A committee is a group of the unwilling, chosen from the unfit, to do the unnecessary.
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A committee is a group of the unwilling chosen form the unfit, to do the unnecessary.
SOURCE UNKNOWN Committee: A group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit to do the unnecessary.
RICHARD HARKNESS A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
FRED ALLEN When it comes to facing up to serious problems, each candidate will pledge to appoint a committee. A...
RICHARD LONG HARKNESS The scientific method gives us
information by testing and repeating observable things so that we
can...
LEWIS N. ROE I'm fucking the grave, I thought, I'm bringing the dead back to life...
CHARLES BUKOWSKI You must save what you can of your life; you musn't lose it all simply because you've lost a part.
HENRY JAMES His life seemed like a deck of cards, and in the midst of all those two’s and three’s someone ha...
TEKOA MANNING not-so-subtle reminder that there was creativity before silicon chips. Creativity doesn't live in ma...
THE COMMITTEE should grow in proportion to increases in corporate profitability.
THE COMMITTEE interior ministry services of resorting to torture and ransoming prisoners.
THE COMMITTEE the President and directing the Secretary of State to transmit to the House of Representatives not l...
THE COMMITTEE Something happened that changed the priority assigned to the job search. On the morning of December ...
THE COMMITTEE Bribery.
THE COMMITTEE take leadership in sending out positive messages about asylum-seekers.
THE COMMITTEE [The commission operates on the belief that some closures are inevitable.] The marketplace is drivin...
THE COMMITTEE NDU, the premier center for joint professional military education, is under the direction of the Cha...
THE COMMITTEE We are products of the NDDC Act and we intend to work for peace and development in the Niger Delta. ...
THE COMMITTEE automatic scholarships to Niger Delta indigenes so as to give them higher levels of competence to en...
THE COMMITTEE president's allies will send our complaint to the graveyard at the latest on Wednesday unless we are...
THE COMMITTEE Empathy is the new measurement of everything. It doesn't matter what religion you have, what God you...
C. JOYBELL C. She wasn't bitter. She was sad, though. But it was a hopeful kind of sad. The kind of sad that just ...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY So, I guess we are who we are for alot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. But even...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I love my mom so much. I don't care if that's corny to say. I think on my next birthday, I'm going t...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY We Are All Infinite
STEPHEN CHBOSKY (All the grief she had suffered over her lifetime had moulded her face into a mask of eternal sadnes...
JEAN SASSON You can't just sit there and put everyone's lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You ...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I saw other people there. Old men sitting alone. Young girls with blue eye shadow and awkward jaws. ...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY That one moment when you know you are not a sad story. You are ALIVE.
STEPHAN CHBOSKY Somos quienes somos por un montón de razones.Quizás nunca conozcamos la mayoría de ellas.Pero aun...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Ambos dijeron que tomara asiento y parecían hablar en serio, así que me senté.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I know these will all be stories some day, and our pictures will become old photographs. We all beco...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY So I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybewe'll never know most of them.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY So I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY There's nothing like the deep breathes after laughing that hard. Nothing in the world like a sore st...
STHEPHEN CHBOSKY no more pencils, no more books, no more teachers' dirty looks, when the teacher rings the bell, drop...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I don't know the significance of this, but I find it very interesting.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Maybe it’s sad that these are now memories. And maybe it’s not sad.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Mother Superior jump the gun...
-The Beatles, Happiness is a Warm Gun
LAUREN MYRACLE When looking for evidence that something exists, it's silly
to start by assuming that it is impossib...
LEWIS N. ROE Using the scientific knowledge that we
currently possess, we can take simple logical steps, backed b...
LEWIS N. ROE I am often asked how it is that I am able to value people to such a deep degree. Apparently, I exhib...
C. JOYBELL C. We begin to fight. The wind and I. Horns locked. Battling each other with elements.
LAURA DOCKRILL Wake up to a brand new day and realize why you woke up to meet the day! Live to the end of another d...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH I was very grateful to have heard it again. Because I guess we all forget sometimes. And I think eve...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. But even if...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Well, you can't know it without something having been sneezed.
A.A. MILNE We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?' asked Piglet.
Even longer,' Pooh answered.”
...
A.A. MILNE your best men are
drunks and your worst men are
locking them
up,
your best men a...
CHARLES BUKOWSKI Some people never take a chance and never know what it's like to live life to the full.
CHLOE THURLOW Abril é o mês mais cruel, gera lilases da terra morta, mistura a memória e o desejo, mistura raí...
JULIA GREGSON Gracias a la vida que me ha dado tanto
JULIA GREGSON Love is a growing, or full constant light,
And his first minute, after noon, is night.
JOHN DONNE Life is not a game. Still, in this life, we choose the games we live to play.
J.R. RIM A great future starts with what you can see
SOTONYE ANGA I was suddenly very aware of the fact it was me standing up in that tunnel with the wind over my fac...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY The only perspective is to really be there.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I didn't feel like reading that night, so I went downstairs and watched a half-hour long commercial ...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Why is England manufacturing bigger and better airplanes and bombs and at the same time churning out...
ANNE FRANK To call the population of strangers in the midst of which we live "society" is such a usurpation tha...
THE INVISIBLE COMMITTEE We have been expropriated from our own language by television, from our songs by reality TV contests...
THE INVISIBLE COMMITTEE The situation is like this: they hired our parents to destroy this world, and now they'd like to put...
THE INVISIBLE COMMITTEE Your mind is a Microcosm of strength and power. There’s all the magic you need in it. When all els...
CHINONYE J. CHIDOLUE Life can be tough & make you wanna give up. But baby keep your head up because you got all the time ...
LILLIAN S. VILORIA The role of the
Christian is to let other people know what Jesus has done, not to
think of themselve...
LEWIS N. ROE Naturalistic atheism debunks itself. It
has no power to explain even some
of the most basic principl...
LEWIS N. ROE It's important to understand that if
someone calls themselves a Christian, it does not automatically...
LEWIS N. ROE You're full of contradictions, Ms. Wallace."
I looked up at him and arched a brow. "I'm a girl...
TAMMARA WEBBER As far back as history records people thinking, thinking people
have been befuddled by the mysteries...
LEWIS N. ROE The only way he could have her was to shatter this stubborn faith of hers. In doing so, would he sha...
FRANCINE RIVERS I just want you to know that you’re very special… and the only reason I’m telling you is that ...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY I thought I would write a love letter. But then, I wrote a book." - Suzy Davies, on "Johari's Window
SUZY DAVIES The Dream of a Queer Fellow I write the words again and they appear doubly pregnant with meaning. It...
JOHN MIDDLETON MURRY If you have read this far in the chronicle of the Baudelaire orphans - and I certainly hope you have...
LEMONY SNICKET The unfortunate thing is that, sometimes, we slip, but, fortunately, consciously or unconsciously, w...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH until we do what has not yet been done, what has not been done shall remain undone
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH He wept because he was afraid now that he could not save Gabriel. He no longer cared about himself
LOIS LOWRY I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES If I provide for this life and turn away from the Lord, I am wise for a moment, but lost forever.
FRANCINE RIVERS The only way he could have her was to shatter this stubborn faith of hers. In doing so, would he sha...
FRANCINE RIVERS Everyone always says how I'm so smart, but they don't know what it's like being me. always feeling l...
SUSANE COLASANTI You deserve to be with somebody, who knows you're the one, from that very first moment he lays eyes ...
C. JOYBELL C. This is your fault. I'm going to kill you. And all the cake is gone.
You don't even care, do yo...
J.K. SIMMONS He had what he called just a small ration of tools:
A painted book.
A handful of pencils.<...
MARKUS ZUSAK Oh happy day! A day to make a hay! And when it is mid-day, think about the day! And when you think a...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Put my head under my pillow, and let the quiet put things where they are supposed to be.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Farming is the oldest profession on earth
SOTONYE ANGA He said it was the kind of book you made your own.
STEPHEN CHBOSKY No hay nada como respirar hondo después de reírte tanto. Nada en el mundo como el dolor de estóma...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY Sam dropped me off. When she was too far away to see me, I started to cry again. Because she was my ...
STEPHEN CHBOSKY The best thing you can do for your kids is to show them God working in you on a daily basis.
CRAIG GROESCHEL The atheist might have
no proof for the
supernatural, but they
also have no proof
against it. If we ...
LEWIS N. ROE In a world in which the common rule which binds and regulates what the general masses feel is underm...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH And they say
She's in the class A Team
Stuck in her daydream
Been that way since eigh...
ED SHEERAN Unsubscribe from should-a, would-a, could-a
MICHAEL H. DANSBURY Never give up on you. In order to make a difference you would have to somehow be different.
JOHNNIE DENT JR. Well, I'm your man. I'm the bloody bastard you wanted when you had me spawned. I'm your tool, and wh...
ORSON SCOTT CARD the room of the spirit is the mind and the seat of the spirit is the heart. What we give room to muc...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH How should I know?" said Alice, surprised at her own courage. "It's no business of mine."
The Q...
LEWIS CARROLL I wish I was home", She said miserably.
She tried so hard to be brave,
to be fierce as a...
GEORGE R.R. MARTIN
More Anonymous
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ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS You don't have to touch someone to love them, It's not in the kiss, It's in the times you don't kiss...
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ANONYMOUS Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
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ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what y...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
ANONYMOUS It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
ANONYMOUS He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
ANONYMOUS All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
ANONYMOUS A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do yo...
ANONYMOUS A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
ANONYMOUS Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
ANONYMOUS Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...b...
ANONYMOUS Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her o...
ANONYMOUS Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family d...
ANONYMOUS The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
ANONYMOUS Leadership is the ability to hide your panic from others.
ANONYMOUS An expert knows all the answers -- if you ask the right questions.
ANONYMOUS Time cuts down all, Both great and small.
ANONYMOUS Few cases of eyestrain have been developed by looking on the bright side of things.
ANONYMOUS Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Canaveral.
ANONYMOUS Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. •Anonymous Many an o...
ANONYMOUS Some of the smallest situations are the biggest to some people.
ANONYMOUS Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment; woman accepts it as a natural heritage.
ANONYMOUS Defeat may test you; it need not stop you. If at first you don't succeed, try another way. For eve...
ANONYMOUS Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
ANONYMOUS A friend is one to whom you can pour out the contents of your heart, chaff and grain alike. Knowin...
ANONYMOUS Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and u...
ANONYMOUS She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
ANONYMOUS many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting; but a ...
ANONYMOUS Lady Wisdom will be your close friend; and Brother Knowledge will be your pleasant companion.
ANONYMOUS When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
ANONYMOUS It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is possible only when one is busy. The body must toil, the mind must be occupied, and the ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like jam. You can't spread even a little without getting some on yourself.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the overcoming of not unknown obstacles toward a known goal.
ANONYMOUS Happiness seems to be the result of something happening — inactivity is not very exhilarating.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not pleasure, it's victory.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passe...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not given but exchanged.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes f...
ANONYMOUS If happiness could be brought, few of us could pay the price.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you turn your a...
ANONYMOUS So live that your memories will be part of your happiness.
ANONYMOUS Happiness consists in activity; such as the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not always measured in smiles.
ANONYMOUS Happiness lies in our own backyard, but it's probably well hidden by crabgrass.
ANONYMOUS Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
ANONYMOUS The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
ANONYMOUS Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle ...
ANONYMOUS Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
ANONYMOUS To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
ANONYMOUS My friend, why have you drifted so far away? All motion is relative, maybe it is you who have moved ...
ANONYMOUS The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pa...
ANONYMOUS Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
ANONYMOUS Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick.
ANONYMOUS When you laugh, be sure to laugh at what people do and not at what people are.
ANONYMOUS The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a cannon - but it's echo lasts a great deal longer.
ANONYMOUS Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding i...
ANONYMOUS A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
ANONYMOUS When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.
ANONYMOUS Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, ...
ANONYMOUS تبسمك في وجه أخيك صدقة، وأمرك بالمعروف صدقة ونهيك عن ال...
ANONYMOUS The first men to be created and formed were called the Sorcerer of Fatal Laughter, the Sorcerer of N...
ANONYMOUS Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...
ANONYMOUS And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
ANONYMOUS Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for ...
ANONYMOUS Anyone who is having troubles should pray. Anyone who is happy should sing praises. Anyone who is si...
ANONYMOUS I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.
ANONYMOUS Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
ANONYMOUS Store front sign: Entire store on sale, everything $1 or more.
ANONYMOUS If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.
ANONYMOUS Why didn't Bruce Willis play the lead role in Titanic? He would have saved everyone.
ANONYMOUS I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out?
ANONYMOUS My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!
ANONYMOUS If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters.
ANONYMOUS Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
ANONYMOUS It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too,...
ANONYMOUS One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less t...
ANONYMOUS The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
ANONYMOUS In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.
ANONYMOUS How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
ANONYMOUS The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
ANONYMOUS Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of...
ANONYMOUS Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I ...
ANONYMOUS Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits.
ANONYMOUS Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.
ANONYMOUS My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.
ANONYMOUS Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
ANONYMOUS As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
ANONYMOUS When the cop told me to give him my first name and last name I told him, 'Are you crazy? What's my ...
ANONYMOUS Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn.
ANONYMOUS What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
ANONYMOUS Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
ANONYMOUS Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
ANONYMOUS I bet you anything that I can stop gambling right now.
ANONYMOUS My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too ...
ANONYMOUS Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
ANONYMOUS I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:
Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.<...
ANONYMOUS Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time a...
ANONYMOUS He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this ...
ANONYMOUS I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition.
ANONYMOUS I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
ANONYMOUS Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!
ANONYMOUS I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
ANONYMOUS My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museu...
ANONYMOUS Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
ANONYMOUS I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
ANONYMOUS There was a robot invented in China that catches thieves. In Australia it caught 10 thieves, in Ame...
ANONYMOUS I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
ANONYMOUS How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone.
ANONYMOUS Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
ANONYMOUS After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23.
ANONYMOUS Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
ANONYMOUS I always mean what I say, I don't always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.
ANONYMOUS I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
ANONYMOUS Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
ANONYMOUS Never judge a book by it's movie
ANONYMOUS I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my ...
ANONYMOUS When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.
ANONYMOUS Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
ANONYMOUS If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your sm...
ANONYMOUS My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
ANONYMOUS I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
ANONYMOUS Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast...
ANONYMOUS I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close ...
ANONYMOUS Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted ...
ANONYMOUS Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.
ANONYMOUS Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
ANONYMOUS I'm not really a control freak, but... can I show the right way to do that?
ANONYMOUS A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
ANONYMOUS I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is.
ANONYMOUS Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
ANONYMOUS Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red!
ANONYMOUS Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing.
ANONYMOUS Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
ANONYMOUS I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
ANONYMOUS The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people al...
ANONYMOUS I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.
ANONYMOUS The amount of time it takes for a minute to go by is proportionally dependent with the distance to t...
ANONYMOUS Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to sco...
ANONYMOUS I can't wait for that to never happen.
ANONYMOUS I liked the movie Titanic, my favorite character was the iceberg.
ANONYMOUS Sports top moment: to score a goal but miss in the re-play.
ANONYMOUS Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
ANONYMOUS Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible.
ANONYMOUS An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
ANONYMOUS My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me."
ANONYMOUS Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face.
ANONYMOUS You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar.
ANONYMOUS Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.
ANONYMOUS It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase al...
ANONYMOUS If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patte...
ANONYMOUS Whenever you feel stupid, remember that there are people outside searching for Pokemon.
ANONYMOUS