Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
Ambrose Bierce
Related
Optimist, n. A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE An optimist is a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE OPTIMIST, n. A proponent of the doctrine that black is white. A pessimist applied to God for relief.
AMBROSE BIERCE OPTIMIST, n. A proponent of the doctrine that black is white. A pessimist applied to God for relief....
AMBROSE BIERCE There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.” ~ Ambrose ...
J.J. MCAVOY No formal course in fiction-writing can equal a close and observant perusal of the stories of Edgar ...
H. P. LOVECRAFT The United States is not a nation of black and white people. Any fool can see that white people are ...
ALBERT MURRAY A new breed of Republicans has taken over the GOP. It is a new breed which is seeking to sell to Ame...
JACKIE ROBINSON The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make. �...
VICE PRESIDENT DAN QUAYLE Color is the overpowering of black; white – the final victory over black.
DEJAN STOJANOVIC White-on-white crime is a devastation in America like so-called black-on-black crime. It's not b...
MICHAEL ERIC DYSON These kids have grown up together, and they see that all races get along well together. We don't see...
LARRY FRAZIER I think that many black people thought this would be a wonderful and extraordinary thing, for a blac...
RANDALL KENNEDY In the beginning it was all black and white.
MAUREEN O'HARA America is as much a black country as a white one. The lives and destinies of the white American are...
AMIRI BARAKA Some white people hate black people, and some white people love black people, some black people hate...
EDEN AHBEZ A hoodie is worn by everybody: kids, white men, white women, black men. But it clings to the black b...
CLAUDIA RANKINE The power of the white world is threatened whenever a black man refuses to accept the white world's ...
JAMES ARTHUR BALDWIN Black and white is abstract; color is not. Looking at a black and white photograph, you are already ...
JOEL STERNFELD Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men ...
TIGER WOODS Some white people hate black people, and some white people love black people, some black people hate...
EDEN AHBEZ I don't see a white woman. I see a black woman, even though my mother is white [her father Jerome is...
HALLE BERRY To describe something as being black and white means it is clearly defined. Yet when your ethnicity ...
MEGHAN MARKLE A white face goes with a white mind. Occasionally a black face goes with a white mind. Very seldom a...
NIKKI GIOVANNI Everyone is a proponent of strong encryption.
DOROTHY DENNING The perceived wisdom is that people do not go in large numbers to black-and-white movies anymore - w...
SAM MENDES The power of the white world is threatened whenever a black man refuses to accept the white world...
JAMES A. BALDWIN Jazz is a white term to define black people. My music is black classical music.
NINA SIMONE I don't trust white critics' judgment about most things that deal with black life, particularly when...
TERRY MCMILLAN Black is the color of night. White is the true color of death
MELISSA DE LA CRUZ She was the blackest white woman in the world. She was a white woman passing for black in a black wo...
LARRY LESTER This is a new doctrine, coming straight from the secretary of transportation and the White House. I ...
CLARENCE DITLOW She was not a white woman. She was not a Greek... Until the emergence of the doctrine of white super...
JOHN HENRIK CLARKE In this country, there is a segregation of Black Turks and White Turks. Your brother Tayyip belongs ...
RECEP TAYYIP ERDOGAN The perceived wisdom is that people do not go in large numbers to black-and-white movies anymore - w...
SAM MENDES Empathy is the new measurement of everything. It doesn't matter what religion you have, what God you...
C. JOYBELL C. It is not black people that mess up a city, it is the stupid way white cops react when decent black ...
MARIE MUHAMMAD Human nature is not black and white but black and grey.
GRAHAM GREENE A cloud of white death veiled in black…
JEAN M. GRANT They will swear black is white.
UNKNOWN I think the truth is black-and-white.
NANCY GRACE Robert of Lincoln is gayly drest,
Wearing a bright black wedding-coat;
White are his shoulders...
WILLIAM CULLEN BRYANT As you grow older, you’ll see white men cheat black men every day of your life, but let me tell yo...
HARPER LEE As you grow older, you'll see white men cheat black men every day of your life, but let me tell you ...
HARPER LEE It's a significant question: should black people only adopt black children, and white people whi...
ADEWALE AKINNUOYE-AGBAJE That's why for Zakk Wylde's Black Label Society the colors are black and white. There are no...
ZAKK WYLDE We believe it is comprehensive international sanctions against the white regime that will save us fr...
OLIVER TAMBO My mum is black, my dad is white, and when I was a teenager, people would say, 'So what are you?...
FLEUR EAST When we don't have information, we go to the simplest outlook, to black and white. But then we h...
PATRICIA SUN I was a proponent of the ERA.
RUTH BADER GINSBURG A black lie is more acceptable than a hundred white lies
MARIA MAYLINE GRANT One of the things I was excited about, ... is that I get one of those black-and-white things.
LAUREN HOLLY To me, a poem that's in rhyme and meter is the difference between watching a film in full color ...
X. J. KENNEDY I said there was a society of men among us, bred up from their youth in the art of proving by words ...
JONATHAN SWIFT And I also figured out that way I can do a film in black and white because I've never been able to d...
ALEX COX The camera can even capture text and graphics as group 4, the small TIFF protocol used for faxing. I...
JEFF LENGYEL Black cat or white cat, it's a good cat that catches the mice.
SIR WILLIAM WATSON (2) Black and white is refuge of colors from their own nullity.
VIKRMN Black and white is mix of toughest simplicity and easiest complexity.
VIKRMN Black and white creates a strange dreamscape that color never can.
JACK ANTONOFF The vast majority of murdered whites are murdered by other whites. That's why there's no nat...
BEN SHAPIRO His life seemed like a deck of cards, and in the midst of all those two’s and three’s someone ha...
TEKOA MANNING It is an absolutely black-and-white case. It is a clear example of misleading parliament.
HUGH ROBERTSON The incidence of companies that only use black and white printers is declining, and 56% of these com...
MARIANNA GDANIS A lot of black people believe that Jews in this country have become white. They behave like white pe...
TONI MORRISON A large black and white woodpecker flashed off the side of a tree.
DAVID LUNEAU I believe that there is a Matrix and... to be more accurate I am in the Pornography Matrix.
DEYTH BANGER The whole series is black-and-white, so when I went to shoot one of the women I only had black-and-w...
HELMUT NEWTON A black hen lays a white egg.
FRENCH PROVERB I'm not a proponent of it,
SANDY ALDERSON It's just that white students fell faster than black students. This is absolutely the wrong kind of ...
DARIA HALL Boxing is a lot of white men watching two black men beat each other up.
MUHAMMAD ALI Black is not White and Wrong is not Right !
ANTHONY BAHR Black is bountiful. White is witful. Both are beautiful.
INDEEWARA JAYAWARDANE Law in Ukraine is not black and white; it is shades of gray.
BRANDON WEBB Black man cleans the streets but mustn't walk freely on the pavement; Black man must build houses fo...
ES’KIA MPHAHLELE Black and white is heaviest of vibrant and at the same time lightest of achromatic.
VIKRMN Black and white thinking forces a choice between pretending we know everything and believing we know...
TERENCE T. GORSKI Our personal past is only available to us now through black-and-white film, it's a medium for commun...
FRANK LENTRICCHIA Could it be that my circle is largely black and that it is why I am influential in black circles but...
LOUIS FARRAKHAN For grey matter, there is no black and white. If you think in black and white, then you do not use e...
PETEK KABAKCI The world is not that black and white, Rachel. There are no moral absolutes. It is complex.
EMILY GIFFIN Yeah, many can add a small amount of a "white" happiness color
to your "red" simple life color but i...
KAGABO BURANGA JACQUES I'm sick and tired of black and white people of good intent giving aspirin to a society that is dyin...
RALPH ABERNATHY The problem, of course, was that [he] saw the world in black and white. And he got to decide what wa...
KHALED HOSSEINI Jeremiah Wright is one of the greatest prophetic preachers that black America has produced. What I f...
MICHAEL ERIC DYSON It's a white crested, black Polish rooster.
SARAH MILLER Color can do anything that black-and-white can.
VINCENTE MINNELLI It's not white versus black any more, it's haves versus have-nots. Unless the black middle-c...
HENRY LOUIS GATES Back when we was in school in Mississippi, we had Little Black Sambo. That's what you learned: A...
B. B. KING My black-and-white work is more of a celebration, and the color work became more of a critique of so...
MARTIN PARR Oceanic society rests ultimately on the belief that Big Brother is omnipotent and that the Party is ...
GEORGE ORWELL It was the Michael Jordan/Nike phenomenon that really let people see that athletes were OK, and blac...
DAVID STERN I'm a big proponent of harm reduction,
CHUCK CADMAN The mind is like a sheet of white paper in this, that the impressions it receives the oftenest, and ...
JULIUS CHARLES HARE Black and white and grey, all the shades of truth.
GEORGE R.R. MARTIN Mortals. Everything is so black and white to you.
KAMI GARCIA All situations appear black and white when reasoning is disregarded for the sake of identity.
JON CHRISTOPHER GARLAND It was a very acute racial moment. The trial about a black man killing a white woman exacerbated the...
SALIM MUWAKKIL We should always be disposed to believe that that which appears white is really black, if the hierar...
SAINT IGNATIUS
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AMBROSE BIERCE Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Liberty:one of imaginations most precious possessions.
AMBROSE BIERCE Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant: a person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bone.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.
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AMBROSE BIERCE OCEAN, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man -- who has no gills.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
AMBROSE BIERCE The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, m...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bride. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking th...
AMBROSE BIERCE Learning. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consult. To seek another's approval of a course already decided on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Happiness is an agreeable sensation, arising from contemplating the misery of others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Life. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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AMBROSE BIERCE An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty. The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Corporation. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
AMBROSE BIERCE Don't steal; thou it never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Success is the one unpardonable sin against one's fellows.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Destiny. A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pi...
AMBROSE BIERCE Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
AMBROSE BIERCE Erudition. Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint. A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurrection. An unsuccessful revolution; disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad gover...
AMBROSE BIERCE Revolution is an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.
AMBROSE BIERCE Deliberation. The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
AMBROSE BIERCE Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.
AMBROSE BIERCE A prejudice is a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
AMBROSE BIERCE Bigot, one who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
AMBROSE BIERCE Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly un...
AMBROSE BIERCE Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration t...
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiration; is our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
AMBROSE BIERCE To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.
AMBROSE BIERCE A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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AMBROSE BIERCE A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves a glorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Peace, in international affairs, is a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE An optimist is a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
AMBROSE BIERCE As records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolen...
AMBROSE BIERCE Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politeness -- The most acceptable hypocrisy.
AMBROSE BIERCE A man is known by the company he organizes.
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AMBROSE BIERCE Enthusiasm. A distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward ap...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
AMBROSE BIERCE An egotist is a person interested in himself than in me!
AMBROSE BIERCE Duty. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.
AMBROSE BIERCE Opiate. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.
AMBROSE BIERCE Insurance: An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comforta...
AMBROSE BIERCE Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.
AMBROSE BIERCE Alien. An American sovereign in his probationary state.
AMBROSE BIERCE Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Mis...
AMBROSE BIERCE Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is please...
AMBROSE BIERCE Wit. The salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
AMBROSE BIERCE A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man, who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCE Impartial. Unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a cont...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the worl...
AMBROSE BIERCE Physician -- One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
AMBROSE BIERCE Divorce. A resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCE Consul. In American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is give...
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscien...
AMBROSE BIERCE A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be.
AMBROSE BIERCE Confidante. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is ...
AMBROSE BIERCE A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.
AMBROSE BIERCE An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.
AMBROSE BIERCE To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.
AMBROSE BIERCE An account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly k...
AMBROSE BIERCE Historian. A broad -- gauge gossip.
AMBROSE BIERCE Habit is a shackle for the free.
AMBROSE BIERCE Laughter -- An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarti...
AMBROSE BIERCE Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.
AMBROSE BIERCE Appeal. In law, to put the dice into the box for another throw.
AMBROSE BIERCE Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, ad...
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
AMBROSE BIERCE Experience. The wisdom that enables us to recognize in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly tha...
AMBROSE BIERCE The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.
AMBROSE BIERCE When in Rome, do as Rome does.
AMBROSE BIERCE To be positive: to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Censor, n. An officer of certain governments, employed to supress the works of genius. Among the Rom...
AMBROSE BIERCE Bore -- a person who talks when you wish him to listen.
AMBROSE BIERCE Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by frie...
AMBROSE BIERCE Irreligion. The principal one of the great faiths of the world.
AMBROSE BIERCE Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things withou...
AMBROSE BIERCE Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
AMBROSE BIERCE Genealogy. An account of one's descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Absurdity. A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abstainer. A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
AMBROSE BIERCE Woman absent is woman dead.
AMBROSE BIERCE The covers of this book are too far apart.
AMBROSE BIERCE Abscond. To move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.
AMBROSE BIERCE Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their deso...
AMBROSE BIERCE A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE Conservative. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a Liberal, who wi...
AMBROSE BIERCE The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Alliance. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserte...
AMBROSE BIERCE ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply in...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intima...
AMBROSE BIERCE ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn."Eat ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction o...
AMBROSE BIERCE Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
AMBROSE BIERCE Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
AMBROSE BIERCE International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smoulde...
AMBROSE BIERCE DIPLOMACY, n. Lying in state, or the patriotic art of lying for one's country.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds. Misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
AMBROSE BIERCE A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
AMBROSE BIERCE Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
AMBROSE BIERCE There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
AMBROSE BIERCE FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
AMBROSE BIERCE ZOOLOGY, n. The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly ("Mus...
AMBROSE BIERCE HIPPOGRIFF, n. An animal (now extinct) which was half horse and half griffin. The griffin was a com...
AMBROSE BIERCE ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A m...
AMBROSE BIERCE YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander. In the So...
AMBROSE BIERCE Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo
AMBROSE BIERCE Forgetfulness. A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscie...
AMBROSE BIERCE One who is in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.
AMBROSE BIERCE OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was onc...
AMBROSE BIERCE Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact.
AMBROSE BIERCE Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCE QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled wh...
AMBROSE BIERCE When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover.
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity seems destined to play a most important part in the arts and industries. The question of...
AMBROSE BIERCE Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
AMBROSE BIERCE ECCENTRICITY, n. A method of distinction so cheap that fools employ it to accentuate their incapaci...
AMBROSE BIERCE LAND, n. A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property s...
AMBROSE BIERCE The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
AMBROSE BIERCE Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.
AMBROSE BIERCE Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
AMBROSE BIERCE Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affai...
AMBROSE BIERCE Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.
AMBROSE BIERCE Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
AMBROSE BIERCE Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
AMBROSE BIERCE Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
AMBROSE BIERCE Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth ke...
AMBROSE BIERCE Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the wor...
AMBROSE BIERCE Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
AMBROSE BIERCE Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities ...
AMBROSE BIERCE Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the...
AMBROSE BIERCE Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCE Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction ...
AMBROSE BIERCE The best thing to do with the best things in life is to give them up.
AMBROSE BIERCE TELEPHONE n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeab...
AMBROSE BIERCE Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.
AMBROSE BIERCE Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
AMBROSE BIERCE Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
AMBROSE BIERCE Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and wa...
AMBROSE BIERCE The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of knowledge.
AMBROSE BIERCE