Seriously? You won’t help me?”
“Help yourself get killed? No, I won’t.
Dave Barry
Related
The cigarettes you light one after another won’t help you forget her.
FRANK SINATRA No questions, boy, then you won’t get no lies.
VIKRANT PARSAI God’s Word is written for you and to you, but it won’t help unless you read it.
ELIZABETH GEORGE Love yourself; you won’t regret it ever.
M.F. MOONZAJER I won’t let you have it. I won’t give you this moment. I won’t let you fill up this valuable o...
COCO J. GINGER Is it okay to kiss you?” he asks.
“What?”
“I won’t get struck by lightning?
CYNTHIA HAND Just a shower. If you want me to stay on the opposite side, I will. I won’t kiss. I won’t touch....
KATIE MCGARRY What’s happening is a very stern lecture. You do not walk to your car at night, alone, ever again....
GENA SHOWALTER Wealth won’t make you happy. Power won’t make you remarkable. Fame won’t make you honorable. E...
MATSHONA DHLIWAYO No, it’s not fair, but what makes earth feel like Hell is our expectation that it should feel like...
CHUCK PALAHNIUK Let this time in your life cut you open and drain all of the things that are holding you back. I’m...
JENNIFER ELISABETH When you are stressed and challenged by hardships just smile through it as frowning won’t help in ...
ABHYSHEQ SHUKLA Surround yourself with positive people and you won’t fail ever.
LILY CHATTERJEE I won’t stay,” I warned him. “I won’t try to fight for you anymore. This is it. If you walk ...
SAMANTHA YOUNG Don’t settle for a relationship that won’t let you be yourself.
OPRAH WINFREY Don’t make yourself poor to one who won’t make you rich.
VIKRANT PARSAI NO, I CAN’T AND I WON’T
PEYTON MANNING WHEN ASKED TO COMMENT ON HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH JIM IRSAY By the time I’ve finished with you,
you won’t know whether you’ve been kissed or cut,...
WARSAN SHIRE you won’t ever get ahead if you keep feeling sorry for yourself. You must stop all the negative ta...
MICHELE WOOLLEY Turn on the faucet. Wash yourself with the emotion. It won’t hurt you. It will only help. If you l...
MITCH ALBOM I sent a quick text to Adrian: I have a hickey! You can’t ever kiss me again. I honestly ha...
RICHELLE MEAD Mindfulness won’t ensure you’ll win an argument with your sister. Mindfulness won’t enable you...
SHARON SALZBERG Worrying won’t get you anywhere, trusting God and letting Him lead you on will help you achieve ev...
LATIKA TEOTIA Unless you disregard shame, you won’t get a lasting reward.
SUNDAY ADELAJA What happens when I love,
you ask, does the world start
making sense?
No, my dear,...
KAMAND KOJOURI I’ll affect you slowly
as if you were having a picnic in a dream.
There will be no ants...
RICHARD BRAUTIGAN Go to church and get directions so you won’t get lost.
ELIZABETH B. KNAUS Mencheres dropped his hands from my shoulders. “You know that’s what he wants. He’ll want to t...
JEANIENE FROST In the end you’ll see you won’t stop me.
CHRISTINA AGUILERA Sometimes knowing what you won’t do will get you there faster.
LORI R TAYLOR There is nothing I can do that won’t bring me back to you.
KAMAND KOJOURI Do you take anything seriously?”
“Not if I can help it. Makes life so tedious.
LEIGH BARDUGO Dave Barry Turns 50
DAVE BARRY You have to promise that you won’t fall in love with me.
NICHOLAS SPARKS I won’t kiss you. It might get to be a habit and I can’t get rid of habits.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD When you look for someone who can change your life, find someone who won’t just change your relati...
KAORU SHINMON You’re only responsible for yourself, Jess. And that’s the only person you can control. Other pe...
SUSAN MALLERY If you don’t cultivate your promise land you won’t get anything from it.
SUNDAY ADELAJA Just give me one night, Vanessa. One night, and I won’t let you regret it.
MEREDITH WILD I used to dash by, feeling like a dartboard, a big red bull's-eye that Mother pinged darts at.
THE HELP I sat in the study parlor and wrote for hours-mostly term papers but also short stories, bad poetry,...
THE HELP Dave Bowman: Hello, HAL. Do you read me, HAL?
HAL: Affirmative, Dave. I read you.
Dave B...
ARTHUR C. CLARKE I have tried to get help for so long and no one will believe me. I have killed for the past ten year...
HENRY LEE LUCAS You terrify me. But not enough to make me think you won’t be worth it.
LEISA RAYVEN John’s voice cracked when he answered, and she could hear the pain seeping in no matter how hard h...
LORI RYAN C’mon,” he said. “One foot in front of the other. You know how it’s done”
“You’re...
LEIGH BARDUGO Arise O lion-heart! Awake, O great soldier! Misery has come upon the world. It is wailing for help. ...
ABHIJIT NASKAR What are you doing?” I asked. “Are we getting all Fifty Shades up in here?”
He shushed m...
SOPHIA BLEU Unless everything can get worse, it won’t get any better.
CHUCK PALAHNIUK The only real conflict you will ever have in your life won’t be with others, but with yourself.
SHANNON L. ALDER And Amber?”
Cade looked stricken at the mention. “I knew her before she had breasts, so she...
MAISEY YATES Until you believe that you are all you need to be amazing, you probably won’t find yourself accomp...
DAN WALDSCHMIDT The point is, if we find out you’ve been horrible to Harry —”
“— and make no mistake,...
J.K. ROWLING Just as you won’t enjoy the fruits of the tree you dislike, so you won’t even wait to learn from...
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR You won’t know any other love than the one you have already had, you won’t know any other pain t...
ROSE B MASHIGO But when someone does wrong, when we make mistakes, we don’t say we’re sorry. We promise to make...
LEIGH BARDUGO So help me God,” I said slowly, clearly, when Cate looked up at me. “If you go back on your word...
ALEXANDRA BRACKEN Love people who hate you and their hatred won’t get grounds to gain roots.
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR Never explain yourself. Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it
ZIAD K ABDELNOUR Our daily prayer ought to be:
Please universe, help me
help myself
and help me sho...
KAMAND KOJOURI You need to tell me why it won’t work.”
“Because you’re seventeen and I’m eighteen. B...
KRIS NOEL Whatever. I just won’t have Elena hurt, is all. Or the little red-headed witch.”
“...
L.J. SMITH I promise that this will be the last time you’ll see me. I won’t come back. I won’t put you th...
STEPHENIE MEYER The ocean-blue bowl won’t
refuse to bruise, won’t hold it back
from the gaping earth...
BRYANA JOY Did you know that if you put a frog in boiling water, he’ll jump out? But, if you put one in cold ...
EMMA CHASE So does that mean if you won’t fuck me because I’m high, I could fuck you because you’re not?
K.A. MITCHELL For anyone who has ever had a moment of weakness.
It won’t be painful forever, so don’t let...
J.A. REDMERSKI Will the others see you too?" asked Lucy.
"Certainly not at first," said Aslan. "Later on, it d...
C.S. LEWIS (Ren's) eyes were sad but resigned. “And where will you go?”
I couldn’t keep the fear out...
ANDREA CREMER His eyebrows pulled in. “You won’t leave me, right? Even when I’m a pain in the ass?”
�...
JAMIE MCGUIRE If you have strength, why won’t you work?
LAILAH GIFTY AKITA Please—please get up—and lower your voice—”
“Hell no.”
“Why no...
TAHEREH MAFI You can learn from those who have come down from the mountain, but you won’t have the same experie...
RICHIE NORTON We Destroy Because We Hate
We Hate Because We Fear
We Fear Because We Don’t ...
JA’SON WHITE No. If I let myself love you, I won’t throw myself in front of her. I’ll throw myself in front o...
RICHELLE MEAD There was no helping her tears. For they would leave Po behind… She cried into his shoulder like a...
KRISTIN CASHORE I don’t know what message to send to Bran. Help him Tyrion.”
“What help could I give him?...
GEORGE R.R. MARTIN Help yourself, and Heaven will help you.
JEAN DE LA FONTAINE Asking for help with shame says:
You have the power over me.
Asking with condescen...
AMANDA PALMER If you don’t value excellence, you won’t achieve excellence.
GLENN C. STEWART no one can recover if they won’t admit the wrongdoings.
i won’t recover if i pretend it wa...
TAYLOR RHODES I want to drag you off and hide you away,” he whispered.
“Why?”
“I always knew y...
ANN AGUIRRE Seriously, don't even get me started on my hot bod. You don't want to see me naked, Dave. seeing me ...
JOHN GREEN If you list down whatever you didn’t get to do, then whatever you did won’t feel like it mattere...
SAIM CHEEDA It's just that most really good-looking people are stupid, so I exceed expectations.'
'Right, i...
JOHN GREEN Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how y...
ANNA TAYLOR It's him," I said. "Typhon."
I was seriously hoping Chiron would say something good, like 'No, ...
RICK RIORDAN Oh, darling, you will be good to me, won’t you? Because we’re going to have a strange life.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY I won’t give my heart to another girl until God shows me it’s my wife.
ERIC LUDY She blew out a breath between gritted teeth. “Sometimes I really want to”—a frustrated sound�...
NALINI SINGH If you won’t marry me for the sake of your own honor, then do it for the sake of everyone who woul...
LISA KLEYPAS He’s not that smart.”
“She’s right,” Augustus says. “It’s just that most re...
JOHN GREEN You won’t burn in hell. But be nice anyway.
RICKY GERVAIS Prepare for the worst and you won’t be disappointed.
JOHN CONNOLLY If you think you just can’t make it, you probably won’t.
DAN WALDSCHMIDT despite knowing
they won’t be here for long
they still choose to live
their brighte...
RUPI KAUR I love you, Hermione,” said Ron, sinking back, rubbing his eyes wearily.
Hermione turned fain...
J.K. ROWLING Please, my darling Inej, treasure of my heart, won’t you do me the honor of acquiring me a new hat...
LEIGH BARDUGO Decorate your life with your enemies. so that they won’t get your downfall when you succeed
Cynthi...
CYNTHIA A I prefer to love the one my heart has chosen for me, and I won’t regret it
M.F. MOONZAJER
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DAVE BARRY We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days s...
DAVE BARRY If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
DAVE BARRY And Ted Koppel comes walking down the aisle. We'd met a few times, so we said hello.
DAVE BARRY Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT."
DAVE BARRY There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.
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DAVE BARRY If Black Stache laughed, you laughed. If he snarled, you snarled. If he breathed in your direction, ...
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DAVE BARRY If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you wo...
DAVE BARRY It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This...
DAVE BARRY Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religi...
DAVE BARRY A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
DAVE BARRY Spiders so large they appear to be wearing the pelts of small mammals.
DAVE BARRY I gotta tell you, ... It's pretty crazy when you think about taking whatever's on the other end of t...
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DAVE BARRY one of South Florida's most vital natural resources, a relentlessly sane voice in a howling hurrican...
DAVE BARRY drink beer. But that's kind of my goal pretty much wherever I go.
DAVE BARRY I'm very pleased that we made the top four. But I feel that we could have had a stronger showing.
DAVE BARRY I've been asked to make an announcement, ... There is a non-luxury car in the parking lot. We've bee...
DAVE BARRY The term SAT is a set of initials, or autonym, standing for Scholastic Attitude Treaty Organization.
DAVE BARRY We've actually gotten better musically over the years, ... But we've come to realize that we will ne...
DAVE BARRY Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it.
DAVE BARRY Like many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art...
DAVE BARRY I find myself having these conversations where I go...“You know, the guy, in that place. The guy i...
DAVE BARRY Some archeologists believe that Stonehenge - the mysterious arrangement of enormous elongated stones...
DAVE BARRY Ridley is a tea drinker.
DAVE BARRY It's a concept I've often thought of.
DAVE BARRY You get people from all walks of life here -- who work in domestic service.
DAVE BARRY I believe that's one of the finest action regurgitation scenes in the history of literature, ... I'd...
DAVE BARRY We became pretty sensitive about it. We visited Great Ormond Street Hospital when we were in England...
DAVE BARRY What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge ham...
DAVE BARRY I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.
DAVE BARRY Buying the right computer and getting it to work properly is no more complicated than building a nuc...
DAVE BARRY Because of the level of my chess game, I was able - even against a weak opponent, such as my younger...
DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby’s grandparents. You feel completely comfortable ent...
DAVE BARRY Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant d...
DAVE BARRY I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules,including:* Both of your socks sh...
DAVE BARRY Puns are little 'plays on words' that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look...
DAVE BARRY There comes a time in a man's life when he hears the call of the sea. If the man has a brain in his ...
DAVE BARRY The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winte...
DAVE BARRY It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
DAVE BARRY