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Bet your parents were proud of you, ... Even now, he has a bumper sticker on his truck showing off about collecting beer cans. Imagine. I have the beer can husband.


Helen Allen

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Bet your parents were proud of you, ... Even now, he has a bumper sticker on his truck showing off a...
HELEN ALLEN If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose
JACK HANDY Gentlemen, consider: of course the ancient Egyptians made beer cans; where else would they have kept...
NEIL GAIMAN “Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-...
GEORGE CARLIN I never had one beer. If I bought a six-pack of beer, I kept drinking till all six beers were gone. ...
SAMUEL L. JACKSON I really loathe [the bumper sticker] 'Proud Parent of a Terrific Kid!'

Why not a bumper s...
CELIA RIVENBARK One final thought. In the years leading up to my trial, whenever I was caught in bumper-to-bumper tr...
MORDECAI RICHLER If you’re such a shallow person that a goddamn bumper sticker can sum up your beliefs, then Jesus ...
JASON MYERS I started with my buddies when I was in high school, ... We all had shelves of old beer cans.
HELEN ALLEN It's easier today to place a bet on a college campus than it is to buy a pack of cigarettes or a can...
ARNIE WEXLER How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
ANONYMOUS The tavern owners and, by extension, the beer truck companies (we do sell some trucks to people who ...
ALAN ADLER You can't just survive off beer.
DEBRA RIVEST Accusations fit on a bumper sticker; the truth takes longer.
MICHAEL HAYDEN Sitting on my stool I thought of a bumper sticker: "If Mean People Suck, Why Isn't My Dick In Your M...
PAUL NEILAN prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into
DON MARQUIS Prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into.
DON MARQUIS They're not about helping people, they're about punishing people. You can't control this, especially...
ARNIE WEXLER At that point we weren't thinking about pouring beer in a concession environment. We were thinking a...
MATTHEW YOUNKLE He felt around desperately for a weapon. What did he have? Diapers? Cookies? Oh, why hadn't they giv...
SUZANNE COLLINS Let's have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it.
ANONYMOUS The clothing is about sun protection and of course we have beer can island shorts.
BETSY GARRISON Genius has its limitations.
Insanity...not so much" -Bumper Sticker
DARYNDA JONES President Obama's version of America is a divided one - pitting us against each other based on o...
MIA LOVE It starts to send a different signal about the demographics of beer. It starts to paint a slightly d...
BOB LACHKY Beer. It always seems like such a good idea at the time, doesn't it? What's worse is beer se...
STEVEN HALL The old man sold beer after hours on weekends. And that was something that he probably did to top up...
LINDSAY FOX All I can really tell you about my father is that he did odd things like put tin foil on a bottle of...
BRUCE ERIC KAPLAN God is love, but Satan does that thing you like with his tongue.

--BUMPER STICKER
DARYNDA JONES I'll bet even Helen of Troy had to have at least a little sunshine in her disposition.
LORETTA YOUNG We found no evidence ? open liquor bottles or beer cans ? of alcohol or drug use. Their use is not r...
ANGELO BITSIS I don't know what goes on in the crowd. I've had them show up and throw beer cans at me. I c...
LOU REED I have a beer belly.
CHRISTY TURLINGTON Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
DAN CASTELLANETA You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kin...
FRANK ZAPPA You can do anything with beer that you can do with wine. Beer is great for basting or marinating mea...
GRANT WOOD You can do anything with beer that you can do with wine, ... Beer is great for basting or marinating...
GRANT WOOD Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.
HENRY LAWSON Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer
HENRY LAWSON There was so much brush in the area, and you'd have not-respectable people hanging out all the time,...
STANDING BEAR Laugh in the face of those who try to oppress you. And crack a beer (root beer).
THEE AMAZING GRACE I do now remember the poor creature, small beer.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE You don't play beer ads in the morning and you don't play beer ads on the news, so they're going aga...
HARRY SCHUHMACHER I want a beer. I want a giant, ice-cold bottle of beer and shower sex.
NORA ROBERTS Let me finish my beer." (Stark)
"Of course. The end of the world can wait.(Kasabian)
RICHARD KADREY We would leave the station around 4 each afternoon, and Mike would always have a feast prepared in t...
BOB JONES I usually need a can of beer to prime me.
NORMAN MAILER Now people come in and they're very excited about talking about beer and brewing.
COLIN KAMINSKI If I have a near-beer, I’m near beer. And if I’m near beer, I’m close to tequila. And if I’m...
CRAIG FERGUSON Beer: All real men drink a specific brand of cheap beer. While I was growing up, my stepfather, who ...
FORREST GRIFFIN I don't want to play stinking, beer-ridden clubs. It depresses me even thinking about that. I re...
STEVE JONES First, you drink the beer, obviously, and you think about everything you’ve been through, includin...
RACHEL SHARP EVERYBODY NEED BEER, EVEN DAVE ROTH.
DAVID LEE ROTH I'm in the mood for a beer right now,
ANDY RODDICK There was a lack of buzz about beer in general for a while, but now it's turned around.
COLIN KAMINSKI I just want to tailgate, drink beer, and hang out in the middle of nowhere in a pick-up truck. That&...
RONDA ROUSEY Now you can have a small taste of beer or wine and a bit of food to go with it without the emotional...
CLARK WOLF Well, basically there are two sorts of opera," said Nanny, who also had the true witch's ability to ...
TERRY PRATCHETT Do you even know what hammerd means?" I asked.

"Something to do with drinking your Americ...
JENNIFER RARDIN Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
DAN CASTELLANETA So do you come here often?” he asked in a slightly self-mocking way. I couldn't help myself—I sm...
ALLY CARTER You can never buy beer, you just rent it.
ARCHIE BUNKER If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is NOT for you. (BUMPER STICKER)
DARYNDA JONES I have respect for beer.
RUSSELL CROWE All you need, you think, is a breather, a few minutes standing up at the bar like in the old days, h...
JONATHAN CRAIG There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.
CHARLES M. SCHULZ There's a certain idea of pickup trucks and cans of beer that kind of go together, and I think that'...
RICHARD ALPERT I don't much believe in bumper sticker characterizations of foreign policy.
JOHN BOLTON Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer.
BILLY CARTER Only a writer would slap a bumper sticker on her car that read, 'Seriously, I'd rather be working...
RICHELLE E. GOODRICH It's nice to be able to drink your own beer and be proud of it. It's especially nice to know others ...
ERIC BUEHNER I enjoy my beer. It's a fun hobby, and you get to drink your handiwork.
JAY BERMAN Look, you know and I know that it's either Abraham or Einstein, but dammit, a free beer is a free be...
THE ARCHIVES If god is watching us,
the least we can do is be entertaining.

--BUMPER STIC...
DARYNDA JONES I would bet that he has all the (generator) power he needs. And I imagine he has some form of commun...
BILL CLARK Now he has to use his litter box. You can imagine, he's frantic to get out.
CARRIE KNOX You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind o...
FRANK ZAPPA My brother, Abraham Jr., went back to the grave after Rita hit. The grave was not damaged, and (he) ...
TIM VINCENT If I'm a voter, I throw a bumper sticker in the trash. That car, I'm doing to put on my desk.
TOMMY WEST Is that how tall you are without those ridiculous shoes?' he said derisively. I think I was born big...
JOSEPHINE ANGELINI You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline -- it helps if you have some kind ...
FRANK ZAPPA You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind o...
FRANK ZAPPA You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of...
FRANCIS VINCENT “FRANK” ZAPPA, JR. Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer.
BILLY CARTER It amounts to about a penny a beer.
LEE ERICKSON Your party kicked so much ass!Even though you suck so much! It's like, instead of blood, your heart ...
JOHN GREEN It's such a different environment, I can't even tell you. Ten years ago, knocking on somebody's door...
JEFF BURTON Oldest Beer on the River,
DANIEL BOONE I laugh, and my lipstick leaves a red stain like a bloody crescent moon on the top of the beer can.
SYLVIA PLATH In the wrestling world, you had WWE, WCW, and smaller promotions that were like the independents. I ...
STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN I look like the kind of guy who has a bottle of beer in my hand.
CHARLES BRONSON A man who lies about beer makes enemies
STEPHEN KING There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.
CHARLES M. SCHULZ They who drink beer will think beer.
WASHINGTON IRVING The beer has a fantastic flavor. It tastes like fall and brings to mind leaves crunching under your ...
RON JEFFRIES Hard work has a future. Laziness pays off now.
BUMPER STICKER If I could remember your name, I'd ask you where I left my keys.
BUMPER STICKER Anyone who says money can't buy happiness just doesn't know where to shop.
BUMPER STICKER There's nothing wrong with teenagers that reasoning with them won't aggravate.
BUMPER STICKER He was a wise man who invented beer.
UNKNOWN

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HELEN KELLER I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.
HELEN KELLER Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.
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HELEN KELLER Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature.... Life is either a daring adventure...
HELEN KELLER The sudden ending of a White House career all seems so unceremonious for aides who have personally s...
HELEN THOMAS The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of ...
HELEN KELLER There exists no culture in which adultery is unknown, no cultural device or code that extinguishes p...
HELEN FISHER I still suffer terribly from stage fright. I get sick with fear. Not every night, but at the beginni...
HELEN MIRREN It is wonderful how much time good people spend fighting the devil. If they would only expend the sa...
HELEN KELLER Two phrases I hate in reference to female characters are 'strong' and 'feisty.' They...
HELEN MIRREN The first book I really loved was 'Little Women' - I'd have given anything for Beth to h...
HELEN OYEYEMI I am not too keen on my nose, I don't like my knees, I hate my ankles, I am unsure about my behi...
HELEN MIRREN When you do a voice in an animated film, you don't see the finished product at all. You're n...
HELEN MIRREN People who refuse to rest honorably on their laurels when they reach retirement age seem very admira...
HELEN HAYES