Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats.


H. L. Mencken

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Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin sl...
H. L. MENCKEN
Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin sl...
H.L. MENCKEN
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin s...
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Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. -H. L. Mencken.
H. L. MENCKEN
As the arteries grow hard, the heart grows soft. -H. L. Mencken.
H. L. MENCKEN
As the arteries grow hard, the heart grows soft. thanks to Alan Bennett -H. L. Mencken.
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Even pirates, before they attack another ship, hoist a black flag.
BELA KIRALY
Is killing a known terrorist wrong? I ask this, did the terrorist allow any of his victims quarter? ...
T.R. WALLACE
Give immediate instruction to all your posts in said territory, under your direction, at no time and...
ZEBULON PIKE
The tattoo is just setting below his hp bone.
H e l l i s e m p t y
a n d a l l t h e d ...
TAHEREH MAFI
Every decent man of our age must be a coward and a slave. That is his normal condition. Of that I am...
FYODOR DOSTOYEVSKY
Ah, much deluded! lay aside
Thy threats, and anger misapplied!
Art not afraid with sounds ...
JOHN MILTON
You've got to S-M-I-L-E
To be H-A-Double-P-Y
SHIRLEY TEMPLE BLACK
Not everyone has the time to be normal.
LJUPKA CVETANOVA
To reform a man, you must begin with his grandmother.
VICTOR HUGO
Though there are some notable exceptions, by and large the persistent ranting of the Warren Commissi...
VINCENT BUGLIOSI
Recite the Periodic Table of Teatime, in correct order, with Elemental Symbols, please.'
A-Thro...
CATHERYNNE M. VALENTE
The concern we have is that if somebody from our side gets captured they are going to get their thro...
JOSE RODRIGUEZ
Both [P. T.] Barnum and H. L. Mencken are said to have made the depressing observation that no one e...
CARL SAGAN
Let every man or woman here, if you never hear me again, remember this, that if you wish to be great...
RUSSEL H. CONWELL
Disclaimer - These opiini^H^H damn! ^H^H ^Q ^[ .... :w :q :wq :wq! ^d X ^? exit X Q ^C ^? :quitbye C...
B. F. SKINNER
On a royal birthday every house must fly a flag, or the owner would be dragged to a police station a...
MARY ANTIN
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TODD COBURN
Be kind. We never know what people are going through. Give grace and mercy because one day your circ...
GERMANY KENT
There is only enough time in this world for me to be me. I don't have time to be anyone else." H,L,S...
SUSIE L HILL
The destinies of many nations are in your hands and you must bring the gospel to every man
SUNDAY ADELAJA
To be, or not to be, that is the question.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
All religions must be tolerated... for every man must get to heaven in his own way.
EPICTETUS
All religions must be tolerated, for every man must get to heaven in his own way.
FREDERICK THE GREAT
All religions must be tolerated... for... every man must get to heaven in his own way.
EPICTETUS
All religions must be tolerated...for...every man must get to heaven in his own way.
FREDERICK II
Every man must play the part of his ambition. If you are trying to be a successful man, you must pla...
ORISON SWETT MARDEN
To value riches is not to be covetous. They are the gift of God, and, like every gift of his, good i...
H. L. WAYLAND
America has been the country of my fond election from the age of thirteen, when I first saw it. I ha...
JOHN PAUL JONES
He turned around and walked toward her and spit on her. He put his hands up and she said, 'Stop' and...
ERICK MCINTOSH
She was turned on by him— his scent, his smile; he was the manifestation of seduction. Under norma...
NORIAN F. LOVE
HELP = H(umor), E-go, edging God out, L-istening, P-urpose
KEN BLANCHARD
HELP = H(umor), E-go, edging God out, L-istening, P-urpose.
KEN BLANCHARD
It is as impossible for a man to be cheated by any one but himself, as for a thing to be and not to ...
RALPH WALDO EMERSON
Kindness is universal. Sometimes being kind allows others to see the goodness in humanity through yo...
GERMANY KENT
Yes! Very funny this terrible thing is. A man that is born falls into a dream like a man who falls i...
JOSEPH CONRAD
To be or not to be. That's not really a question.
JEAN-LUC GODARD
It follows that any commander in chief who undertakes to carry out a plan which he considers defecti...
NAPOLEON BONAPARTE
Liberty is the right of every man to be honest, to think and to speak without hypocrisy.
JOSE MARTI
Every man must get to Heaven his own way.
FREDERICK THE GREAT
If you want to be different, if you want to be better than normal, then you must live differently.
CRAIG GROESCHEL
No normal man ever fell in love after thirty when the kidneys begin to disintegrate.
H. L. MENCKEN
No normal man ever fell in love after 30 when the kidneys begin to disintegrate.
HENRY LOUIS MENCKEN
The sad heart needs work to do.
JOAN BAUER
Most powerful of all powers in its holy insinuation is _being_. _To be_ is more powerful than even _...
GEORGE MACDONALD
To be rich simply means,to be able to meet people's need.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN)
when your heart touched mine,I knew then we were one.
THERESA M WILSON
To be rich simply means to be beneficial to others.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN)
More than any woman I ever knew, she comforted.' -Mrs. Huxley about Emma
DEBORAH HEILIGMAN
That's silly,' said Martha. 'Friends should always tell each other the truth.
JAMES MARSHALL
Kindness is the essence of greatness and the fundamental characteristic of the noblest men and women...
JOSEPH B. WIRTHLIN
In this long eternal quest to be more like our Savior, may we try to be “perfect” men and women ...
JEFFREY R. HOLLAND
And we learned that you don't have to be famous or rich or physically healthy to be a leader. You ju...
JOAN BAUER
There is no tomorrow to remember if we don’t do something today, and to live most fully today, we ...
THOMAS S. MONSON
Beauty—real everlasting beauty—lives not on our faces, but in our attitude and our actions. It l...
JUSTINA CHEN
We must every one be a man of his own fancy.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
Morality is the theory that every h uman act must be either right or wrong, and that 99 % of them a...
H. L. MENCKEN
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
HENRY LOUIS MENCKEN
I see that they put every black man in the movies in a dress at some point in his career.
DAVE CHAPPELLE
Man lives freely only by his readiness to die, if need be, at the hands of his brother, never by kil...
MAHATMA GANDHI
Now it was done. He was free of Xanth forever. Free to make his own life, without being ridiculed or...
PIERS ANTHONY
Do I have the courage of being a ruthless man to myself with the complete knowledge on my manner or ...
FEREIDOON YAZDI
Every man must choose his world.
A.W. TOZER
Every man goes down to his death bearing in his hands only that which he has given away.
PROVERB
I have done it," she says. At first I do not understand. But then I see the tomb, and the marks she ...
MADELINE MILLER
The market is still waiting for HSBC results, which will have a big impact on the direction of the m...
ANDREW TO
Property shares had a technical rebound, but interest rate concerns will still affect properties unt...
ANDREW TO
Bank of China's results were quite good; double-digit growth can be taken as good results for a bank...
ANDREW TO
The index tried to challenge 18,000 but failed, so that triggered profit taking. Tokyo's slide also ...
ANDREW TO
Trading seems to be focusing on selective counters because investors are cautious amid interest rate...
ANDREW TO
We're seeing a minor technical rebound after Wall Street rebounded from two days of losses. The key ...
ANDREW TO
Some investors have returned to pick up the stock at bargain prices.
ANDREW TO
I think the take-up for the placement is not too good and other property developers may be discourag...
ANDREW TO
We are afraid that our freedoms and liberties will be infringed in the future.
ANDREW TO
I think there was some minor selling pressure on telecom stocks as the market continued to see a wea...
ANDREW TO
The basic tenet of black consciousness is that the black man must reject all value systems that seek...
STEVEN BIKO
To be really cosmopolitan, a man must be at home even in his own country.
THOMAS W. HIGGINSON
A man is at his best when he is simply not like the rest in all his life's test
ANUJ SOMANY
A man is at his best when he is simply not like rest in all his life's test
ANUJ SOMANY
A people who have suffered so much for so long at hands of a racist society must draw the line somew...
BOBBY SEALE
Black man cleans the streets but mustn't walk freely on the pavement; Black man must build houses fo...
ES’KIA MPHAHLELE
It depends on the schedule of our needs, which take priority. Liability issues mean waivers must be ...
JEANNE SCHIEFFER
When we are in partnership and have stopped clutching each other's throats, when we have stopped ens...
EUGENE DEBS
Remember that yours is not the only heart that may be wishing for love.
CAMERON DOKEY
Every man must do two things alone; he must do his own believing and his own dying.
MARTIN LUTHER
Every man must bear his own burden.
VINCENT VAN GOGH
A man of politics writes about philosophy: it could be that his "true" philosophy should be looked f...
ANTONIO GRAMSCI
I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES
There must be no majority decisions, but only responsible persons, and the word 'council' must be re...
ADOLF HITLER
In a rich man's house there is no place to spit but his face.
DIOGENES
To survive in peace and harmony, united and strong, we must have one people, one nation, one flag.
PAULINE HANSON
To be or not to be is not a question of compromise. Either you be or you don't be.
GOLDA MEIR
To be mad is worse than not to be if this is what it is.
JOHNNY RICH
Hamlet's Cat's Soliloquy

"To go outside, and there perchance to stay
Or to re...
HENRY N. BEARD
Meant to be" allows for lazy. The idea of destiny alleviates anxiety; it comforts us. We stop believ...
STEPHANIE KLEIN

More H. L. Mencken

Honor is simply the morality of superior men.
H. L. MENCKEN
A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.
H. L. MENCKEN
There is always an easy solution to every problem - neat, plausible, and wrong.
H. L. MENCKEN
Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse.
H. L. MENCKEN
For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.
H. L. MENCKEN
The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.
H. L. MENCKEN
A newspaper is a device for making the ignorant more ignorant and the crazy crazier.
H. L. MENCKEN
A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.
H. L. MENCKEN
Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin sl...
H. L. MENCKEN
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
H. L. MENCKEN
On one issue, at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women.
H. L. MENCKEN
The most valuable of all human possessions, next to a superior and disdainful air, is the reputation...
H. L. MENCKEN
Nothing is so abject and pathetic as a politician who has lost his job, save only a retired stud-hor...
H. L. MENCKEN
A politician is an animal which can sit on a fence and yet keep both ears to the ground.
H. L. MENCKEN
One horse-laugh is worth ten thousand syllogisms. It is not only more effective; it is also vastly ...
H. L. MENCKEN
I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe it is better to be free than to ...
H. L. MENCKEN
Time stays, we go.
H. L. MENCKEN
A nun, at best, is only half a woman, just as a priest is only half a man.
H. L. MENCKEN
The truth is, as every one knows, that the great artists of the world are never Puritans, and seldom...
H. L. MENCKEN
Archbishop -- A Christian ecclesiastic of a rank superior to that attained by Christ.
H. L. MENCKEN
A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to heaven brag about it to persons who wi...
H. L. MENCKEN
All the political seers and sorcerers seem to be agreed that the coming Presidential campaign will b...
H. L. MENCKEN
The time must come inevitably when mankind shall surmount the imbecility of religion, as it has surm...
H. L. MENCKEN
The chief knowledge that a man gets from reading books is the knowledge that very few of them are wo...
H. L. MENCKEN
There are two kinds of books. Those that no one reads and those that no one ought to read.
H. L. MENCKEN
There are people who read too much: bibliobibuli. I know some who are constantly drunk on books, as ...
H. L. MENCKEN
War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adr...
H. L. MENCKEN
Love is an emotion that is based on an opinion of women that is impossible for those who have had an...
H. L. MENCKEN
Love is the delusion that one man or woman differs from another.
H. L. MENCKEN
To be in love is merely to be in a perpetual state of anesthesia.
H. L. MENCKEN
I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function achieved which a cow enjoys...
H. L. MENCKEN
I go on working for the same reason that a hen goes on laying eggs.
H. L. MENCKEN
If I ever marry it will be on a sudden impulse, as a man shoots himself.
H. L. MENCKEN
Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage they are giving evidence at a coroner's ...
H. L. MENCKEN
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed [and hence clamorous to be led t...
H. L. MENCKEN
We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense that we respect his theory that ...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is a sin to believe in the evil of others, but it is seldom a mistake.
H. L. MENCKEN
Under democracy, one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party...
H. L. MENCKEN
We must be willing to pay a price for freedom.
H. L. MENCKEN
No man could bring himself to reveal his true character, and, above all, his true limitations as a c...
H. L. MENCKEN
School-days, I believe, are the unhappiest in the whole span of human existence. They are full of du...
H. L. MENCKEN
Let's not burn the universities yet. After all, the damage they do might be worse.
H. L. MENCKEN
The aim of public education is not to spread enlightenment at all: it is simply to reduce as many in...
H. L. MENCKEN
The curse of man, and the cause of nearly all his woe, is his stupendous capacity for believing the ...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is a sin to believe evil of others, but it is seldom a mistake.
H. L. MENCKEN
Fame: an embalmer trembling with stage fright.
H. L. MENCKEN
So few men are really worth knowing, that it seems a shameful waste to let an anthropoid prejudice s...
H. L. MENCKEN
One may no more live in the world without picking up the moral prejudices of the world than one will...
H. L. MENCKEN
The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false face for the urge to rule it.
H. L. MENCKEN
Man is always looking for someone to boast to; woman is always looking for a shoulder to put her hea...
H. L. MENCKEN
A man's women folk, whatever their outward show of respect for his merit and authority, always regar...
H. L. MENCKEN
Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later, for another thing, th...
H. L. MENCKEN
Man weeps to think that he will die so soon; woman, that she was born so long ago.
H. L. MENCKEN
Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives.
H. L. MENCKEN
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
H. L. MENCKEN
It is impossible to believe that the same God who permitted His own son to die a bachelor regards ce...
H. L. MENCKEN
To the best of my knowledge and belief, the average American newspaper, even of the so-called better...
H. L. MENCKEN
The opera is to music what a bawdy house is to a cathedral.
H. L. MENCKEN
Time is the great equalizer in the field of morals.
H. L. MENCKEN
The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act...
H. L. MENCKEN
Morality is the theory that every human act must be either right or wrong, and that 99% of them are ...
H. L. MENCKEN
Moral certainty is always a sign of cultural inferiority. The more uncivilized the man, the surer he...
H. L. MENCKEN
The average man does not get pleasure out of an idea because he thinks it is true; he thinks it is t...
H. L. MENCKEN
Women have simple tastes. They get pleasure out of the conversation of children in arms and men in l...
H. L. MENCKEN
A metaphysician is one who, when you remark that twice two makes four, demands to know what you mean...
H. L. MENCKEN
Philosophy consists very largely of one philosopher arguing that all others are jackasses. He usuall...
H. L. MENCKEN
There is no record in history of a happy philosopher.
H. L. MENCKEN
An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it is a...
H. L. MENCKEN
Whenever you hear a man speak of his love for his country, it is a sign that he expects to be paid f...
H. L. MENCKEN
A society made up of individuals who were all capable of original thought would probably be unendura...
H. L. MENCKEN
Don't overestimate the decency of the human race.
H. L. MENCKEN
Man is never honestly the fatalist, nor even the stoic. He fights his fate, often desperately. He is...
H. L. MENCKEN
I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upo...
H. L. MENCKEN
There is nothing worse than an idle hour, with no occupation offering. People who have many such hou...
H. L. MENCKEN
Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that th...
H. L. MENCKEN
One horse-laugh is worth ten thousand syllogisms. It is not only more effective; it is also vastly m...
H. L. MENCKEN
A prohibitionist is the sort of man one couldn't care to drink with, even if he drank.
H. L. MENCKEN
On one issue at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women.
H. L. MENCKEN
The world always makes the assumption that the exposure of an error is identical with the discovery ...
H. L. MENCKEN
Communism, like any other revealed religion, is largely made up of prophecies.
H. L. MENCKEN
What men value in this world is not rights but privileges.
H. L. MENCKEN
The common argument that crime is caused by poverty is a kind of slander on the poor.
H. L. MENCKEN
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
H. L. MENCKEN
Conscience is the inner voice which warns us that someone may be looking.
H. L. MENCKEN
Life is a constant oscillation between the sharp horns of dilemmas.
H. L. MENCKEN
If I had my way, no man guilty of golf would be eligible to any office of trust under the United Sta...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is impossible to imagine the universe run by a wise, just and omnipotent God, but it is quite eas...
H. L. MENCKEN
Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their ...
H. L. MENCKEN
The cure for the evils of democracy is more democracy.
H. L. MENCKEN
Democracy is the theory that the common people know what They want, and deserve to get it good and h...
H. L. MENCKEN
Democracy is also a form of religion. It is the worship of jackals by jackasses.
H. L. MENCKEN
The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest...
H. L. MENCKEN
The truth that survives is simply the lie that is pleasantest to believe.
H. L. MENCKEN
Lying is not only excusable; it is not only innocent; it is, above all, necessary and unavoidable. W...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is impossible to think of a man of any actual force and originality, universally recognized as ha...
H. L. MENCKEN
Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
H. L. MENCKEN
A celebrity is one who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn't know.
H. L. MENCKEN
Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable.
H. L. MENCKEN
As the arteries grow hard, the heart grows soft.
H. L. MENCKEN
Have you ever watched a crab on the shore crawling backward in search of the Atlantic Ocean, and mis...
H. L. MENCKEN
Man is a beautiful machine that works very badly.
H. L. MENCKEN
The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. It is not s...
H. L. MENCKEN
Historian -- an unsuccessful novelist.
H. L. MENCKEN
Jealousy is the theory that some other fellow has just as little taste.
H. L. MENCKEN
The evidence of the emotions, save in cases where it has strong objective support, is really no evid...
H. L. MENCKEN
Government is actually the worst failure of civilized man. There has never been a really good one, a...
H. L. MENCKEN
The legislature, like the executive, has ceased to be even the creature of the people: it is the cre...
H. L. MENCKEN
The objection of the scandalmonger is not that she tells of racy doings, but that she pretends to be...
H. L. MENCKEN
God is the immemorial refuge of the incompetent, the helpless, the miserable. They find not only san...
H. L. MENCKEN
The movies today are too rich to have any room for genuine artists. They produce a few passable craf...
H. L. MENCKEN
Injustice is relatively easy to bear what stings is justice.
H. L. MENCKEN
The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the ...
H. L. MENCKEN
JUDGE, n: A law student who marks his own papers.
H. L. MENCKEN
Most people want security in this world, not liberty.
H. L. MENCKEN
The fact that I have no remedy for all the sorrows of the world is no reason for my accepting yours....
H. L. MENCKEN
Thanksgiving Day is a day devoted by persons with inflammatory rheumatism to thanking a loving Fathe...
H. L. MENCKEN
Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse.
H. L. MENCKEN
The lunatic fringe wags the underdog.
H. L. MENCKEN
Hygiene is the corruption of medicine by morality. It is impossible to find a hygienist who does not...
H. L. MENCKEN
Opera in English, is about as sensible as baseball in Italian.
H. L. MENCKEN
The Belief that man is outfitted with an immortal soul, differing altogether from the engines which ...
H. L. MENCKEN
Alimony -- the ransom that the happy pay to the devil.
H. L. MENCKEN
A gentlemen is one who never strikes a woman without provocation.
H. L. MENCKEN
No one hates his job so heartily as a farmer.
H. L. MENCKEN
The public, with its mob yearning to be instructed, edified and pulled by the nose, demands certaint...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is the dull man who is always sure, and the sure man who is always dull.
H. L. MENCKEN
When women kiss it always reminds one of prize-fighters shaking hands.
H. L. MENCKEN
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
H. L. MENCKEN
The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
H. L. MENCKEN
The only cure for contempt is counter-contempt.
H. L. MENCKEN
Imagine the Creator as a stand up comedian - and at once the world becomes explicable.
H. L. MENCKEN
It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though sh...
H. L. MENCKEN
After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations.
H. L. MENCKEN
Unionism, seldom if ever, uses such powers as it has to ensure better work; almost always it devotes...
H. L. MENCKEN
I never agree with Communists or any other kind of kept men.
H. L. MENCKEN
The idea that leisure is of value in itself is only conditionally true. The average man simply spend...
H. L. MENCKEN
Remorse is regret that one waited so long to do it.
H. L. MENCKEN
Self-respect: the secure feeling that no one, as yet, is suspicious.
H. L. MENCKEN
Life is a dead-end street.
H. L. MENCKEN
It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though sh...
H. L. MENCKEN
It doesn't take a majority to make a rebellion; it takes only a few determined leaders and a sound c...
H. L. MENCKEN
The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act...
H. L. MENCKEN
No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
H. L. MENCKEN
The truth is that the average schoolmaster, on all the lower levels, is and always must be essential...
H. L. MENCKEN
The more a man dreams, the less he believes.
H. L. MENCKEN
On one issue at least, men and women agree: they both distrust women.
H. L. MENCKEN
Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays twice as much in taxes as he former...
H. L. MENCKEN
The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the...
H. L. MENCKEN
Before a man speaks, it is always safe to assume that he is a fool. After he speaks it is seldom nec...
H. L. MENCKEN
How little it takes to make life unbearable: a pebble in the shoe, a cockroach in the spaghetti, a w...
H. L. MENCKEN
The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated.
H. L. MENCKEN
Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.
H. L. MENCKEN
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundre...
H. L. MENCKEN
Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking.
H. L. MENCKEN
The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other a...
H. L. MENCKEN
Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.
H. L. MENCKEN
To die for an idea; it is unquestionably noble. But how much nobler it would be if men died for idea...
H. L. MENCKEN
The government consists of a gang of men exactly like you and me. They have, taking one with another...
H. L. MENCKEN
I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time.
H. L. MENCKEN
It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.
H. L. MENCKEN
Alimony - the ransom that the happy pay to the devil.
H. L. MENCKEN
On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at la...
H. L. MENCKEN
Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.
H. L. MENCKEN
In war the heroes always outnumber the soldiers ten to one.
H. L. MENCKEN
The most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief ...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common hones...
H. L. MENCKEN
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?
H. L. MENCKEN
In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice t...
H. L. MENCKEN
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led t...
H. L. MENCKEN
It doesn't take a majority to make a rebellion; it takes only a few determined leaders and a sou...
H. L. MENCKEN
Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage.
H. L. MENCKEN
An idealist is one who, on noticing that roses smell better than a cabbage, concludes that it will a...
H. L. MENCKEN
Every man sees in his relatives, and especially in his cousins, a series of grotesque caricatures of...
H. L. MENCKEN
Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what...
H. L. MENCKEN
Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven...
H. L. MENCKEN
Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
H. L. MENCKEN
No one in this world, so far as I know - and I have searched the records for years, and employed age...
H. L. MENCKEN
The one permanent emotion of the inferior man is fear - fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexpl...
H. L. MENCKEN
No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice...
H. L. MENCKEN
I never lecture, not because I am shy or a bad speaker, but simply because I detest the sort of peop...
H. L. MENCKEN
The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regar...
H. L. MENCKEN
Puritanism. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
H. L. MENCKEN
I never smoked a cigarette until I was nine.
H. L. MENCKEN
If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries fo...
H. L. MENCKEN
It is not materialism that is the chief curse of the world, as pastors teach, but idealism. Men get ...
H. L. MENCKEN
Poetry has done enough when it charms, but prose must also convince.
H. L. MENCKEN
Before a man speaks it is always safe to assume that he is a fool. After he speaks, it is seldom nec...
H. L. MENCKEN
For it is mutual trust, even more than mutual interest that holds human associations together. Our f...
H. L. MENCKEN
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.
H. L. MENCKEN
Every election is a sort of advance auction sale of stolen goods.
H. L. MENCKEN
Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he fo...
H. L. MENCKEN
Legend: A lie that has attained the dignity of age.
H. L. MENCKEN
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.
H. L. MENCKEN
It is hard for the ape to believe he descended from man.
H. L. MENCKEN
Archbishop - A Christian ecclesiastic of a rank superior to that attained by Christ.
H. L. MENCKEN
Adultery is the application of democracy to love.
H. L. MENCKEN
Each party steals so many articles of faith from the other, and the candidates spend so much time ma...
H. L. MENCKEN
Have you ever watched a crab on the shore crawling backward in search of the Atlantic Ocean, and mis...
H. L. MENCKEN
A national political campaign is better than the best circus ever heard of, with a mass baptism and ...
H. L. MENCKEN
There is a saying in Baltimore that crabs may be prepared in fifty ways and that all of them are goo...
H. L. MENCKEN