALISA HODGKINS I'd watch your mouth", he said, tilting his head as he looked at my ID."The last lunker who laughed ...
KIM HARRISON A pitcher is only as good as his legs.
EARLY WYNN An individualist is one who pays his taxes with a smile
AL DIAMOND Any woman who thinks the way to a man's heart is through his stomach is aiming about 10 inches too h...
ADRIENNE GUSOFF Any woman who thinks the way to a man's heart is through his stomach is aiming about 10 inches too h...
ADRIENNE E. GUSOFF I have been judged to be a pessimist but what abyss of ignorance and low egoism is not hidden in one...
EUGENIO MONTALE But in answer to your question about the conspiracy angle, I think that any historian worth his salt...
OLIVER STONE A true friend is one who thinks you are a good egg even if you are half-cracked.
ASHISH KUMAR When one is in love one thinks only of one.
WILL ADVISE When a man thinks, there is a spot of fire alive in his mind—and it’s proper that he should have...
AYN RAND Anybody who thinks that getting a communication from a voter in your district is spam - that guy is ...
DICK MORRIS A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned to walk forward...
FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT As he thinks in his heart, so he is.
JEWISH PROVERB His legs are one of his strong points. I was just trying to stay away from his legs as much as possi...
KYLE DOHERTY He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his ...
WILLIAM THOMAS Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop. -Henny Youngman.
HENNY YOUNGMAN Faith is a fine invention
For gentlemen who see;
But Microscopes are prudent
In an emerg...
EMILY DICKINSON A strength to harm is perilous in the hand of an ambitious head.
ELIZABETH I As a man thinks in his heart, so is he. Proverbs 23:7
BIBLE As a man thinks in his heart, so is he. [Proverbs 23:7]
BIBLE As a man thinks in his heart, so is he. [Proverbs 23:7].
BIBLE Only the man who thinks himself a fool is as wise as he thinks.
CRISS JAMI A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk for...
FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT He who thinks by not talking to his wife or girlfriend can make her realize and apologize for her mi...
ANUJ SOMANY The world is so empty if one thinks only of mountains, rivers and cities; but to know someone here a...
JOHANN VON GOETHE The world is so empty if one thinks only of mountains, rivers and cities; but to know someone here a...
JOHANN WOLFGANG VON GOETHE Kindness and compassion go hand in hand. One who mistakes them as a weakness is far less than the or...
MAICHEE SUMMER His legs are in real good shape.
TONY LA RUSSA When a mute man sins, it's not with his tongue.
When a blind man sins, it's not with his eyes.
When ...
KIMTO OCHE EMMANUEL Sorry is the fool who trades his soul for a corvette Thinks he'll get the girl he'll only get the me...
EDDIE VEDDER In Bosnia, little children shot in the head by a guy who thinks it's okay to aim his gun at a ch...
CHRISTIANE AMANPOUR Let a bill, or law, be read, in the one branch or the other, every one instantly thinks how it will ...
EZRA STILES No other being is lesser human than the one who thinks of others as such.
ABHIJIT NASKAR
More Ambrose Bierce
Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the e...
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
AMBROSE BIERCE Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for,...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Suffrage, noun. Expression of opinion by means of a ballot. The right of suffrage (which is held to ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Doubt is the father of invention.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
AMBROSE BIERCE Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.
AMBROSE BIERCE Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
AMBROSE BIERCE Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Liberty:one of imaginations most precious possessions.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant: a person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bone.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE OCEAN, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man -- who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZEAL, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. A passion that goeth b...
AMBROSE BIERCE For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His e...
AMBROSE BIERCE Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understand...
AMBROSE BIERCE Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
AMBROSE BIERCE You don't have to be stupid to be a Christian, ... but it probably helps.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no g...
AMBROSE BIERCE Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
AMBROSE BIERCE The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, m...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bride. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking th...
AMBROSE BIERCE Learning. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consult. To seek another's approval of a course already decided on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Happiness is an agreeable sensation, arising from contemplating the misery of others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance: a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate ...
AMBROSE BIERCE An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Let me tell you what a writer is. A writer takes comprehensive views, holds large convictions, makes...
AMBROSE BIERCE Corporation. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
AMBROSE BIERCE Don't steal; thou it never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
AMBROSE BIERCE Philanthropist. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his co...
AMBROSE BIERCE Age. That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no...
AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against one's fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Education is that which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understan...
AMBROSE BIERCE Destiny. A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
AMBROSE BIERCE Erudition. Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint. A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurrection. An unsuccessful revolution; disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad gover...
AMBROSE BIERCE Revolution is an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation. The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.
AMBROSE BIERCE A prejudice is a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
AMBROSE BIERCE Bigot, one who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
AMBROSE BIERCE Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly un...
AMBROSE BIERCE Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration t...
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiration; is our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
AMBROSE BIERCE To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.
AMBROSE BIERCE A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCE All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
AMBROSE BIERCE A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves a glorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Peace, in international affairs, is a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE An optimist is a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
AMBROSE BIERCE As records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolen...
AMBROSE BIERCE Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politeness -- The most acceptable hypocrisy.
AMBROSE BIERCE A man is known by the company he organizes.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapaciti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Enthusiasm. A distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward ap...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
AMBROSE BIERCE An egotist is a person interested in himself than in me!
AMBROSE BIERCE Duty. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.
AMBROSE BIERCE Opiate. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurance: An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comforta...
AMBROSE BIERCE Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.
AMBROSE BIERCE Alien. An American sovereign in his probationary state.
AMBROSE BIERCE Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Mis...
AMBROSE BIERCE Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is please...
AMBROSE BIERCE Wit. The salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
AMBROSE BIERCE A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impartial. Unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a cont...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the worl...
AMBROSE BIERCE Physician -- One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce. A resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consul. In American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is give...
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscien...
AMBROSE BIERCE A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Confidante. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is ...
AMBROSE BIERCE A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.
AMBROSE BIERCE An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.
AMBROSE BIERCE To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.
AMBROSE BIERCE An account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly k...
AMBROSE BIERCE Historian. A broad -- gauge gossip.
AMBROSE BIERCE Habit is a shackle for the free.
AMBROSE BIERCE Laughter -- An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.
AMBROSE BIERCE Appeal. In law, to put the dice into the box for another throw.
AMBROSE BIERCE Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, ad...
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience. The wisdom that enables us to recognize in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly tha...
AMBROSE BIERCE The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.
AMBROSE BIERCE When in Rome, do as Rome does.
AMBROSE BIERCE To be positive: to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Censor, n. An officer of certain governments, employed to supress the works of genius. Among the Rom...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bore -- a person who talks when you wish him to listen.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by frie...
AMBROSE BIERCE Irreligion. The principal one of the great faiths of the world.
AMBROSE BIERCE Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things withou...
AMBROSE BIERCE Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
AMBROSE BIERCE Genealogy. An account of one's descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Absurdity. A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abstainer. A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Woman absent is woman dead.
AMBROSE BIERCE The covers of this book are too far apart.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abscond. To move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their deso...
AMBROSE BIERCE A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE Conservative. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a Liberal, who wi...
AMBROSE BIERCE The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Alliance. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserte...
AMBROSE BIERCE ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply in...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intima...
AMBROSE BIERCE ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn."Eat ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
AMBROSE BIERCE Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
AMBROSE BIERCE International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smoulde...
AMBROSE BIERCE DIPLOMACY, n. Lying in state, or the patriotic art of lying for one's country.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds. Misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
AMBROSE BIERCE There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
AMBROSE BIERCE FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZOOLOGY, n. The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly ("Mus...
AMBROSE BIERCE HIPPOGRIFF, n. An animal (now extinct) which was half horse and half griffin. The griffin was a com...
AMBROSE BIERCE ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A m...
AMBROSE BIERCE YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander. In the So...
AMBROSE BIERCE Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscie...
AMBROSE BIERCE OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was onc...
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled wh...
AMBROSE BIERCE When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover.
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity seems destined to play a most important part in the arts and industries. The question of...
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
AMBROSE BIERCE ECCENTRICITY, n. A method of distinction so cheap that fools employ it to accentuate their incapaci...
AMBROSE BIERCE LAND, n. A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property s...
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.
AMBROSE BIERCE Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affai...
AMBROSE BIERCE Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
AMBROSE BIERCE Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth ke...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the wor...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the...
AMBROSE BIERCE Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction ...
AMBROSE BIERCE The best thing to do with the best things in life is to give them up.
AMBROSE BIERCE TELEPHONE n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeab...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and wa...
AMBROSE BIERCE The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of knowledge.
AMBROSE BIERCE