Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white.

Optimism. The doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.

OPTIMISM, n. The doctrine, or belief, that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything right that is wrong. It is held with greatest tenacity by those most accustomed to the mischance of falling into adversity, and is most acceptably expounded with the grin that apes a smile. Being a blind faith, it is inaccessible to the light of disproof --an intellectual disorder, yielding to no treatment but death. It is hereditary, but fortunately not contagious.

Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.

Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact

Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.