Sometimes the greatest things are the most embarrassing.


Ellen DeGeneres

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The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
ADRIEN BRODY
Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution.

Procrastinate now, don’t put it...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I think Ellen DeGeneres is just hysterical.
PAUL RUDD
The mainstream needs Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O'Donnell. The mainstream needs RuPaul.
BILLY EICHNER
The Ellen DeGeneres show called, and they are interested in Ian. We didn't expect anything like that...
IAN GILCHRIST
Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Who knows, it could have been Hillary Clinton herself, doing a Freudian slip during a commercial bre...
BRIAN DONAHUE
Who knows, it could have been Hillary Clinton herself, doing a Freudian slip during a commercial bre...
BRIAN DONAHUE
It's not being marketed as a gay show by a gay person. It's just Ellen DeGeneres.
KYAN DOUGLAS
We'll go see some theater, and we'll hang out and do some stuff there. We'll go to clubs, ... Ellen ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
When I was a kid, Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O'Donnell were mere blips on the gaydar; and they we...
BETH DITTO
Sometimes the most difficult, horrific things can be the greatest spiritual teachers.
CAMERON MATHISON
I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, So...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, ''...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Comedy and politics have a lot in common. Both are great ways to pick up chicks - just look at Gover...
ALEXANDRA PETRI
The things that pose the greatest threats to your survival are the most real things.
JORDAN B. PETERSON
Sometimes the simplest things are the most profound.
CAROLINA HERRERA
It's just the way Ellen does things.
JAN HARDESTY
I was a big Jay Leno fan, so I was sorry to see him go. But my number one person that I watch, she&#...
MEGYN KELLY
[• Ellen DeGeneres , who was praised for her graceful performance as host of the Emmy Awards that ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You will see that the things you desire most are the very things that bring you the greatest sorrow.
CHRISTOPHER PIKE
The most important things in life aren't things.
ANTHONY J. D'ANGELO
Sometimes the things we want most in life are the things that will kill us.
DONALD MILLER
This is an evolving kind of situation, and what might have been appropriate a week ago might not be ...
KEN EHRLICH
Sometimes things are most truly revealed by the illuminance of twilight
CHRISTOPHER MOLINEUX
If we all look at life we think how nice, then we look at death and everybody goes oh you can say th...
GARY F EVANS...
Any simpleton can speak with confidence. Sometimes the greatest fools have the most bravado.
BRANDON MULL
If you are reading this, you have the greatest gift in life. You are alive, so make the most of your...
KISHAN S CHAUHAN
I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth...
BIL KEANE
Beauty is the light within. Only when you see the light within yourself will others see it in you.
F. JOHNSON
The actors are the greatest executors of tone in a film. They're the most important cinematic co...
ALEXANDER PAYNE
One of the most important things for an actor is to observe humanity.
CARLA GUGINO
Sometimes our best action result in things that are most regrettable.
DIANA GABALDON
sometimes the most simple things in the world can be the most beautiful.
ROWENA BEAUMONT CHERRY
It's the most embarrassing thing I've ever been through,
LARRY PHILLIPS
It was really interesting because most of the things at Girl Scouts are for the little girls and sel...
BURGANDY NEWELL
Sometimes the little things in life mean the most.
ELLEN HOPKINS
At the top, I put the camera's viewfinder to my eye and slowly turned, the way my grandmother had ta...
MARY SIMSES
Gwyneth Paltrow names her kid Apple. I'm not going to let that stand.
KATHY GRIFFIN
I'm just calm under fire. I'm not intimidating at all.
KEENEN IVORY WAYANS
In rare instances you have to give up what you thought was a great scene.
KEENEN IVORY WAYANS
I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES
Education, housing and hospitals are the most important things for society.
ZAHA HADID
Greatest fools are the most often satisfied.
NICHOLAS BOILEAU
Sometimes the greatest messages come out of the greatest messes.
STEVE MARABOLI
It's one of the most important things at the end of the day, being able to say no to an investme...
HENRY KRAVIS
Even the most embarrassing mishap can be spun into comedic gold.
ZACH ANNER
Sometimes we have to get rid off the things that are weighing us down and people carry the most weig...
DEYON ANTEKO PITTER
A couple of customers interrupted [...] who wanted to know if we had some YA book about ants and ali...
SHAUN DAVID HUTCHINSON
Orion is above the horizon now, and near it Jupiter, brighter than it will ever be ... But i expect ...
THOMAS HARRIS
The greatest grossness sometimes accompanies the greatest refinement, as a natural relief.
WILLIAM HAZLITT
If time be of all things the most precious, wasting time must be the greatest prodigality.
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
I always entertain the notion that I'm wrong, or that I'll have to revise my opinion. Most o...
ANTHONY BOURDAIN
Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.
A.A. MILNE (WINNIE THE POOH)
Sometimes, the smallest things take up the most room in your heart
A.A. MILNE
One of the most important things, actually, when you're playing on grass, is to move.
MARAT SAFIN
One of the most important things about looking youthful is to have a modern haircut.
EVELYN LAUDER
I have understood that the most important things are tenderness and kindness. I can't do without...
BRIGITTE BARDOT
Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing.
ALBERT EINSTEIN
Sometimes the greatest things happen when they have no rhyme or reason to. Life and logic might be a...
JAMIE SCHOFFMAN
History keeps her secrets longer than most of us. But she has one secret that I will reveal to you t...
JOHN LE CARR
History keeps her secrets longer than most of us. But she has one secret that I will reveal to you t...
JOHN LE CARRE
History keeps her secrets longer than most of us. But she has one secret that I will reveal to you t...
JOHN LECARRE
The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.
SIR WINSTON CHURCHILL
The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.
WINSTON S. CHURCHILL
I guess you never think your enemy is as clever as you are.
CINDA WILLIAMS CHIMA
The greatest victory in life is to rise above the material things that we once valued most.
MUHAMMAD ALI
Capitalism is the astounding belief that the most wickedest of men will do the most wickedest of thi...
JOHN MAYNARD KEYNES
Capitalism is the astounding belief that the most wickedest of men will do the most wickedest of thi...
JOHN MAYNARD KEYNES
One of the greatest resources people cannot mobilize themselves is that they try to accomplish great...
NIDO QUBEIN
Sometimes the greatest tests of our strength are situations that don't seem so obviously dangerous. ...
RICHELLE MEAD
Sometimes the greatest meals on vacations are the ones you find when Plan A falls through.
ANTHONY BOURDAIN
The greatest virtues are those which are most useful to other persons.
ARISTOTLE
The greatest virtues are those which are most useful to other persons
ARISTOTLE
The greatest virtues are those which are most useful to other persons.
ARISTOTLE
Roseanne was a huge groundbreaking comedian. Margaret Cho. Ellen DeGeneres, and then on 'Saturda...
REBECCA TRAISTER
children are the most important people in the world, no matter what happens they always be yours. so...
MIKE GRIST
Good writing is remembering detail. Most people want to forget. Don't forget things that were painfu...
PAULA DANZIGER
Sometimes,' said Pooh, 'the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.
A.A. MILNE
Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.
RICKI LAKE
Food is everything. Food, friends, family: Those are the most important things in life.
ZAC POSEN
One of the most important things to remember about infant care is: don't change diapers in midst...
DON MARQUIS
One of the most important things we hear is the S.B.A. needs to be ubiquitous. We do all these thing...
KAREN MILLS
It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.
ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE
The greatest virtues are those which are most useful to other persons. -Aristotle.
ARISTOTLE
If you love someone you must set them free like the wind and give them the respect they deserve.If y...
GARY F EVANS...
I am saddened by how people treat one another and how we are so shut off from one another and how we...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I would love for the world to be happier.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me...
ELLEN DEGENERES
So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying i...
ELLEN DEGENERES
If you're going to be honest with yourself, you have to admit that you go into show business wan...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgment. I just think peop...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
ELLEN DEGENERES
And now I've got to explain the smell that was in there before I went in there. Does that ever happe...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are.
ELLEN DEGENERES
The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens....
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm just saying we can all work on our manners. We can say please and thank you. We can be punctual....
ELLEN DEGENERES
Above all things physical, it is more important to be beautiful on the inside - to have a big hear a...
ELLEN DEGENERES

More Ellen DeGeneres

I am saddened by how people treat one another and how we are so shut off from one another and how we...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I would love for the world to be happier.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me...
ELLEN DEGENERES
So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying i...
ELLEN DEGENERES
If you're going to be honest with yourself, you have to admit that you go into show business wan...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgment. I just think peop...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
ELLEN DEGENERES
And now I've got to explain the smell that was in there before I went in there. Does that ever happe...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are.
ELLEN DEGENERES
The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens....
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm just saying we can all work on our manners. We can say please and thank you. We can be punctual....
ELLEN DEGENERES
Above all things physical, it is more important to be beautiful on the inside - to have a big hear a...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The thing everyone should reali...
ELLEN DEGENERES
It always helps to think about other people instead of ourselves.
ELLEN DEGENERES
If someone ever says you’re weird, say thank you.
ELLEN DEGENERES
If your Birthday is on Christmas day and you're not Jesus, you should start telling people your birt...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You just have to keep driving down the road. It's going to bend and curve and you'll speed up and sl...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Haiku sounds like I'm
Saying hi to someone named
Ku. Hi, Ku. Hello.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Answers to Frequently Asked Questions:
Yes.
Yes.
No.
One time in high school. ELLEN DEGENERES
Contribute to the world. Help people. Help one person. Help someone cross the street today. Help som...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Now,I'm no scientist,but I know what endorphins are. They're tiny little magical elves that swim thr...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy for yourself and yours...
ELLEN DEGENERES
So be who you really are. Embrace who you are. Literally. Hug yourself. Accept who you are. Unless y...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Who's to say what's better or worse anyway? Who's to even say what's normal or average? We're all di...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Our flaws are what makes us human. If we can accept them as part of who we are, they really don't ev...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. You also ha...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Way, way back in the day, like in the 1990s, if you wanted to tell everyone you ate waffles for brea...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clappin...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I personally like being unique. I like being my own person with my own style and my own opinions and...
ELLEN DEGENERES
It's failure that gives you the proper perspective on success.
ELLEN DEGENERES
It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Find out who you are and figure out what you believe in. Even if it's different from what your neigh...
ELLEN DEGENERES
What’s not so great is that all this technology is destroying our social skills. Not only have we ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
True beauty is not related to what color your hair is or what color your eyes are. True beauty is ab...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.
ELLEN DEGENERES
When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when...
ELLEN DEGENERES
My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the c...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Laugh. Laugh as much as you can. Laugh until you cry. Cry until you laugh. Keep doing it even if peo...
ELLEN DEGENERES
If you want to test cosmetics, why do it on some poor animal who hasn't done anything? They should u...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, So...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was in yoga the other day. I was in full lotus position. My chakras were all aligned. My mind is c...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Don't give advice. It will come back and bite you in the [butt]. Don't take anyone's advice. So, my ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhar...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The only thing I really recommend, if you're starting out in stand-up is to not try to copy anyb...
ELLEN DEGENERES
People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
ELLEN DEGENERES
The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
People give me such a hard time because I don't wear dresses. What's that got to do with any...
ELLEN DEGENERES
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Find out who you are and be that person. That's what your soul was put on this Earth to be. Find...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beauti...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I don't pay attention to the number of birthdays. It's weird when I say I'm 53. It just ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
We focus so much on our differences, and that is creating, I think, a lot of chaos and negativity an...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I think everybody should have the same anger towards the injustice that's happening and the hatr...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I have sadness in me. I have anger in me. I have heartbreak in me.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Whatever you define family as, family is just a part of belonging to something that takes care of yo...
ELLEN DEGENERES
We need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter. I definitely want to contribute to ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I get those fleeting, beautiful moments of inner peace and stillness - and then the other 23 hours a...
ELLEN DEGENERES
If we're destroying our trees and destroying our environment and hurting animals and hurting one...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Here are the values that I stand for: honesty, equality, kindness, compassion, treating people the w...
ELLEN DEGENERES
It's our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting. Are they...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I just want to find somebody special, somebody that I click with.
ELLEN DEGENERES
We have two dogs, Mabel and Wolf, and three cats at home, Charlie, George and Chairman. We have two ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I didn't grow up in a house - we moved a lot, and we always lived in apartments. But we looked a...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Right before I decided to come out, I went on a spiritual retreat called 'Changing the Inner Dia...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's j...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm sure there's somebody out there who doesn't like Betty White because she's short...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I love kids. But that's such a big commitment. And it seems long-term. It seems like a commitmen...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about w...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I like being busy and juggling a lot of things at the same time. I get bored easily, so I need to do...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I work really hard at trying to see the big picture and not getting stuck in ego. I believe we'r...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm not an activist; I don't look for controversy. I'm not a political person, but I'...
ELLEN DEGENERES
My father was a first reader in the Christian Science Church, which is similar to being a preacher. ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I became vegan because I saw footage of what really goes on in the slaughterhouses and on the dairy ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you realize you've ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm so unfamiliar with the gym, I call it James!
ELLEN DEGENERES
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we d...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I do have ADD and in real life, I'm all over the place and can hardly focus. If we were talking ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tabl...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You know, it's hard work to write a book. I can't tell you how many times I really get going on an i...
ELLEN DEGENERES
When I was younger I thought success was something different. I thought, " When I grow up, I want to...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is a powerful thing, and I thi...
ELLEN DEGENERES
What you look like on the outside is not what makes you cool at all. I mean, I had a mullet and wore...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The way I see it... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your brain ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Really, he called me that? Ellen DeGenerate? I've been getting that since fourth grade. I guess I'm ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The good psychic would pick up the phone before it rang. Of course it is possible there was noone on...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Sometimes when I am driving I get so angry at inconsiderate drivers that I want to scream at them. B...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I...
ELLEN DEGENERES
They say you just stand over there, he'll say thank you and you walk back off and that's what I thou...
ELLEN DEGENERES
In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was s...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and ha...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.
ELLEN DEGENERES
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we d...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. I...
ELLEN DEGENERES
For me, it's that I contributed, ... That I'm on this planet doing some good and making people happy...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I didn't go to college at all, any college, and I'm not saying you wasted your time or money, but lo...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Life is like one big Mardi Gras. But instead of showing your boobs, show people your brain, and if t...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Some of the most devastating things that happen to you will teach you the most.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Follow your passion. Stay true to yourself. Never follow someone else's path unless you're in the wo...
ELLEN DEGENERES
People love gossip. It's the biggest thing that keeps the entertainment industry going.
ELLEN DEGENERES
And we certainly don't have full conversations on cellphones. You know? Usually the reception is so ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
"I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I just feel like every kid is growing up too fast and they're seeing too much. Everything is abo...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had...
ELLEN DEGENERES
its like picking your least favorite color of the rainbow
ELLEN DEGENERES
I have a great career, and I have wonderful fans who really are supportive and loyal - because I'...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Our egos tells us we're the only ones that have any kind of feelings. We're the only ones with a rel...
ELLEN DEGENERES
People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
ELLEN DEGENERES
And be sure to look for me next month when I host the North Korean Peoples Choice Awards.
ELLEN DEGENERES
We've quit our agents, let go of our publicist. We're selling our house and leaving town.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Soap Talk.
ELLEN DEGENERES
There are a million people who are refugees, ... Life goes on, and if it didn't impact you directly,...
ELLEN DEGENERES
[I went to a] coffee shop here and the smallest coffee is a tall... "I need a coffee with a side of ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I didn't want the Web site to be impersonal and I wanted to interact with people, ... The hammer and...
ELLEN DEGENERES
"Here's the analogy. If my body were a car, I'd be thinking about trading it in around now. I would ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Oh she tripped?....Nooo, she's running. I thought she tripped but she's running. She stopped running...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Friends will write me letters. They run out of room on the front of the letter. They write 'over' on...
ELLEN DEGENERES
[Golden eagles have an interesting way of mating, where they connect in the air while flying at eigh...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in my mind I'm just like...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I collect old portraits. They're all just interesting pictures of people, and you just kind of w...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Faith is part of who I am, yes. I was raised Christian Scientist. The most important thing I saw eve...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I do fantasize about having my own shop one day.
ELLEN DEGENERES
But seriously, I think overall in the scheme of things winning an Emmy is not important. Let's g...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Just go up to somebody on the street and say "You're it!" and just run away.
ELLEN DEGENERES
In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. The...
ELLEN DEGENERES
If we're destroying our trees and destroying our environment and hurting animals and hurting one...
ELLEN DEGENERES
...if you want to add a little spice to your life, plant some dill. And learn to salsa.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm a lesbian, an Aquarian, and a vegetarian.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I do like men and I had, you know, a guy in high school that I wanted to marry desperately. He's...
ELLEN DEGENERES
When we were growing up our parents somehow made it clear that being famous was good. And I mistaken...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Dan: 'Ah, well, I hope this didn't have anything to do with me.'

Ellen: 'No, not unless y...
ELLEN DEGENERES
My aunt has lost everything, she has nothing. She grabbed four pictures out of her house. She's lost...
ELLEN DEGENERES
My dad is still Christian Scientist. My mom's not, and I'm not. But I believe in God, and th...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
ELLEN DEGENERES
"I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises." ELLEN DEGENERES "I think people talk too much anyway. Sometimes people are talking to me and in my mind I'm just lik...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm probably the most honest person you'll ever meet - to a fault, like, I-will-hurt-your-fe...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Hosting the Oscars is pretty much the scariest thing you can do. To me, this is right up there with ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I would say 'no'! It's such a thankless job. If you do great, nobody mentions it. If you don't, ever...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I think I let go of the need for approval,
ELLEN DEGENERES
I think I let go of the need for approval, ... It certainly feels good when you get it, but I used t...
ELLEN DEGENERES
But seriously, I think overall in the scheme of things winning an Emmy is not important. Let's get o...
ELLEN DEGENERES
"I see those picketers, and I think you know, if I weren't a loving, non-violent, spiritual person, ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The sixties were when hallucinogenic drugs were really, really big. And I don't think it's a coincid...
ELLEN DEGENERES
"I swear if Colgate comes out with one more type of toothepaste. I just want clean teeth that's all ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Why is it that when you wipe up dust its called dusting but when you wipe up a spill its not called ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me be...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The problem with labels is that they lead to stereotypes and stereotypes lead to generalizations and...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Don't hold onto things, it will only bring you pain.
ELLEN DEGENERES
That's what life is all about. There's a lot of crying. So you'd better cry now and get used to it.
ELLEN DEGENERES
The only way a no-legged leopard could hurt you is if it fell out of a tree onto your head.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I still get scared at night. Every tiny creak, every little noise, I open my eyes real wide and list...
ELLEN DEGENERES
[• Ellen DeGeneres , who was praised for her graceful performance as host of the Emmy Awards that ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
We'll go see some theater, and we'll hang out and do some stuff there. We'll go to clubs, ... Ellen ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, ''...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I feel sorry for the newscasters you know? We can turn it off. But that's their job and they have to...
ELLEN DEGENERES
"I'm feeling so good. I feel like a million bucks. I'm focused, I'm alert, I'm zippy and top of my g...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Come on, if you don't win tonight it doesn't mean you're not a good person, it just means you're not...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You know me. Any excuse to put on a dress.
ELLEN DEGENERES
"I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises."
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave it, ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Hello?..Oh, hi Tom. Ooh, I've been dying to see that movie...Mmm no, I just opened up some yogurt. I...
ELLEN DEGENERES
It's definitely a heterosexual feeling, but it's directed at you.
ELLEN DEGENERES
Yeah [I'm thirty-six], but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old w...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I was raised around heterosexuals, as all heterosexuals are, that's where us gay people come from......
ELLEN DEGENERES
Trying to get the talk show, looking back on it, we had to beg a lot of station managers to pick up ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The first house I bought was a little Spanish bungalow on Clinton Street in West Hollywood, right be...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
It's not like I grew up playing pranks on people, and I was not that girl in school.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I just like observing people - it's something I've done ever since I was a kid, and I got re...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Yeah I'm thirty-six, but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Anne wrote it for me and directed, so I was stuck with it, ... We always got along. It's almost gros...
ELLEN DEGENERES
New Orleans is my hometown, and our thoughts and prayers go out to everyone affected.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I've been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I have three women on my...
ELLEN DEGENERES
In the beginning there was nothing. God said, ‘Let there be light!’ And there was light. There w...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I get bored easily, so I need to do a lot. I've started a record label, so I get to nurture new ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I enjoy growing older and wiser and learning from my mistakes every single day.
ELLEN DEGENERES
I've moved about 10 times over the past 15 years. I don't move for the sole purpose of getti...
ELLEN DEGENERES
The first time probably people really were aware of me, I unfortunately had the title of Showtime...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses,...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. It is the universe's way of saying stop, slo...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen ...
ELLEN DEGENERES
Our attention span is shot. We've all got Attention Deficit Disorder or ADD or OCD or one of these d...
ELLEN DEGENERES
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I would love to have the same rights as everybody else. I would love, I don't care if it's c...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I'm grateful for everything. I'm grateful for my health, and I'm so grateful for the lov...
ELLEN DEGENERES
I say always follow your passion, no matter what, because even if it's not the same financial su...
ELLEN DEGENERES